Joe Rogan podcast. Check it out.

>> The Joe Rogan Experience.

>> TRAIN BY DAY. JOE ROGAN PODCAST BY

NIGHT. All day.

>> All right. Slap some headphones on.

Let's rock and roll, sir.

>> Yes.

Our old friend would be so happy. And

not just that picture, but so much that

you've done. Do like do you believe that

people who have gone on know what we're

doing or see us?

>> I don't know. You'd like to think that

you're that important.

>> Oh, yeah.

>> I have a feeling they have more

important stuff to do on the other side.

>> Yeah. I guess if you're in heaven,

you're not thinking about the

mothership,

>> right?

>> But um

>> Well, the mothership definitely is from

her.

>> Yes. Yes.

>> Yeah. Well, I mean, that's an incredible

tribute to her. Um,

>> well, the bar is named after her.

>> Yeah, I've heard all the comics. I've

heard Shane and Ian and all the guys

talk about it after they came back. Um,

and that's just an honor, man. That that

plus, you know, I used to say to people,

if you haven't taken something from

watching Richard Prior, you're probably

doing it wrong,

>> right? And Mitsy

made the greatest comedy mecca ever. And

you got to copy what she did.

>> 100%.

>> Yeah.

>> Wow. And this is

>> Yeah. She taught me everything about how

to run a club, how to do it right.

Basically, kind of let the comedians run

it. Let the inmates run the asylum.

>> Yeah.

>> You know.

>> Yeah. We're uh perfect inmates for that.

and and and right now the comedy store

is greater than ever.

>> That's awesome.

>> Yeah, it's it it's wonderful there

because, you know, I even got Jay Leno

to come back, you know, cuz he

remembered the old days and hadn't gone

back and I'm like, dude, it's different.

They they pay you for coming. They split

the door in a different way now and

there are phones in bags. I had to

explain that concept.

>> Yeah, we had to encourage them to do all

that. Yeah, that was your era.

>> Yeah. Well, once we left, we started

doing that at the mothership for all the

shows, then other comedy clubs started

following suit. It's the way to do it.

People are too [ __ ] distracted.

>> Yeah. And I think it it frees us up in a

way. I'll say things and try things and

not worry about seeing them on YouTube

uh when they're not ready or when I've

made a mistake and gone too far and said

something, you know.

>> Oh, 100%. It's also you have to be free

to [ __ ] around and experiment and if

someone takes that [ __ ] around

experiment and you don't know what's

coming out of your mouth like right now

I don't know what's coming out of my

mouth right before I say it right and

people have to understand that this is

not like when you're on stage and you're

working out like a lot of it is free

balling you've got material that's like

pre sort of established and you you're

you know you've got the the bones of it

but you're also [ __ ] around in the

moment and sometimes Sometimes you [ __ ]

around in the moment and it works and

sometimes you [ __ ] around in the moment

and it does nothing. It goes or it's

terrible. You said something awful.

You're like, "Whoops, sorry."

>> Yeah. We make mistakes.

>> You're just [ __ ] creating something

and then standup is the only art form

that you have to kind of create in front

of a crowd. You can't really You can get

ideas and the concepts and the flesh of

it alone, but you have it comes alive in

front of the crowd. You have to be able

to [ __ ] around.

>> Yeah. I um

me and Chappelle and you've you've done

this kind of thing. Me and Chappelle met

Chris Rock in Cleveland cuz Chappelle

lives in Ohio. Obviously he's done

something very similar to what you've

done, but we'll get into it later.

>> Yeah. He's done something really cool.

>> Incredible.

>> Basically took over a whole town.

>> Yeah. Yeah. And it's funny and

especially had a really funny joke about

it about how uh when white people move

into a neighborhood, it's called

gentrification. and he goes, "They don't

have a word for I'm doing what I'm doing

to these motherfuckers."

>> Yeah. It's crazy to be Dave Chappelle,

the most important man in town.

>> Yeah.

>> But uh Chris Rock was doing Cleveland

and uh we met him there and that was the

first time I saw the bags

>> people and and I was apprehensive. Um,

as a matter of fact, I saw a celebrity

in LA who didn't want to put his phone

in a bag and so they had that

[ __ ] stay outside, you know?

>> Yeah. There's too many snitches in this

world. Too many people just want to film

everything for the Graham.

>> Yeah.

>> Like, stop.

>> Yeah. Sometimes we're saying the wrong

thing. Sometimes we're drunk.

>> Yeah. You know,

>> for sure. A lot.

>> Yeah.

>> Yeah. A lot. Dave loves to get lit and

go on stage, but it's also like that's

one of the ways he creates. Like I've

seen him do entire shows where he's just

completely [ __ ] around and he films

everything. So then afterwards he goes

over it. He's like, "Oh, there's a seed

right there. Let me plant that seed."

Yeah.

>> You know, there's an idea there. And

then, you know, it's how you come up

with stuff.

>> Yeah. I I never drink or smoke before

going on stage,

but I love to create it home. And the

next day, cuz sometimes you can write

something down and it'll be like uh

blazer button envelope and the next day

you're like, I don't know what the [ __ ]

I thought was funny about that last

night when I was smoking. But I I like

to smoke and create at home and then

take it to the stage. But when I'm on

stage,

>> I've had bad experiences trying to do it

high and say, "This will make me

creative. I'll be like Hendrickx of

comedy." And uh uh that's all wrong.

>> Your memory will go.

>> Yeah, your memory will go. One time I

was at the Laugh Factory and uh I came

off and George Lopez said to me, "Why

you come off?" And I said, "I told you

I'd do 20." And he says, "You did five."

>> I was in Tonight Show mode or some [ __ ]

you know.

>> Hey, speak I got to clear something up.

Speaking of this has nothing to do with

you, but I did a podcast last week with

Theo Vaughn and uh in it one there was

like a video on the internet is accusing

me of lying about something and what I

said was that I was in the mountains of

Utah when the Charlie Kirk thing was

going down. What it actually happened

was I was here doing a podcast with

Charlie Sheen when the Charlie Kirk

thing went down. when he we stopped and

take took a piss break, right? And

that's when we found out about it,

right?

>> Um and then when I was in the mountains

of Utah, that's when the Jimmy Kimmel

thing was happening. When Jimmy Kimmel

was getting in trouble and I was getting

all these messages, but I didn't have

any service out there, so I had to hook

up to Starlink in order to find out what

was happening.

>> Yeah.

>> When I did the podcast the other day, it

seemed like I was saying that I was in

the mountains when Charlie Kirk got

shot. I probably was saying that I was

exhausted when I did that show last

week. I So I did a show on Tuesday night

at the club and I have this thing that I

do unfortunately where I come home and

it's the only time that I get alone time

is when everyone's asleep and I stayed

up way too late. I stayed up super late.

Then I had to take my kid to school in

the morning

>> and I was like I'll just power through.

The problem when I do that when I get no

sleep is my memory is dog [ __ ]

>> Mhm. Like I have a really good memory

and a terrible memory. It's really good

a lot of the times and then sometimes,

especially when I'm tired, it's [ __ ]

terrible. It's like from doing thousands

of podcasts.

>> Yeah.

>> My memory is like a room that's filled

with boxes and and files

>> and I don't know where the [ __ ]

everything is.

>> See, as you were talking, the first

thing everything goes to sports for me.

some of our greatest home run hitters,

uh, they strike out a lot because

they're swinging all the [ __ ]

time trying to get it to McCovy Cove or

something, of course. And I think that's

how we are. Well, not we, you especially

right now. You're doing this constantly.

You're talking to lots of people saying

lots of things

>> and every now and then there's going to

be swinging a miss. Let me explain that.

>> But the real problem was sleepy. The

real problem was not getting any sleep.

And I'm not going to do that anymore cuz

I keep doing the thing. I get home at

night.

>> Have you had that problem before? Like

sleep deprivation and you get yourself

into something.

>> I've had that problem before. Usually I

can fix it with creatine. So creatine is

a great supplement when you're tired. Um

it really there there's been studies

that show that creatine um

supplementation, especially like 10 to

20 grams. Um it actually alleviates all

of the problems that happen with sleep

deprivation in terms of uh cognitive

function. Mhm.

>> But I've been I I just was doing some

blood work.

>> So when I was knew that I was going to

do my blood work, I didn't take any

creatine for a month because I want to

cuz I'd read something about creatine

possibly being bad for your kidneys. So

I wanted to get a baseline, do it, and

then do it again when I I suffer. So I

had this like strategy. But the point is

like

>> I went Yeah. My brain was foggy. And so

for the people that like heard that and

like what is wrong with you? That's what

I thought when I saw like somebody put a

video on the line. Why is he lying about

this? I'm like, oh, I forgot. It wasn't

a lie. It's just my brain sucks when I

don't get sleep and I'm not going to do

that anymore because it's like when I

get home at night

>> is the only time I'm alone. It's like my

only alone time. And I'm I even though I

knew I had to get up in the morning and

take my kid to school, I was like, I

don't [ __ ] care. I'm staying up. The

problem with that is like when I have to

do this the next day, I just don't

function as good. I've done it. I've

done it before, but I feel it the next

day. Like I can't recall things. My my

words don't come out as smooth. I don't

have as much. My my vocabulary is

limited. It's like there's too many

problems with it. So,

>> I mean, two things have been my mind.

First of all, do guys with these arms do

creatine? I mean, would it help me?

>> Oh, it's great for everybody. Yeah,

creatine is not just a supplement for

muscles. Creatine is actually a really

good cognitive function supplement. It's

actually a cognitive enhancing

supplement. Yeah, there's a lot of

research on that.

>> Yeah.

>> And the other thing that that hit me is

I was listening to you talk recently and

you talked about smoking herb and how it

enhanced the weightlifting process. You

>> Yeah.

>> What What's that about?

>> You feel it in your tissues, man. It's

like you feel it's really good for

coordination exercise. Like there's a

lot of jiu-jitsu guys who smoke weed.

>> They smoke weed right before class like

get ripped

>> and then

>> So the were high when I first started

seeing

>> Not those guys. Those guys don't do it,

but a lot of guys do. I think one of the

one of the I don't want to throw them

under the bus, but one of the brothers

was really into smoking weed and doing

jiu-jitsu and

>> arguably the best one. Definitely the

best one. But um a lot of jiu-jitsu guys

do it and uh a lot of guys like to do it

before kickboxing. It's like you just

feel your muscles more. You feel like

your coordination more. You're more

sensitive. It's weird.

>> It's like instead of it you being like

abstract with your movements and you

know just kind of like doing it. It's

like you feel all the tissues, all the

connection when you lift weights. You're

like like you feel all the fibers of all

your [ __ ] moving. It's like it just

makes you more sensitive. It's such an

un misunderstood substance. Not for

everybody. I really believe some people

should not get high. I think for some

people it throws them off and sends them

down a dark road and it's just not

>> causes them to procrastinate about their

life and personal responsibilities.

>> There's a lot of that. There's a lot of

people that just wake and bake and just

live in the cloud all day and never get

anything anything done. And then there's

a lot of people that also get like super

paranoid and they get anxiety and they

freak out. And then there's people that

there's a lot of uh connections to

marijuana and psychosis or um

schizophrenic states that some But the

problem with that is

>> were they already like did they already

have a propensity towards schizophrenia

and marijuana pushed them over the edge?

Were they going to get it anyway? Like

it's hard to say.

>> A lot of those guys on a diet coke would

have problems.

>> Yeah. Right. Right. There's a lot of

guys just [ __ ] red lights freak them

out. There's there's people that just

life is too hard for them and they don't

need something else that [ __ ] with it.

You know, if you already have mental

health struggles, probably shouldn't do

mushrooms. You know, if you're already

[ __ ] up, if there's already some

things that you're like struggling to

hang on to everyday life, yeah, you

probably shouldn't do acid. You know

what I mean? Like you should probably

just

>> just try to like keep your [ __ ]

together. But that's not everybody. It's

like alcohol. Like alcohol is not for

everybody, but some people can have a

glass of wine at dinner and just start

laughing. It's a nice social lubricant.

Some people they got one drink and then

they're doing coke and they're getting

hookers and they're [ __ ] driving on

the freeway. They're shooting at cops.

There's like they go crazy. Like some

people just can't handle alcohol.

Doesn't mean it should be illegal.

>> Like that's crazy. And this the same

thing I feel with pot. pot is super

beneficial to a lot of people

>> and has been for millions of years. For

me, that's my uh like in the old days,

you'd watch a television show and a guy

would have a martini when he comes home,

you know.

>> I even talk about that in the book. When

I come home, my girl has me a joint laid

out on the counter, you know, and uh you

know, nice little raw papers.

>> And uh that's my that that's daddy's

cocktail.

>> Yeah. It's a nice one, too, because it

doesn't [ __ ] with your body. The problem

with alcohol is,

>> you know, it feels good while you're

doing it, but then the next day you're

like,

>> yeah,

>> your [ __ ] head and your body's tired.

I hear swelling

>> and, you know, and different kinds of

things can. And also, I'm from a home

where my favorite person, my cousin,

because I I didn't have brothers and

sisters, biological brothers and

sisters. So, when my cousin came to live

with me, a male, he's a teenager, and he

had a drinking problem. Like, I would go

>> inside uh my toy box and find Scotch.

>> Oh, you hide it.

>> Yeah. He would hide it. He's parked in

the garage when there were already two

cars in the garage, you know, and and I

loved him and he was hilarious and he in

part helped to make me who I am. But but

a bad experience like that in your youth

can make you a little bit leery about

liquor.

>> Oh yeah. I had a friend of mine when I

was in high school and his cousin sold

coke and I watched this guy fall apart.

I watched him do cocaine constantly and

fall apart. His life just went down the

toilet and I never touched cocaine

because of that. I never did. I've still

never done coke

>> and I think that's why because I watched

his

>> So you you've never tried a line?

>> Never. Never. That's heavy. Not once.

Yeah. because I had to try it to see

what it smelled like, you know? I mean,

>> I'm sure I'd like it. My friend Jimmy

said, "Don't do this. You'd love it."

But he's probably right.

>> But you also have a certain kind of

discipline where I think you could do a

line and say, "Okay, I get it." But I

love that you have the discipline to

never try it. I I I don't have that kind

of strength. I got to see what it's like

once.

>> There's the thing is like I don't know

anybody who's had like cocaine was

really good for me. Like doing cocaine

was really good. When I started doing

cocaine, my life just really changed. I

really got clarity. I started focusing.

I was nicer to people. I don't ever hear

that story. You never, not once.

>> I did a little coke and then I was

president of Yale and I ran for

>> I do hear people say that about speed,

which is weird. You hear people say that

about amphetamines, like especially

Aderall, like how like, oh my god, it

makes me so productive. I got so much

done. But it's generally it's like

journalists and people that have to

write a lot,

>> students. I I'm very curious about

Adderall because I'm hearing so much

>> and I'm thinking

>> like when I was doing the book, right?

I'm like, would Aderall

be good to focus me to do for me what it

does for students that I hear talk about

it?

>> Probably. Probably. But I don't.

>> It's a pill, right?

>> It scares me though because I know a lot

of people with problems with it. It's

It's a It's a real It's a real catchy

one. It gets you.

>> Yeah.

>> And then you start leaning on.

>> So that that's one of the one of the

downs is it's extremely addicting.

>> Very addictive.

>> But what's the other downside? Any other

>> Well, I would imagine when you get off

of it, you're exhausted because I would

imagine whenever there's there's always

some sort of a biological,

you know, there's there's whenever

there's no free lunch, right? Anything

that speeds you up is going to bring you

down. Like this get if you're ramping

your body up where you're focusing for

[ __ ] 16 hours just sitting in front

of the typer.

>> Yeah. And that's what like why

journalists like it.

>> Yeah.

>> I would imagine the the back end of it.

You've done it Jamie.

>> Yeah.

>> Only twice cuz it kept me up for two

days.

>> See that's what I'm talking about.

That's it.

>> It's an amphetamine. So yeah, I went to

try to go to bed and was like, "Oh, this

isn't happening. So let's get up and see

how Oh, we're up all day. All right."

>> Two days.

>> Yeah. I just I had to call off work. It

wasn't good. And then you feel real

dopey after it wears off. Right.

>> Yeah. It didn't I didn't feel like I

succeeded on anything that day.

>> Man, that is a a [ __ ] problem for me

is like the lack of sleep thing after

this whole Charlie Kirk thing with this

what I was just talking about. I'm

really going to concentrate a lot more

on sleep.

>> You can't [ __ ] with that because it's

like

>> especially me. It's like I need my brain

to be functioning at its highest

potential most of the time. Like that's

what you're do. Especially when I'm in

here. I was talking to Theo Vaughn. I

didn't think it would that be that big

of a deal. Theo's a comic. We're just

gonna be silly. Probably

>> the most the most recent one.

>> Yeah, the one I was just talking about.

It probably be good to be loopy, you

know, like cuz you know the writers on

news radio, they would stay up all night

on purpose

>> just to get loopy because that that was

how because they didn't really do any

drugs. They just would use sleep

deprivation to be silly.

>> Yeah.

>> It was hilarious. Like these guys would

start writing at like 2:00 in the

morning. Like they would stay up, they

would play video games and they would

start writing a script at like two

o'clock in the morning and then they

would stumble in to like when we have a

table read, they would stumble into the

table read like just finishing the

script. They would lay it out to us.

They just got done printing it. And

these guys would be [ __ ] just

completely out of it. Hair all [ __ ]

up, barefoot. It was really funny the

way they operated. But it was there was

a method to their madness. And that

method was the more tired you get, the

more exhausted you get, you get into

sleep deprivation, you get loopy and you

get silly and you start thinking silly

things.

>> Yeah.

>> When those guys, that's how they would

use it. They would use that weird state

of mind, that loopiness to write.

>> Exactly.

>> This episode is brought to you by Zip

Recruiter. When you're picking out

plants for your garden, there's a

million options. Even after considering

things like climate, season, and setup,

you still have a lot to choose from.

Even figuring out which tomato plant to

buy could be a headache because you need

to look at the actual plant. Is it

flowering? Does it have signs of new

growth hiring managers? I know you run

into the same problem. With too many

resumes to go through, how do you make

sure you're talking to the right people?

Well, the answer for you is easy. Zip

Recruiter. Try it for free at

ziprecruiter.com/rogan.

Zip Recruiter is making hiring simple

and fast with its latest feature. It

helps identify top talent who have the

right skills and are interested in your

role. They can even tell you why they're

interested in their own words so you can

get a sense of who they are. Cut through

the standard and get to the standouts

with Zip Recruiter. Four out of five

employers who post on Ziprecruiter get a

quality candidate within the first day.

And now you can try it for free at

ziprecruiter.com/rogan.

That's ziprecruiter.com/rogan.

Meet your match at ziprecruiter.

>> I need my sleep, man. If I have sleep, I

can do anything.

>> Um

>> I feel like they could have got there

with weed without all the the loopiness.

you know, you want to get there like you

can get there with weed and you know,

you don't have to stay up all night. You

get it like right away.

>> Yeah. But weed ain't for everybody.

>> It's not for everybody.

>> It ain't for everybody. And and but but

yeah, I I love having my sleep. As a

matter of fact,

um that's the drug that's most important

to me. Having an ambient nearby.

>> You like that?

>> Yeah. A quarter. A just a little bite of

ambient.

>> A little bite.

>> Yeah. We'll we'll hook you up.

>> I knew a dude who would take that [ __ ]

every day. He had to take it all the

time. And then he was taking two and he

told me like, "Dude, my house could be

on fire and I would have no idea."

>> I'm like, "That can't be good." But he

needed it. It was the only way he could

go to sleep. But he was also taking

Adderall. So he was taking Adderall in

the day and then he was taking ambient

at night.

>> Can't believe he's still alive.

>> Yeah. That's That's too much.

>> Yeah, the Add a [ __ ] his life up, too.

Woo. Yeah, it's not, you know, I don't

think you should rely on anything for

sleep. For me, I just I've never had a

sleep problem, fortunately. I could go

to sleep on a bag of rocks. I could just

crash. It drives my wife nuts

>> cuz like if we're on a plane, the moment

the plane takes off, I'm out cold. I

could just go to sleep. The bad thing

about me is I can sleep best in places I

shouldn't sleep like church

or or sitting talking to my woman

sleepy. I don't know why. Why is why

does church make you so sleepy?

>> Or or reading like reading will put you

out.

>> There are some audible books that are

worse than ambient,

>> right?

>> You know.

>> Yeah. Something about physically reading

puts me out.

>> Yeah.

>> Just sitting there like looking at the

pages, I just start nodding off.

>> Yeah. I I um The Alchemist.

I have been on page 12 for like a year

and a half, you know. Sit down on a

plane and just just read the alchemist

at the top of the page and I'm out.

>> Yeah. It's fiction for me that puts me

out. Non-fiction doesn't really put me

out. Non-fiction is more like I guess

it's more stimulating because it's real,

you know, because I'm reading about real

things. Something about reading fiction

is what puts me to sleep.

>> Yeah. For me, it's just reading. Just I

can take out my license,

>> you know, and look and say, "Oh,

halfway through my name,

out. This is cool, man."

>> Not having sleep is got like a person

that's got like legitimate insomnia.

That's got to be the nuttiest [ __ ]

problem. Like that's that movie The

Mechanic. No, The Machinist. Did you

ever see that movie The Machinist?

>> No. Is that an action movie? Well, it's

that's the movie with uh

>> what's Christian Bale. Christian Bale

where he lost an insane amount of

weight. Like Christian Bale is a big guy

and I think he got to like 130 something

pounds.

>> Yeah.

>> And the the the idea was that this guy

was going completely insane cuz he

couldn't sleep and so he wasn't eating.

And so he was just like up all the time

like out of it. And

>> like if you see what he looked like when

he made that movie, it's like that's

what he looked like in the movie.

>> Oh [ __ ]

>> Yeah.

>> That looks like he's about to make a

whole different movie.

>> Yeah. Like he was about to die and then

he went from that and right afterwards

he did Batman. So he got super jacked.

He went from that and by the way the

movie sucks. So this guy like wrecked

his health for a movie that wasn't even

good.

And I mean, I wonder how good it could

even be when your main guy is dying.

Look at that image on the far right. The

one that you just Look at that. Look at

the difference between That was like six

months later.

>> That can't be healthy.

>> No. [ __ ] terrible for you. It has to

be terrible.

>> Terrible.

>> Do you like to act?

>> No.

>> I don't hate it.

>> I don't like the process. I don't like

waiting around all day. I don't like

being on set. I don't like dealing with

Some actors are great. Some actors, just

like all kinds of people, you know,

cops. There's a lot of cops that are

awesome.

>> Cuz I know you're at a point in your

life when you could probably do anything

you want. And I never see you pursuing

any acting roles.

>> No, I avoid them. Yeah. I've been

offered some fun stuff and I was like,

I'm not going to Bulgaria for three

months. [ __ ] that. I'm just I it's not

my thing. And if it was my thing, I

would I'd be like feel very fortunate

and I' I'd dive on it. I'd be like, "Oh

my god."

>> So when you look at something you've

done and you're watching a role at in

dailies or uh at the premiere, you don't

love what you see so much that you do

more of it.

>> It doesn't bother me, but it's not it's

just not what I enjoy doing.

>> And again, it's the process that's the

problem. It's the 16-hour days. It's

like, and it's being around actors

because you're around people that need

to think and need to talk in a very

specific way because they're always

worried they're going to be cast out of

the kingdom.

>> You know what I mean? So, it's like this

very disingenuous way of communicating

that a lot of actors have. And it's just

>> and you always feel when you do

something that this person's going to be

your friend for life. I I'll see you

next month and you never see that [ __ ]

ever again. It's it's it's such a

disingenuous environment.

>> Do you enjoy it? Do you enjoy acting?

>> Um I kind of like it, but at 70, I

prefer to just be at home.

>> You're 70.

>> Yeah.

>> You look so good.

>> Oh, thank you.

>> That's kind of crazy that you're 70.

>> And no creatine.

>> Imagine how good you'd look at me.

Creatine.

>> I'm going go get it.

>> 70, man. If you told me that you were

45, if I didn't know you, you told me

you were 45, I'd believe you. That's

nuts. That's a blessing. I I

>> Isn't that crazy?

>> Yeah. Yeah. And I'm happy. So, that's

unusual.

>> Yeah. Right. A lot of people when

they're 70, they're bitter and tired.

>> Yeah. I I um I talk a little bit in the

book about Richard Prior coming to my

first condo. I bought a condo so I could

I didn't have a car yet and eventually I

got one. But when I first came to LA, I

wanted to be between the comedy store

and the improv so I could get to both,

you know.

>> Oh, right. So, I bought me a a condo and

I told Richard Prior that I got a condo.

I don't know. It's one of those I I

think I heard you and Shane talking

about it. How you see your heroes now

and then and sometimes you just say the

wrong [ __ ] And I was expecting this to

be the wrong [ __ ] but it's all I could

think of. And I said, "Richard, I just

bought a condo." And he said, "Oh, wow.

I like to see it."

And I was like, "Oh, okay."

and uh him and Rashan, his body man,

came to see my condo and uh that was the

coolest thing in the world. But the one

thing I remember, I remember I had no

furniture and Rashan had told me his his

guy had told me to get some kvassier. So

I had some kvasier, you know, and we sat

on the floor and drank kvassier and

listened to a boom box with jazz on it

and talked. And he looked around at one

point and he said, "This reminds me of

when I was happy." Whoa. And I don't

even have to tell you what went through

my head and what I thought that meant.

And I didn't listen to him then. That's

the thing is people disperse knowledge

to us from their experiences. And

sometimes we're too young and dumb to

listen.

>> What did that mean to you at the time

when he said, "This reminds me when I

was happy."

>> You know, I was I was so excited that

Richard Prior came to see my condo. I

didn't process it. But years later, I

started realizing

um

that he bought things and philosophies

that made his life more complex and uh

he was happy. This is what I think it

means. He was happy with the simple

[ __ ] you know, and sometimes I mean

it's nice to have, isn't it cool to have

money but still eat burgers if you want

to? I mean, cuz I remember walking

through supermarkets and pretending I

was shopping and eating out of the child

cart, that little that little top part,

and then leaving the supermarket, you

know? So, it's nice to be able to buy

anything we want, but at the same time,

I get that thing of the simplicity and,

you know, no guard gate.

Um, nobody's knocking down your door

trying to get to you.

>> Yeah. just just a conto with no

furniture. And for a guy like that, for

the greatest that I've ever known in our

world

>> to say I was happy when I had a little

place with no furniture. Um I didn't

think about it enough then, but later I

realized what he meant when I was in a

house that was too big with guest

houses.

>> Yeah. that would, you know, you walk

into a guest house and cobwebs get on

your face, you know, because you ain't

been in there in a while and you

realize, okay, this is what Richard was

talking about. I'm doing a lot of [ __ ]

for other people that I don't need,

>> right? And too much complexity.

>> Yeah. I Somebody said complications. My

business manager said something about my

staff and it dawned on me, what the [ __ ]

do I have a staff for?

you know, I and and I've simplified

things a little bit in my life and I'm

really happy. It's

>> uh just, you know, me and my woman and a

scaled down life.

>> That's better. Yeah. There's a lot of

people that just want a lot of people

around them because it makes them feel

important. They have a big staff. They

have a lot of people working for them, a

lot of things going on, a lot of

different projects.

>> Keep moving. Keep moving.

>> But no peace.

>> Yeah.

>> Yeah. Not good. I always tell comedians

like they're they're like, "Oh, I got to

get an assistant." I go, "No, you don't.

Just do less shit."

>> Don't get an assistant. You get an

assistant, that person's going to want

to kill you. That person's

>> They're going to feel entitled. You're

making all this money. They're not.

You're famous. They're not. They They

see you for who you really are. They're

f you like you [ __ ] regular guy. Why

has he got all this? Like David Spade's

assistant duct taped him and tased him.

Remember that?

>> Yeah.

>> Try to kill him.

>> That's That's That's heavy, man. That's

And and I've heard that the people who

work for us always hate us. I've always

avoided. Somebody told me,

>> "It's not always the case."

>> They said, "Yo, you know, your

housekeeper hates you." And I'm like,

"No, she's been with me 22 years." Like,

"That [ __ ] hates you, man."

>> And and I don't want to believe that.

It's not always the case, but it is

often the case that people that are

around people that have so much, they

feel like, "Why don't I have this? Like

I'm working for this person. Why am I

not doing But why am I not rich? This

person could just make me rich.

>> It's weird. You know what I mean?

>> Yeah.

>> Like that's not what the job is. The job

is you're a gardener. Gardener doesn't

make $5 million a year. Like this is

you're kind of being crazy.

>> And then you you get people that take

advantage of you where you get a bill

and you're like, why does it cost this

much? Like this is kind like I have a

friend who's very wealthy. He's a

businessman and he goes over every

[ __ ] little thing that people charge

him and he's always looking for they're

[ __ ] trying to overcharge me. He gets

>> signs his own checks.

>> Yeah. But he gets crazy when he thinks

people are overcharging him. But I'm

like, dude, you're almost 80 and you're

worth a billion dollars. Like why do you

why are you looking at like how much the

car wash guy charges you? This is crazy.

>> Maybe that's why he has a billion.

>> Perhaps. I mean, he's a businessman.

That's his thing. But what drives him

nuts is this idea that people are

overcharging him because he's wealthy.

They're taking advantage of him.

>> Joe,

the the craziest I ever went was I had a

barber when I had hair,

>> you know, and you know, a black barber

is a skilled scientist, you know, cuz

back then I had it fried, dyed, and laid

to the side with three Adidas stripes

over on the left. And you know, my [ __ ]

was intricate that year. And um my

business manager happened to be a

business manager for two other

entertainers.

And he's also my friend. And one day he

says, "You know that guy charges the

three of you different prices."

And I'm like, "Get the [ __ ] are So I

found out that Johnny Gil was paying

100, I was paying 350." Ah,

>> and that drives me crazy cuz basically

like you say, he was charging based on

who I am,

>> right? Yeah. He like you can afford it.

>> Yeah. Yeah. And I had a friend who had

more money than me and he was charging

him a crazy amount. It was it was like

the rental of a rose, you know. Crazy

money.

Yeah. Well, that's what comes with the

territory. People just think you're not

going to notice. They don't care, you

know.

>> Yeah,

I guess. Yeah. Do you think you are

happier now than you were when the

Arsenal Hall show was at its peak?

Yeah, I think I'm happier now because

with that peak comes a lot of pressure

and a lot of work. And I'd be a liar to

say I don't enjoy having the money

without the other [ __ ]

>> You know, I I did a good job of

investing and making sure that when the

lights went out,

>> uh I was good. So,

I love my life right now, man. More

relaxed, less pressure.

>> And being the OG and

>> pretty much your responsibility is just

uh giving advice to a comic in the

hallway.

>> Yeah. Uh, you know, a lot of the young

guys don't understand what you did

because what your show was like back in

I guess when was it when did it first

come on the air? What year?

>> Probably uh Coming to America was like

86 87 I left New York and went and

started the show. So 87 88 sometime

around in there. I'm bad with years.

>> Yeah. During that time and in the the

'9s it changed the whole landscape of

late night television. like completely

changed it because late night television

was stiff, you know? It was like, "Yeah,

a [ __ ] the desk. The desk made no

sense to me."

>> I talk I talk about the desk and how I

got rid of it. But but

>> it made no sense. But you what? I was

like, "Oh, finally he got rid of the

desk. The [ __ ] are are we being

lectured? Are am I in the principal's

office? Like what is the [ __ ] desk

for?"

>> But when they first started doing that

in the 1950s, if you went to work, you

had a desk. You had to wear a tie, you

had a desk. And they all smoke

cigarettes while they were on the job.

You know, he watch like the Johnny

Carson show

>> during commercials. Johnny would go

under his desk.

>> Get a cigarette.

>> Yeah. Well, they would often smoke on

air. They would do it all the time back

then. They all smoked.

>> How about planes? How about the fact

that we could get on a plane to go to a

gig and there was a row behind us where

smoking began,

>> right? And I'm in the no smoking row.

And the [ __ ] behind me got a cigar.

>> Yeah. You know,

>> and it was just flooding the entire

cabin.

>> Yes.

>> You know, Dice used to have a joke about

it. You're in a [ __ ] tube.

>> Where's the air going?

>> Yeah.

>> It was a weird time. But the the whole

idea was what I was getting to was like

late night television was very stiff. It

was, you know, it was like

and then your show came around.

>> Paul Anker wrote that,

>> did he?

>> Yeah.

>> Oh, wow.

>> Your show came around and then all of a

sudden it was fun and loose and I

remember when Clinton came on your show

and played the saxophone.

>> Yeah.

>> And that I mean everybody was like,

"What is happening?" The [ __ ]

president of the Was he the president

back then or was he running?

>> No, he was a governor

>> and uh that's right. He was trying to

get the young vote, so he did me. And

then the next day they decided to do MTV

because I think what my show did that

night was changed how you run for the

highest office in the land. And and

>> look at that.

>> Yeah.

>> Look at that.

>> That the joke I had just done was

finally a Democrat blowing something

other than the election.

You when you look you remember jokes in

in the moment. And dude, so What's

interesting is after this

presidential candidates realized they

had to come to Rogan and Sunday morning

to meet the press,

>> you know, and I like that, you know,

they they have to go everywhere now.

Well, they go where the people are

paying attention, right? Mhm.

>> But it's it was different because if

they did the Tonight Show with Johnny

Carson, it would be a, you know, a very

competent interview, but it would be

stiff. It was It was like very I mean,

not even stiff's not the right word. It

was traditional.

>> It was like this was different. Like him

playing the saxophone, running for

president, playing the saxophone. I was

like, "What is happening here?"

>> And I tried to get I I told Jenna Bush

this last week. I'm on this book

slinging tour. And uh I told her I said

I invited your grandpa because back then

there was a mentality that you do equal

uh both sides, you know, and I don't

think it was a rule. But but first of

all, my dad was a Republican, my mother

was a Democrat, so I was used to hearing

both sides and learning both sides. And

I thought the best thing I could do for

young people is show them both sides and

that would be fair of me as a host. And

we got a call from a man named Marlon

Fitzwwater who said, "No [ __ ] way

we're coming there." You know, and and I

wonder why.

>> Um it's almost like what you talk about

with the desk.

Um society at a certain point is stiff

and it takes certain people to loosen it

up and make a change. And uh I I think

it was just they're not used to it. It's

like, why are they barking? And and what

is you know

>> that's right. Things that make you go

hm.

>> Oh yeah. Yeah.

>> Yeah. There was a lot going on.

>> I had a couple of hooks going.

>> Oh, you had a great hook. The things

that make you go home. Everybody used

that all day long. Like when if

something weird was going on in the

office, people things that make you go

hm.

>> And it was so cool. Then they wrote a

song about it. And I would turn on TV

and I would see

>> Was that CNC Music Factory?

>> Yes, that's right.

>> Yeah. And um um I would turn on TV and

like Nordstrom's would have a sale that

makes you go and I was like that's very

cool, you know, and and and it came

about sitting with the writers and um

>> I had done it at the comedy store and he

says, you know, we could use that and

just throw any joke in there like randos

that we don't know where to put,

>> right?

>> And so it really was a a cheating

technique for a comic.

>> Yeah. Perfect nonsequittor. Just

transition

>> every now and then. Hey, why don't black

women breastfeed chocolate milk? And you

have no place else to put that that

thought, right? So, it's a a stream of

things that make you go h

>> Yeah. Yeah.

>> Well, it was just finally there was a

different kind of talk show. It was like

finally there was a talk show that was

more fun. Hey, the the desk thing. Um,

my partner and executive producer Mara

Keel Brown, we were sitting around one

day and she said after coming to

America, I had done the Joan Rivers

thing. I filled in for her for 11 weeks

and I think she uh her husband committed

suicide and she was going through all

that period, right? Conan's creating the

Wilton North report in the room that I

leave and I go to Paramount and she

says, "I'm asking you one thing." She

said, "I watched you do standup the

other night at the comedy store, and

there is a freedom that you have that I

would like you to have on the talk show,

and I don't think we can have it with

that desk between you and the guest. So,

I want you to just try without the

desk." And um I tried it without the

desk and never went back.

>> Yeah, you changed it. I mean, like, and

then George Lopez did No Desk when he

did his show. Mh.

>> A few people have tried the no dust

thing.

>> Yeah.

>> But

>> for us, I think it's great. And And you

know what? I was able like somebody like

Rosie Perez, who would be nervous,

>> I'd hold her hand

>> and you can't reach across the desk and

and hold somebody's hand.

>> Well, also the desk was always elevated.

>> Oh, yeah. You want to be

>> was always above the guest.

>> We must be higher,

>> which is weird.

>> Well, that's that's a bizarre. I don't

know if that's the ego of the

entertainer or whether that's some

asskissing prop

uh set designer move because

we always wanted to be higher and I

remember they put something under my

seat. So

>> make your seat higher.

>> Yeah. So I'm sitting even with Kareem,

you know, which is [ __ ]

you know.

Yeah. It's a weird thing. It's like why

would the host be above movie stars like

and rock stars and

>> why? That doesn't make any sense at all.

>> Yeah. Unless your host is David Bowie.

>> Yeah. Right.

>> Right.

>> Unless he decides to do a talk show. And

even then it doesn't make any sense.

It's like if you want to have a

conversation the way you did it was the

best way to do it. Just be sitting

there.

>> Yeah.

>> Sitting with each other, you know.

>> And now

>> you can lean in.

>> Oh yeah.

>> Yeah. You could you could touch the

person, you could poke the person. Uh

>> now we have a different era where

everyone can do talk. I saw Mike Eps

talking on his back from his bed the

other day holding his phone above him.

And that's when it hit me. It's like now

we have a hard time finding a guest that

doesn't have a show,

>> right?

>> We can anyone can have a show now.

>> Yeah.

>> And that's kind of cool.

>> It is kind of cool. And it's just like

and you find your as long as you do it

long enough and you put the right

attention to it and do it honestly,

you'll find your own lane. You find your

own way of doing things.

>> I have friends who have children who

have shows,

>> makeup tutorials and successful things

going on in their bedroom.

>> One of the biggest shows on YouTube for

a long time was a kid that was like

unboxing toys.

>> Oh, that's cool. And it was sort of, but

then they started monetizing it. And I

think, you know, soon as your parents

start making all that money off of you

opening toy boxes, [ __ ] gets weird. It's

weird for kids to get famous, period.

But but it was just like no one had

thought that out like that. There would

be a lot of people that were interested

in you watching toys.

>> Yeah. Yeah.

>> Like there's a lot of shows that I watch

on YouTube that it's just people

cooking.

>> Oh, yeah.

>> I just I love watching people cook.

Watch a lady cook with big titties and

and uh uh just an apron, you know, and

you know, side boobage be coming out.

>> That's a trick. She's tricking you. I

like watching people cook with no

talking. It's just ASMR, you know, just

they're like chopping up the food and

you hear the sizzle in the pan and like

it's I don't know why I like it. I love

I love watching people do things. Isn't

it amazing that you're younger than I

am, but when I was growing up in

Cleveland, we had three channels,

>> right? I remember those days.

>> Yeah. And and and the [ __ ] signed off at

two, right?

>> Yeah. You da

da

>> and you fall asleep watching TV and that

would wake you up.

>> Yeah. Cuz it would be just crackling

like, "Oh jeez, I stayed up too late."

>> You have to shut it off after the

American flag because the American flag

would wave

>> on the TV, right?

>> Yeah. There would be a a match fade from

a soldier to the American flag.

>> Yeah. And then it would just go static

at 2 in the morning. And then I remember

when Fox came out and everybody's like,

"This channel is crazy."

>> Yeah.

>> Foxes, they have the Simpsons and M.

>> They changed my life, man. th those uh

Tracy Alman

>> and then of course

>> they discovered that they could get

numbers with me and Living Color

>> and uh Fox was really important to us.

Fox was important to America. I mean it

was it was a looser, wilder network. It

was like a network that was a little

crazier.

>> Like they were doing things that they

were getting nuts

>> and they had to they had to take some

chances and roll the dice in a different

way,

>> right? Yeah. And then cable came along.

It was like the slow descent into

madness.

>> Yeah. Yeah.

>> And then all a sudden you have 150

channels and now you have like literally

an infinite number of channels because

of streaming and YouTube. It's like you

can never run out of things to look at.

Which is crazy because I turn a lot and

I'm like, "Yo, [ __ ] They got

two million stations and you channel

chasing. You can't find something." But

I'm a big YouTube guy because I I don't

like commercials. I want what I want and

I want it in small increments. I

actually, as a 70-year-old, fit more

into this culture than I did the culture

I was born into. I

>> I like things for three minutes. It's

It's [ __ ] me up, too. You know, I I

don't want long [ __ ] I want quick [ __ ]

>> And uh I'm jumping around. Well, when

I'm watching TV, I'm I'm generally

trying to check out, you know, or I'm

trying to be educated, right? So, either

I'm watching some um like particle

physicist talk about the the way they

find new particles by using particle

colliders and large hadron colliders and

the amount of energy required to

duplicate the, you know, the conditions

that happened right after the big bang.

You know, I'm just like,

>> I I watch a lot of that [ __ ] and then I

just watch people play pool.

>> I watch people play pool and I watch,

you know, people make furniture and

people cook. I I'm just trying to like

unwind.

>> Yeah.

>> I'm just trying to like relax.

>> But that's so heavy. I heard you and Cat

talking about the pyramids.

>> Mhm.

>> And um as a matter of fact, it was part

of the reason I was afraid to come here

because I've heard you talk about the

reexplosion of

it's just when you hear that kind of

[ __ ] and you're like,

>> I don't want to be here. It's like [ __ ]

crazy, huh?

I don't want to be that guy, you know?

So, it it's intimidating to watch

intelligent people have an exchange and

say, "I got to go there."

>> Is it?

>> Oh, yeah.

>> Well, I I guess

>> you don't want You don't want to be the

first idiot in the room. Nobody

>> Oh, you definitely wouldn't be the first

idiot on this show.

>> And you're not an idiot anyway. But if

there's been plenty of really [ __ ]

dumb people on this show that were

great,

>> but do you know somebody that is really

intelligent and conversation with them

is intimidating?

>> Oh, sure.

>> So, I was afraid of this room. I I mean

I know people like Bill Clinton.

>> The first time I sat and talked to Bill

Clinton, not on the air or the second

time I guess I should say.

>> It was kind of daunting because

he no matter what your politics is, he's

a really smart guy. Yeah. Cat Williams

is the same way. That [ __ ] read

a lot more books than I read.

>> Well, Cat's brilliant. I mean, you can't

be that funny and not be very

intelligent.

>> It's the reason Bill Cosby was so funny.

He was a bright man.

>> Uh

>> oh. I got

something.

>> He's just He just That's a problematic

subject.

>> Was also Bill Clinton. I wish Bill

Clinton didn't have so many problems

because I would like to talk to him. I

would love to have to sit down with him

on a podcast. You know, the problem is

like how do you sit down and not talk

about all the chaos and all the nutty

[ __ ] and the Epstein files and all the

other [ __ ] Like you kind of almost have

to talk about it. So, it's too bad

>> because I think he's a fascinating

person and I think he's one of the

greatest presidents of all time for

sure. And if you go back and look at

what he accomplished during his

administration, they balanced the

budget. There was like one of the first

times in the history of this [ __ ]

country that we didn't have a gigantic

debt. Now our debt's like 39 trillion.

>> It's crazy. Everybody's so bad at

balancing the budget. And you go back

and listen to him talk when he was

running for president. He's like super

sensible. Like everything he said made

sense.

>> And didn't he move a little to the

right?

>> Well, I mean it wasn't to the right. It

was just sensible. Like what is to the

right and what is to the left?

>> It's accepting that

a lot of things are valuable that are

not a part of your party's philosophy. I

think we have to be willing

>> to compromise and move a little bit. Uh

and and that goes for all politicians.

We have to be able to move a little bit

to be logical and serve all of America

>> for sure. But I think the problem is

parties all have to agree and they then

they form ideologies that you cannot

stray from. So if you're one of those

people that says like hey maybe an open

border is a bad idea because terrorists

can come through like

no there's no one's illegal on stolen

land. You know you get everybody gets

crazy because there's a party line that

you have to stick with. This is today.

Today things are incredibly polarizing.

But if you go back and listen to some of

the things that Clinton was saying when

he was running for president and when he

was president, boy, these are like

almost right-wing talking points in a

lot of ways. But they're not but it's

not right. But it's not really

rightwing. It's just sensible. Like what

is right and what is left? Left used to

be um first of all, freedom of speech

was of paramount importance. It used to

be that they were very open-minded. It

used to be like the that education was

of crucial importance and that discourse

was crucially important and that you

have to look out for citizens and in

sense of like having social safety nets

and having welfare programs and and food

stamps and all those things are which

are really important for a society

because not everybody is in the same

position in life. And if we're a

community of people, which is what a

country is supposed to be, you're

supposed to look out for everyone. You

know, that that's sensible. That's what

the left used to be. And then it became

trans women or women. Men can get

pregnant.

>> And by the way, when you deal with left

and right, you have to almost attach a

year because we've seen parties

change. Um

I'm always reminded that the Democratic

Party was the party of the clan. if you

go far enough back.

>> So, I'm I'm a Republic. I have to look

at it all.

>> But wasn't Lincoln a Republican?

>> Um,

>> I believe Lincoln was a Republican. I

think the Republicans were the ones who

were trying to abolish slavery.

>> There was a a lot of there's a lot of

weird things that shift back and forth

and that you you think of right-wing and

leftwing in today's standards. Like we

were playing a clip of Hillary Clinton

the other day when she was running for

president. I think it was was it 2008 or

2012?

>> 8 when she was she was running for

president. She's like if you're here

illegal from another country, you should

have to pay a stiff penalty. You should

have to learn English and if you have

any criminal history whatsoever, no

questions asked. You get out of the

country. And everyone was cheering like

the lady's MAGA. That sounds completely

MAGA. That's why I say when you deal

with Democrat, Republican, you have to

attach a year because it's evolved and

changed many times.

>> Well, it's all you're just being

manipulated and you're being manipulated

by these two teams and you have to pick

a team. You have to decide which team

are you on.

>> I hate that.

>> It's so stupid. I'm politically

homeless. I've always been politically

homeless for a long [ __ ] time. It

neither one of them make any sense to

me. We need like a logical centrist

government that like just says there's a

lot of things that we should do to make

this country a better place. We can we

can do these things and we don't have to

attach them to left or right and

anything that the left says that's

logical to people on the right. They

immediately dismiss it because it's

coming from the left. And that happens

the same with where the left does it to

people on the right. It's dumb. It's a

it's a team thing. It's like the

Dolphins versus the Raiders. It's just

you pick a [ __ ] team and you team a

horrible game, by the way.

>> You pick a team and your team rules and

the other team sucks. And there's a lot

of people out there that are not that

they're not open-minded and they love a

good rigid ideology that they could

adhere to. So now I don't have to think

for myself. I have a predetermined

pattern of opinions that I could just

adopt and I'll just accept those and

that's how I think and that's what I'm

going to argue with.

When I was young, I used to

in some jokes say, "My my heart is

Democratic, but my wallet is Republican,

you know." But it's not even that simple

anymore. It's gotten much more

complicated.

>> Yeah. Much much more complicated. It's

like, you know, everyone should be

anti-fraud whether you're on the left or

on the right.

>> Unless you're committing fraud,

>> right?

>> Then, you know, then I'm pro me.

>> Yeah. Well, I think a lot of people

that, you know, are certainly benefiting

from fraud would like to dismiss it,

whether it's the left or the right.

Yeah. There's like

>> we have a problem in this country where

we have a two-party system. Two-party

systems are inherently flawed because

there's no [ __ ] way that one side is

going to represent you entirely. And

it's much more likely if you have like

five, 10, 15 different parties that are

all legitimate because we don't have

another legitimate party. If you vote

for libertarian, and I've voted

libertarian before, you're basically

saying, "Fuck these people."

>> You know, [ __ ] these people. I'm voting

>> You're jacking up the Dolphin Raider

game.

>> Yeah.

>> I'm voting for rugby.

>> That's what you're basically saying.

You're like, I can't get behind either

one of these [ __ ] so I'm going

to vote for this guy who has no chance,

>> you know? And I've done that before. I

did that with Joe Jorgensson. I did that

with Gary Johnson. I voted for both of

them. But why do you think we've not

been able to come up with legitimate

third, fourth, and fifth parties?

>> Well, they got it locked down. They've

got it locked down

>> with donations and money.

>> Yeah. It's money. Money and politics.

When they got when they allowed

corporations to just essentially give as

much as they feel like it like and when

corporations

>> and not not just corporations, but other

countries.

>> This episode is brought to you by Better

Help. A lot of people hit stretches

where money gets tight. And it's not

just the bills. It's the constant

pressure, the mental load, the second

guessing of every decision. And

honestly, one of the biggest difference

makers isn't some perfect budget. It's

having a solid support system when

things feel heavy. And if that support

system includes therapy, even better.

Because while it can't solve your money

problems, it can change your

relationship with finances. It can help

you manage the stress, anxiety, and

maybe even any shame you feel around

money. A good place to find a quality

therapist is BetterHelp. Plus, they do a

lot of the work for you. Literally, all

you need to do is answer a few questions

and BetterHelp will match you with a

fully qualified therapist online. They

have an industry-leading match

fulfillment rate, which is a fancy way

of saying that they typically get it

right the first time. But even if they

don't, it's super simple to switch to

another therapist. When life feels

overwhelming, therapy can help. Sign up

and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/jre.

That's betterhp.com/jre.

Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's not good. It's

not good. Money in politics is the real

problem. You know, it should, you know,

the whole thing. It's a mess. And then

you find out how much money politicians

make

>> while the TSA guys have nothing.

>> Yeah.

>> And politicians are still getting a

[ __ ] check.

>> Yes. Exactly. Well, I felt that way also

about the lockdowns in California. I was

like, all these people that are saying

that you should have no outdoor dining,

your paycheck should be entirely

dependent on the GDP of your city. And

if your city starts suffering, you

should [ __ ] suffer. And I guarantee

you want those businesses to open right

the [ __ ] back up because it didn't make

any sense. They were doing things for

optics only. And they were doing things

because they like control. People love

control. They love it. And once you give

them power over people, they're in the

control business. They like to keep that

control. And it just gets gross. And

they don't have any there's no

repercussions. They don't get in trouble

if all these like California lost.

>> Somebody should be in trouble for the

Epstein fouls. somebody.

>> At least one person, please.

>> Yes. It's crazy that we're sitting

around looking at that.

>> It's crazy

>> and we know it and we say it, but ain't

a [ __ ] thing we can do about

it,

>> right? It's like right now there's some

talk about journalists getting in

trouble for leaking information about

the down pilot and that they want to

prosecute these journalists. At the same

time, no one's being prosecuted for the

Epste files.

>> Yeah,

>> that's nuts. That's a sick society.

>> As a kid, I did magic, right? And

there's a thing in magic, I take a coin

and put in this hand, there's a thing

called misdirection. That's what I just

did to you. You looked at that and I'm

doing some [ __ ] right here. That's the

story of American politics.

>> Oh yeah. Whenever something weird's

going on, look, when Monica Lewinsky,

when when Trump when Bill Clinton got

caught with Monica Lewinsky, they may

start bombing some other countries.

Like, we got to distract these people.

This is just too complicated. Yeah,

>> look, the Epstein Files comes out. We go

to war with Iran. It's It's a good way

to get people to stop talking about

certain things. You give them a new

problem to think about.

>> Hey, this morning I wake up in a very

nice hotel, thanks to you. Uh, breakfast

was paid for, the tip was done, all that

[ __ ] It was kind of cool. Um,

and I was nervous and I'm thinking, I'm

nervous

to go see my guy and talk, which is

insane. But then, you know, sometimes

you try to focus on why you're really

nervous. Why am I so nervous? And I

realized it wasn't just coming here. I

had watched about a half hour of news

and it was making my stomach hurt, you

know, because I I feel so sad on a lot

of levels, you know,

>> and anxiety.

>> Yes. Yes.

>> News just gives me anxiety.

>> But I got to as a comic, I got to watch

cuz I got to know everything. I got to

have that that that mental rolodex

loaded.

>> Yes. for crowd work or whatever.

>> Well, you have to know what's going on

in the world. Unfortunately, if I wasn't

a comic, I would have no social media. I

would never consume the news. I would

just hide.

>> Yeah.

>> I would just like go to a peaceful

place. I'd probably have a place in the

mountain somewhere and just [ __ ]

chill.

>> I would not want to have anything to do

with any of this [ __ ] that's going

on in the world. And I know people, a

lot of people say, "Oh, you have to

participate and this and that." Like,

man, yeah, I guess. But I don't think

your participation is having the kind of

effect that you'd like it to have. I

think it's having an effect on the way

you think and feel much more so like a

disproportionate effect on your mental

health and your anxiety levels and all

these different things that you cannot

control by paying attention to it. You

can't control what these [ __ ] people

are doing. And it just drives you nuts.

And

>> it's frustrating because we realize I

mean you and I are both millionaires.

You a lot more than me. Uh but at the

same time we realize we don't have

enough money to really affect it. I mean

you

>> you can affect some things I guess.

>> Yeah. I now that I think about

>> I don't want to I don't want to affect

if I can affect things in a positive way

I can. Yeah. I mean there's some things

like

>> things by by dispersing information of

candidates and in helping to inform

people. But but that kind of money that

you have to have to have a dinner in

Malibu and uh and later get some [ __ ]

done that you want to get done cuz the

president is your guy now.

>> Yeah.

>> Or girl.

>> It's very complicated.

>> Yeah.

>> Very. And then that kind of complication

comes with a lot of scrutiny, a lot of

weirdness. And and also like you don't

really know these people. You you you

support people like for running for

president or governor or mayor,

whatever. How do you how much do you

know them? Are you really sure that you

is this like is there no good option? So

you go with the least evil option?

>> Well, a lot of us do that and that's

that's really painful to think that the

lesser of two evils is a horrible thing

as a philosophy for a place we raise our

children,

>> right? Yeah. There's no one person that

really comes along. You're like,

"Finally, like a peaceful, God-loving

person who's just looking out for

everybody's best interest, who really

only wants to do this cuz they think

they can affect change." And then once

they do try to affect change, they get

[ __ ] shot cuz cuz nobody really wants

that because they're all making money.

>> When we were coming up, remember the Sam

Kenisonson bit?

>> Which bit?

>> Um I think it was very similar to that

people who have an idea, we kill them.

>> Oh, that was Bill Hicks.

>> Oh, it was Hicks.

>> Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Hicks. Hicks had a great bit about that.

Yeah. And it's totally true.

>> I mean, anybody that really wants to

rock the apple cart, like that that

person's a problem,

>> you know? And all these people that are

making, look at these sociopaths that

are making [ __ ] billions of dollars

just being [ __ ] Like they do not want

you coming along and waking people up to

that and saying, "Hey, we should put a

stop to all this. We should, you know,

we should stop these people from like

that's why people cheered when that guy

got shot. The United Healthcare guy,

>> he got shot. People were happy. They

were happy. Like finally,

>> at first I thought it was I thought

homie who shot him. I thought it was his

eyebrows, you know, cuz women were going

crazy, you know?

>> He's a hot guy. He's a good-looking guy,

too. He's like perfect guy to to be like

a martyr, like an assassin.

>> By by the way,

have you noticed throughout history,

good-looking people get treated

differently when it comes to the justice

system? They've done experimental trials

where the hot guy gets off on for

murder. Easy cuz the 11 women were cool

with it, you know.

>> Well, women are weird with killers, you

know. When guys are even serial killers,

when they go to jail, women like

>> they get great letters proposals.

>> Weird. Marry me.

>> Yeah. Even like Richard Ramirez was

getting all these proposals while he was

in jail. But the ultimate game for a

woman is to be married but not have to

live with that [ __ ] you know?

So that might be kind of cool, you know,

>> kind of. I don't know what it is. Um I I

heard someone talk about that saying

that there's women that like men that

are capable of killing

>> because

back in the day it was if someone was if

you needed someone to protect you, you

didn't you didn't want someone that

would hesitate if they were going to

kill someone. You wanted someone who has

experience killing people.

>> So it's almost like an attractive trait

that someone's willing to cross that

terrible line

>> and just has no problem murdering

people. And if they like you, they won't

murder you, but they'll murder other

people. Like anybody, that's a problem.

>> I knew a girl who went out with a couple

friends of mine. And her MMO was to do

something publicly that would make the

man whip somebody's ass to defend her

honor or something.

>> Oh,

>> and she because that that made her feel

>> better.

>> That's a crazy [ __ ] I've been around

people like that before. I always got

rid of them real quick. I've had a few

ladies like that when

>> you gonna let him say that to me, you

know,

>> I'd be like, "Why'd you say that to

him?" The [ __ ] Don't get me involved in

this stupid [ __ ]

>> But it's hard, man. I was in a club as a

young man on Sunset. Left the comedy

store, went down the street to a place

called Carlos and Charlie's. And back

then, they had uh this garment called a

tube top.

>> It was just an elastic

>> about elastic piece about 8 in or

depending on your breast. And um I

watched a dude take his finger and just

pull the girl's tube top down. Titties

fell out. And I'm watching her man. He

didn't know what to do, you know,

because you don't want to fight these

guys.

>> You almost want to just say, "Baby, just

pull up your top. Let's go home." You

know, but he had to fight.

>> Yeah.

>> And uh in that situation, I I think you

have to fight.

>> You just definitely shouldn't be there

in the first place. That's the problem

with going to clubs.

>> You're the wrong club.

>> They're running into the potential

psychopath

>> is just too like that's where they go

where people act like [ __ ] That's

where they go.

>> When is the last time you went to a

club?

>> I never go to clubs.

>> Yeah. It's been a long time for me. I

mean there is no club for 70 year olds.

>> No. No. No.

>> You know that's called ARP.

>> Well, if you do go, it's sad. If you

>> Yeah. You don't want to be the oldest at

the bar.

>> Yeah.

>> Hey ladies, what is [ __ ] grandpa

doing here? But but are do kids dance

now?

>> That's a good question.

>> My my son has has like I remember a time

when you say I'm doing the cabbage patch

now. You know it's like you knew what

the latest dance was. My son never

dances. I've taken him to New Year's Eve

parties. He never during the slow record

says to a girl you want to dance. You

know, you go out and slow dance. What

happened to that [ __ ]

>> That's that's true. Right. Well, because