Could you tell the story of finding your

birth certificate?

>> Oh god. Yeah. Wow. I'd gotten home from

school. How old were you at that time?

>> 11. I was 11. And mom had kept in her

closet like a crown royal bag that was

full of coins. But she always put it in

different places cuz we were always cuz

when I was going, you know, you had the

concession stand at school. For a

quarter you could get a candy bar back

then or like 10 cents you could get a

Coke.

>> Just so people can put you in space.

Where were you at the time? in

Louisiana, a little town, Stark,

Louisiana, where I grew up. A little

farming community. It's just a caution

light in a cotton gin. That's where I

grew up. And so I was looking for the

little bag, trying to find some quarters

or something to go buy a candy bar at

the store or something. And I found the

bag and there was a box right next to

it. I opened the box and right on top

was my birth certificate.

And I didn't think much of it and I

started looking at it and I saw McGraw

where it had a line had been drawn

through it and right above it written by

hand in pencil was Smith which was my

stepdad's name and then it said dad's

occupation professional baseball player

and of course of being 11 years old and

growing up you know sort of we were like

low low middle class and you know didn't

have any money and seeing something like

that it was just so hard to register. It

didn't seem real. And oddly enough, I

had three baseball cards on my wall in

my room. His was one of them cuz he was

one of my favorite players.

>> Hug.

>> Yeah. So, I instantly called my mom and

I could tell that it hit her like a ton

of bricks. She was at work and I'm like,

"Mom, what is this my birth certificate?

What does this mean?" And then she was

like, "Oh my god." That's all she said.

And she said, "I'll be right home." And

then she came home and we went for a

ride and she told me the whole story.

>> What was the story?

>> Her junior summer in high school and um

her mom had just left her dad, my

grandpa, and they were staying

in a motel

that had a outdoor a pool with outdoor,

you know, like a motorc court motel that

my grandmother and my mom were staying

there. It just so happened that the

minor league team, Jacksonville Suns,

minor league team for the Mets, all the

ball players were staying in that hotel

as well. So Tug and my mom met at the

pool and sort of dated over the summer.

And uh when he left, got called up or

whatever, left, she found out she was

pregnant.

My mom was a dancer and she had just

gotten invited to to try out for Where

the Action Is by Dick Clark, which was

like his first show, the precursor to

American Band, and all that stuff. So,

my mom had just gotten a letter inviting

her to audition for it. And she had just

found out she was pregnant with me. And

then I have her senior portrait that she

took that they always take at the

beginning of the senior year. And she

had just found out two days before the

senior portrait she was pregnant with

me. And every time I look at that

portrait, I can see it in her eyes. I

can see that her whole future had just

disappeared in front of her.

And um she told me the whole story and

said that um she hadn't talked to him

since

and hasn't heard from him. And I said,

"But I'd like to meet him, you know." So

she got in touch with his lawyer somehow

or his his agent somehow.

and he was still playing at the time and

they arranged somehow mom borrowed a car

from her boss and some money from her

boss. He said he would leave tickets for

us and have lunch with us.

And um we drove there,

he met us for lunch, we talked for a

little while

and he just said, "You know, I'm not

your dad. I don't think I'm your dad,

but we can be friends kind of deal." and

went to the game. I had a Pete Rose

magazine where Pete Rose was about to

break the hitting record that I brought

with me and he took me in the clubhouse

and Pete Rose signed that. So, I got to

meet Pete Rose. Got to throw the ball a

little bit with some of the guys for

batting practice and my mom had got me a

McGraw shirt made and a Phillies hat and

all that stuff. So, she had me all

decked out. We met, never saw him after

the game or anything. Never heard from

him again. So, of course, I was obsessed

as an 11-year-old kid would be about

something like that.

>> Could I pause you for one second? What

were the emotions that you felt at the

time? Was there anger? Was there

confusion? Was there admiration? What

was the mixture of emotions that you

felt?

>> I think at the time, I don't think there

was anger. I think there was some

affirmation

in it because we grew up in a very

dysfunctional life. The guy who I

thought was my dad growing up was an

alcoholic and very abusive to my mom and

to me. And then the second stepdad was

was worse than the first one. So we grew

up in really

scary, you know, the commercial you see

now when

footsteps are coming home and kids are

scared. That's the way our house was

when you'd hear the truck drive up. So

for me, there was an affirmation of why

I felt like I didn't belong

with with that guy.

So it wasn't a confusion. I I don't

think I was young enough to register

confusion. I think it was more certainly

it was more about the excitement of

finding out that your dad's a

professional baseball player and

certainly in the circumstances that I

was growing up in. So for me it was sort

of a ray of light in a lot of ways.

So the next year they were playing in

Houston again and I asked mom if I could

go see the game again. She got in touch

with the agent again said he would leave

two tickets but he's not going to see

us. So he left two tickets and then in

it was in Houston which was the only

time I'd seen him play. Cut to the first

time I saw him play. He came in and gave

up a grand slam [laughter]

the first time I saw him play. But the

bullpin is right along right by the

stands. I mean, the stands are to that

desk where the bullpin is

>> 10, 12 ft away.

>> Yeah. You're right there. He wouldn't

see us before the game or anything. So,

he was warming up in the bullpin and my

mom says, "Why don't you go down and say

hi to him? He's warming up in the

bullpin." So, I walked down to where he

was warm up and I was as close to me and

you as you were to him and he's warming

up. Something's yelling at him. Tug,

it's Tim. Tug. And he wouldn't look at

me. He wouldn't look at me or

acknowledge me. And so, I just sort of

dropped it for that. Went back home. I

didn't use McGra. Smith just sort of

forgot about it. Didn't forget about but

not even only a handful of my friends

even knew about it.

I didn't tell very many people about it

sort of. Then I got embarrassed I think

after after that that I was just like

sort of thrown away. What happened? What

changed?

>> Well, when I was 18 graduating high

school, we didn't have any money for

college.

I was counting on sports scholarships

and I had a few but I was small. I

graduated high school. I was 510 barely

and 140 pounds and you know getting

football scholarships and basketball

scholarships thinking this probably

going to work out when I get to the next

level at my size. She was going to call

about paying for college if she could

see if he would pay for college. This is

a long story. She was going to see if

he'd pay for college. So,

>> we got plenty of time.

>> I was staying out of it. I, you know, I

was too busy with my life. And then I

remember the last high school football

game getting ready. I'm down on the

field getting ready for the game to

start. We'd already ran through the

banner and done all that stuff. And

somebody taps me on the shoulder and it

was my mom. I'm on the sidelines getting

ready to go out and play. I'm like,

"Mom, [laughter] what are you doing

here? You know, we're about to play a

game. You can't be down here on the

sidelines." She goes, "Well, I heard

from Tug's lawyer today." And I said,

"Okay, Mom. Can we wait till after the

game? we get home to to talk about this.

So, played the game, got home, and we

talked a little bit about it, and then

we talked about the next morning. And

the deal was they'd sent a contract.

They said that he would pay $300 a year

towards my college and that I would

never be able to contact him again. And

if I did, money would anyway, $300 a

year for college and you can't contact

me anymore.

And that to me was enough to say, you

know what, fine.

My only request, I said, I don't I don't

even need the money. $300 a month, it's

not going to do anything. I don't need

the money. Don't need anything. My only

request is that he has to meet me with

me one last time.

And then if he wants me to sign a

contract to leave him alone, I'll do

whatever. And so we drove to Houston. He

had retired at this point. And I just

graduated high school, so I was as tall

as him. And we walked into the hotel and

mom said, "Well, there's Tug standing

checking in over there and he had

somebody with him who was his lawyer/

agent." So I walked over to him and

tapped him on the shoulder and he turned

around and looked at me and said, "I

tug, I'm Tim." Cuz he hadn't seen me

since I was 11. And and I introduced

myself to the guy standing next to him.

And the guy standing next to him turned

completely white because I looked just

like him. So he knew that the [laughter]

gig was up.

>> The gig was up.

>> So we sort of spent the day together

hanging out a little bit and then we

went to dinner that night. He, mom and

I. And then there was a there was a

point during dinner, just small talk,

where I asked mom if she could leave us

alone and let us talk for a minute. And

of course, mom didn't want to do that.

And I assured her that I I had this.

This was fine. And as soon as she left,

I just looked at Tug and said, "Look,

I'll I'll sign your contract. I'll never

talk to you again.

I won't bother you. I just have one

question for you. And I asked him, "Do

you think you're my dad?"

And he says, "Yes, I I believe I am."

And he said, "We'll tear the contract

up." And then I didn't hear from him for

a year [laughter] after that.

But [snorts] after that, we ended up

starting to see more of each other. and

me going while I was in college, I would

drive up to Philly and visit and got to

know my little brother Mark and my

little little sister Carrie, which was

great to come out of that. But I always,

this is what I'll get back to at the end

of the day,

I get asked a lot, and you said it

right, a lot of people now don't know

the story. They knew it at the beginning

of my career, but a lot of people that

know my career now that know who my dad

was, they think that I grew up in that

world, and I didn't. So, I'm glad we're

talking about this because a lot of

people can understand now that I didn't

grow up in that world. But the long and

short of it is when people ask, "How

could you have anything to do with your

dad? How could you have not hated him?

How could you have just not turned your

back on him?" My answer always is, "He

gave me something

that was so precious,

and that was hope."

>> Whether he meant to and he didn't, or

knew it, or any of those things, he gave

me a reason to think that I can get out

of the situation that I was in. that if

he can do that, then I have it in me to

do something. And so for that reason

alone, I couldn't hate him.

>> Hope, man. Yeah. That is just

>> it's a bedrock of

everything else. If everything else is

gone, if you got hope, you can you got

you still got a chance.