The unthinkable has happened. I know.

I'm about to report something that I

think has never happened before.

Microsoft

released a bad update. Yes, but this

update was so bad that simple things

like the Windows button just wouldn't

work. By the way, I also want to say the

person who made this video, Vim,

man of culture right there. Okay, just

want to let you know, a man of culture.

Also, just black screens of death. Oh,

yes, you've you've heard about blue

screens. These ones are worse. And of

course, everybody's favorite program,

Notepad. Yes, Notepad is currently not

available in your account. How did you

screw up Notepad? It's simpler than

Nano. How did you do this, Microsoft?

Anyways, let's go over this little fun

patch. Let's have a good old laugh at

Microsoft and their non-stop pursuit of

making the world's best case for Linux.

So, this all started January 13th, 2026.

You know, just a simple cumulative

update for Windows 11 version 25H2 and

24H2 KB5074109

includes the latest security fixes and

improvements along with nonsecurity

updates from last month's optional

preview release. Well, I mean, who

wouldn't want to put that in their

system? So, yeah. So, everything ended

up breaking. We're talking about so many

apps wouldn't launch and this this

little Windows just being smashed and

nothing happened. It just kind of hurts

me because there was a day a long time

ago when you would be able to take

Windows, press enter, boom, it just

launched. Look at this. Look at how fast

that is. That's Microsoft Word launching

in a fraction of a second, maybe 75 of a

second. And this is from a Pentium 400

megahertz still on like one of those

disc platter drives. It had to like read

to get the actual memory. And this thing

launches so fast. in the newest window

can't even open up the start menu

without just freezing. Hey, Satia here.

We're here to revolutionize the business

world. You just don't understand it yet.

True, I understand that's your goals and

your purpose, but then answer me this

one, Satia. Why is Anthropic being

better than you? I mean, you've been

making non-stop updates to the operating

system, putting co-pilot in everything.

Anthropic just drops Claude for Excel

instantaneously better. [laughter]

Like I mean you have to feel like a

loser at this point and with the amount

of errors that you have. I just have to

feel bad. Like this meme it's not even

funny anymore. Like at this point I feel

bad. This was a joke and then the joke

just kept writing itself over and over

again. I have never seen a company so

thoroughly on open source like

Microsoft. I mean they're just truly it

is the year of the Linux desktop 2026.

I'm quite convinced that DHH and Satia

are teaming up to create the greatest

use case of all time. But the real like

the real bad part is this black screen

of death. If you have not seen this,

this is ridiculous. Look at this. So

these little batched rollouts. So this

started January 13th. You would restart

your computer and then it couldn't quite

finish up. Sometimes it was at 35%

because apparently at 35% it's like

handing it off to the uh temporary

installer to do something extra and

sometimes you're just stuck at 0%. That

was on January 13th. It is currently

January 29th and this still is not

fixed. This is the recommendation to fix

the problem. Just uninstall it, bro. And

by the way, when I say that this thing

is still going on, they've already

pushed two outofband updates, not their

standard updates to fix the problems.

And this has survived. This bug has

survived multiple outofband updates.

Honestly, at this point, I I I actually

I actually just feel bad cuz there's so

many people that are stuck using Windows

that I I I feel like this uh VX

underground guy. Like I just I can't

even Can I even make fun of Windows at

this point? Like is it is it kind of

just am I punching down now at this

point? Is that is that what this is? Am

I making fun of the little guy? You know

what the honestly the worst part about

this whole thing is? Is that I don't I

don't even think this is some sort of

like failure because of AI. I mean, I

get it. We all Dude, I love this

skeleton. This is like my favorite meme

that just keeps on going and going. I

honestly I'm not even convinced that

this is a real thing. First off, that

whole 30%. Honestly, people that are

using Copilot or any sort of just like

inline autocomplete, oh yeah, 30% of

your code is written by AI. It's like,

oh, okay. Yeah, okay. Yeah, sure. That's

kind of like, you know, game in the

metrics. I'm not even convinced that

stuff is even true or even to blame for

all this. Honestly, this is just a

massive failure of leadership. And it I

mean it's incidentally involving AI and

constantly pursuing the latest and

greatest technology as opposed to just

making their system good. Constantly

shoving in all these updates in places

that don't need to be like why why are

we actually putting AI in notepad? How

about this one? Crazy idea. Microsoft,

you give me five releases. Okay, I want

five months, five releases, no bugs.

Then you can have AI. Okay. Hey, I I'll

give it to you. Okay, that's that's it.

That's the deal we're going to strike

right here, right now. You give us 5

months of just quietness. I don't even

want to hear the word Windows, you can

put AI in notepad. Until then, why are

they doing this? They clearly they're

burning bridges. Clearly, people are

more and more looking to an alternative.

Is it really worth the pursuit of trying

to win this AI war if you just destroy

all user satisfaction? I mean, honestly,

the real heroes here, the ones that

should be getting everybody's praise, is

the fact that the Microsoft sales team

has managed to continue just putting up

numbers in enterprise and government

even with all this. Like somehow they go

into a meeting and be like, "Hey, aren't

you like broken since January 13th?"

Yeah, but let me tell you how great

using Microsoft for business is. And

somehow they're able to sell business

after business. These guys, they're

they're legendary. We got I you know

what? Honestly, sales team, you deserve

an award. But at the end of the day,

please stop releasing fixes that involve

breaking Notepad, the simplest program

in the world. And please just fix your

product. I think we're all sick of it.

I'm tired of making videos making fun of

you. It's not even funny anymore,

honestly. It's just a little bit sad.

And I just kind of want to leave you on

this high note, you know? I want to

leave you with something that actually

feels really good. So, I I feel like I

have something really important to show

you. Do you see this? This is a picture

of Satia. I tried to make Grock and

other services make him smile like

William Defoe, but they kept telling me

they can't edit his picture or something

about being a public figure. I don't

know. They wouldn't let me. So instead,

this is the video that Grock made, and I

absolutely hate it. It just makes me so

angry on the inside. I just hate AI

video. At least I hate this AI video.

Just everything about it's awful. So

there you go. All of that upsetness, you

get to enjoy it, too. The name is I wish

I could get a picture of Satia smiling

like William Defoe. It would just it

would make my day. But seriously, have

you tried our co-pilot for Windows? You

could adjust your font size. Hey, is

that HTTP? Get that out of here. That's

not how we order coffee. We order coffee

via SSH terminal.shop. Yeah. You want a

real experience? You want real coffee?

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