I'm Dr. Orion Taban and this is Psych

Hacks Better Living Through Psychology

and the topic of today's short talk is

you are a killer.

This is a very important episode for

people to listen to carefully. I'll

begin by sharing a bit of my own

experience which I will use as a

springboard for actionable advice later

in the episode.

When I was a young man, my mind was a

prison. I was trapped in my mind,

subject to ruthless, unremitting

internal criticism and constrained by

all kinds of programming installed by my

family and my society. In fact, it took

a long time to even recognize the

programming as programming as fish can't

see the water and to understand the

relationship between this programming

and my suffering. Today, I am happy to

report to you that this is no longer the

case. My mind is no longer a prison. In

fact, my mind is now a beautiful garden.

I love being [snorts] inside my mind.

There is peace and quiet and a stable

and abiding sense of freedom. Sounds

nice, right? Well, what you have to

understand is that a garden is not a

natural thing. Gardens do not exist in

nature. Wilderness exists in nature.

Gardens are always the product of

intentional design. And that design, for

lack of a better word, is maintained

through violence.

That's right. All the beauty and

serenity, the pastoral peace of the

garden is created and maintained through

violence.

What must you do to create and preserve

a garden? You must dig up the earth. You

must pull out the weeds. You must kill

the predators and pests that would

devour your crops and blossoms. And you

must maintain this state through

constant vigilance and the willingness

to aggress against that which threatens

your design.

You won't hear many psychologists

talking like this, but it's absolutely

true. If you want a garden, you do not

need to understand the weed. You need to

eradicate it. You do not need to

communicate better with the earth. You

need to break it open. You do not need

to empathize with the pests. You need to

destroy them. You need you live in a

home made of dead trees on land that was

cleared of life so you could lay its

foundations. Whatever comfort or

convenience you enjoy is based on this

fact.

Man must dominate the world to make a

home of it, which is precisely what

dominate means. Like domestic, dominate

comes from the Latin dois meaning home.

This might make people uncomfortable,

but your home is what you have

dominated. And what you have not

dominated is not your home. You must

make your mind bend to your will. You

must dominate it before you can ever

hope to make a home of it. And until you

do, you will be as one living in the

wilderness, uncomfortable,

vulnerable, and subject to any forces

greater than yourself.

But let's take this a step further,

shall we? I told you that my mind was a

prison and that I'm not in prison

anymore. How do you think that happened?

Do you think one day my self-limiting

beliefs and internalized programming got

together and said, "You know what,

Orion? We were just talking and we

decided, well, you've suffered enough.

We're sorry. We're sorry for torturing

you all those years. That wasn't really

cool at all. And I guess our collective

conscience is bothering us now. And we

now have enough pity for your wretched

state that we're going to let you go."

So, um,

sorry about that. We're cool, right? All

the best.

Like, do you think something like that

happened?

Do you think my captors let me go?

My friends, my capttors did not let me

go. I'm free today because I killed

those [ __ ]

And I would do it again. And I will do

it as many times as is necessary to

preserve my freedom. and guarantee my

survival. As God is my witness, I will

never ever again allow those forces to

have dominance over me in my own mind.

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This is the mindset that I want you to

consider adopting. If you're really

serious about improving your

circumstances and building a life worth

living, you have to embrace the reality

that you are a killer. At least in

potentiality, if not yet in fact.

Whatever is holding you prisoner,

whatever self-hatred or internalized

judgment or unfortunate trauma or

incorrect model of reality is destroying

your life, you have to be willing to

fight it and you have to be willing to

kill it. And if you're willing to fight

by any means necessary, you may succeed

in affecting your liberation.

The key is to align with yourself. To

align with yourself against these

psychological jailers, you have to say,

"I deserve to exist. I am alive and I

deserve to [ __ ] live. I deserve to be

free." You sadistic [ __ ] And

you have to say it with conviction. You

have to really mean it. Now, when you

talk like this, will your captors just

let you go? No. No, but it does make

them stand up a little straighter.

Uh, that's not how prisoners are

supposed to talk. Don't you know your

place? Go back to where we want to keep

you. If you behave, maybe we'll

eventually let you out on good behavior.

And I'm here to tell you that that isn't

[ __ ] true. No people in the history

of the world has ever been liberated by

inspiring pity in their capttors,

right?

They liberate themselves when they stand

up, fight back, and say, "Never [ __ ]

again."

And thus begins the work of cultivating

the garden. You must break apart the

earth and destroy the weeds and kill the

pests. There can be no mercy in this

process because your adversaries will

have no mercy for you. You become a

killer. And it's not bloodthirstiness

that drives this. It's not love of

violence. It's a deep abiding respect

for peace.

And it is maintained through the

discipline and sacrifice of the warrior

who would surrender his life before

allowing his garden to succumb.

The individual has the right to

self-determination,

but too much emphasis is paid these days

to political self-determination.

And it is not for people to put the

world to rights before they've succeeded

in restoring order and balance to their

own minds. And unfortunately, the vast

majority of humanity is in chains. Not

physical shackles that manicle their

wrists, but psychological chains that

bind them mentally and spiritually.

These chains are the capttors that

people must depose. Indeed, this might

be the only true duty and responsibility

of the individual.

And if people do not dominate their

minds before seeking to dominate the

world, then they will only succeed in

producing another dystopia. Yet another

bloodbath to exceed the massacre that

came before it. It is an otherwise

endless cycle, and it has devoured

millions and millions of lives. It is

much better to cast off those internal

shackles first, which is good news. as

this act is within the power of most

human beings. But understand your

psychological liberation will not be

granted you any more than your political

liberation will. Your therapist cannot

give it to you. Your priest cannot give

it to you. Your ideology cannot give it

to you. You will have to fight for it

and you will have to be willing to kill

that which would keep you imprisoned.

Real talk. What do you think? Does this

fit with your own experience? Let me

know in the comments below. And please

send this episode to someone who would

benefit from its message. I know you

know someone who needs to hear this. Who

is like trying to make their lives

better but is like stuck in therapy and

endless

podcasts and self-improvement. Like this

is actually what works. Send it to them

as it's word of mouth referrals like

this that really help to make the

channel grow. Other value propositions.

Anyone looking to join my free weekly

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content, no AAI, or book a paid

one-on-one consultation with yours

truly, can find out more on my website.

There's also my books, The Value of

Others, in which I explore my economic

model of relationships, and Starry

Night, my novel, which describes the

final weeks of painter Vincent Van Gogh,

and my private member community, The

Captain's Quarters, where, among other

things, I host bimonthly group

consultation calls with a wonderful

group of people. Check them out. a lot

of great value. The links to everything

are in the description below. As always,

I appreciate your support and thank you

for listening.