Let me tell you something real quick,

bro. There are certain things that you

can do that the extroverts, the popular

people are doing unintentionally

that are allowing them to connect with a

bunch of people that allowing them to

make friends, go to events easy. And

these things, it's not your fault

because you don't know about them. But

in this video, what I'm going to teach

you, when you start doing them, it's

going to be 10 times easier to connect

with people. And people are going to

come up to you and they're going to be

like, "Wait, how did I become friends

with you? How did we meet?" Because

what I'm going to tell you in this video

is not really talked about on the

internet. And you know, you see all

these things. It's like, "Oh, smile in

conversation. Ask people a bunch of

questions. Say their name in

conversation.

Terrible advice.

It's it's easy. It's friendly advice,

but this advice isn't going to get you

connected to people who actually want to

be your friend.

Now, I have a saying in this because

when I was in middle school and high

school, right, my biggest problem was

connecting and making friends. I

remember I would try to be super hyped

up in conversation. I would try to be

friendly, right? But people didn't

really seem to want to talk to me.

People would say a few words and then

quickly go talk to somebody else. And it

was confusing because I didn't want to

be alone. I wanted to make friends, but

I didn't know how to do it. How to how

to behave myself in a way that got me

friends. Say things in a way that got me

friends. And because of this, I started

doing a ton of experimentation. Hundreds

of hours of YouTube videos asking

charismatic people what they do.

Experimentation. And it came down to

these three things that I'm going to

tell you that has skyrocketed the game.

It's easy to talk to people. It's easy

to make connections. It's easy to

have a group of friends, have a

community. And so that's what I'm going

to get into this video and you're going

to start doing these things and it's

going to be 10 times easier. First thing

you can start doing that is probably the

most important thing and the only reason

why people have friends in the first

place, right?

Is for you to simply start doing things

that 90% of the people in your city, in

your country are already doing. Knowing

things that other people already know

about. Having hobbies that most people

in your location are already doing. And

the reason why that is is because if you

do not know what's going on, if you

can't talk about certain topics with

other people, with most people,

then it's going to be harder to connect

with those people. I tell this story all

the time, but when I used to be an

introvert, when I struggle with

connecting with people, making friends

was the exact same time when my life

only revolved around one thing, which

was video games. I used to play a

first-person shooter game called Halo. I

didn't care about school. I didn't care

about sports. I didn't know about any

other topics or hobbies. But because my

life only revolved around that one game,

I was only able to talk to people who

knew about that game.

But that all changed once I started

getting into sports. I started getting

into soccer and I started getting into

MMA.

And once I got into these sports, right,

I noticed that it was easier to talk to

people who played about these sports. It

was easier to talk to people about

fitness because we were doing the same

things. It was easier to talk to

athletes because we were training in the

same way. We started talking about

nutrition, weights, supplements,

sports schedules.

And in this moment, I realized if you

want to connect with people, you need to

start learning about a bunch of

different things that most people are

already doing.

Now, you might be thinking right now,

oh, but there's some things that I don't

like. You know, I don't like I don't

like sports. You know, I don't like

certain music. And I'm not saying you

have to change your complete identity.

But if you had the willingness to just

change and just learn a little bit,

people will appreciate you and talk to

you a little bit about those things.

Right now, for me, it's American

football.

I'm learning a bunch about American

football and in my community right in my

in my friend groups at my 8 80,000

university when people talk about

American football I don't know too much

even though I'm learning about it right

but literally what you can do is simply

just say oh I'm learning about this

topic I'm learning about this could you

tell me more about it

be like bro you should lowkey teach me

and I remember like a couple weeks ago I

was talking to a buddy of mine in a

community and he's a huge American

football guy and I was just like Bro,

I'm actually learning um tell me about

tell me about what a snap is. Tell me

about what the line of scrimmage is.

This is like football terminology,

right? And he started getting excited.

He started telling me a bunch of things.

And I remember after the end of that

conversation,

he was like, "Bro, it's cool you're

learning about this even though you

don't know much. It's so fun for me to

talk about." So, if you don't want to

learn a bunch of different things, you

don't have to become a master at every

single topic or idea.

learn and see and observe

what topics are really done and talked

about in your country, in your city, and

start learning a little bit slowly by

slowly about those things and it'll be

easier for you to talk to about people

because

you're learning about those same things

that most people already do.

Second thing you could start doing is

simply just

saying more statements than questions.

Now, you might be thinking right now,

"Oh, but you're supposed to say a bunch

of questions to the person. Make them

feel acknowledged."

And I'm not saying never ask questions

of people. Please ask questions of

people.

It makes people feel like you're

listening. It makes them feel like

they're important. But let me tell you

something.

The worst thing you can do is go full

all full on interview mode and then have

that other person take advantage

of talking about themselves. Because

when the other person says a bunch of

things about themselves, they're going

to leave that conversation with you and

they're going to be like, "Wait, I

didn't really

learn or get to know about the other

person. They kind of just kept asking me

questions."

And a realization that I've had recently

is that the best conversations

come from not asking questions, but

saying statements.

I remember last year I was joining a

spiritual group and in this group we

went out to eat and there was this guy

who had a Chelsea jersey which is this

London uh European football team and

because I'm a huge European football guy

soccer fan right I was just like bro are

you a Chelsea fan he's just like yeah

and since we met that time all we're

talking about is just sports which also

kind of relates to the first point we're

saying a bunch of statements about

sports asking a little bit of questions

here and there, but that conversation

was so good. And I talked to this guy so

well

because we simply were saying more

statements than questions,

which comes from knowledge, which comes

from just saying what we already know.

So what you can do right if there is a

chance that you have in conversation to

take advantage of saying a bunch of

different things let's say someone asked

you how your weekend was and you had

like this completely you know this film

movie like crazy weekend right tell them

about it go into detail

don't be afraid to say a statement and

ramble a little bit about yourself

because that other person might have

done the same thing they might know

something that you did during that

weekend. They might have something to

say after and they get to know you more

and it's more relatable. Say statements

more than asking questions. Do not make

conversations. A full interview mode.

Third thing you can do that's super

small, but it's going to probably get

you the most social output and get you

by to things is simply asking for social

media every single time you meet someone

new. Now, this might be scary. You might

be be like, "Ah, but I don't know them.

They're not going to give it to But let

me tell you something. There's a way you

can do this that's so chill and you can

literally be like this. Hey, so when I

go out when you know when I'm going to

different places and meeting people, I'm

really trying to connect with every

single person that I talk to. We should

connect on Instagram. You guys have

Instagram. Can I connect with you?

If you say something along these lines,

one, you're going to get their

Instagram, right? And two, it's going to

be like they're going to be like, "Oh,

this guy, he travels. He's he's he's

meeting a bunch of different people. And

so the reason why you want to try to get

some form of social media, right, is

simply because when people have you on

social media, they're more inclined to

invite you to things. I remember my

freshman year, I went to this first

generation student event and there was a

couple people there that I met and there

were two guys. One of them I got his

social media, his Snapchat. The other

guy I didn't. And long story short, the

guy that I had in social media, he ended

up texting me right after because he had

my social media and everything. And

because of that, we actually started

going out more. We went to parties, you

know, we started um having mutual

friends and come. We did a lot during

that first month of college.

But the guy didn't get social media.

I never saw again. And I think to

myself, if I only asked for social media

like the other guy, maybe I would have

still been in contact with him. But when

you add people on social media, when you

get social media, when you get people on

social media and when they see you, text

and inviting is so easy because they

just met you. You know, it's it's a lot

easier. So, ask for social media every

single time you try to meet a person.

Hopefully, those two tips helped. Those

three tips helped you. Like, share,

subscribe, and I'll see you in the next

one. Pace.