You have this ability to become

confident in every single area of your

life. It's about us just learning a new

series of behaviors. For example,

there's something called a siren

technique. In three, two, and why not

eat it as a crazier than usual.

Fantastic. That's fantastic. You did a

great job, right? And then this next one

is volume. So critical. Because if I

just increase my volume and I talk like

this, I sound a little bit aggressive,

don't I? But with volume to highlight

something, you could go very quiet. So

it's about waking people up to the power

of their voice. And we all have access

to these tools. Let's go through all

five. Vin Jang is the award-winning

speaker and communication expert who

helps people harness the power of their

voice and body language in all areas of

their life. Just so overwhelming of how

many people are suffering with not being

able to communicate. They're asking,

"I'm introverted, does that mean that

I'm doomed? How do I become more

confident? How do I speak on the spot?"

And we think there's no way for me to

ever change this. It's super sad because

I lived a massive part of my life like

that. I was the awkward kid. I couldn't

communicate with anyone. I moved schools

so many times cuz I was a bully. But

then I broke them all. And then I just

learned all these new behaviors. Just

completely changed. And anyone can do

this in three to six months. And I'm

going to teach you. So the first thing

that really matters is a three-step

process. I call it record and review.

It's going to dramatically change the

way you talk and the way you show up.

But how do we start a conversation with

another human being? I've got a simple

game called high-low buffalo. And it

gives you three opportunities for a

conversation to spark. We'll play it in

a second. And then there's hand gestures

that level up your physical presence.

And then a simple framework that helps

build connection. There's so many other

things we could talk about. And we're

going to go through them. But some

people do have severe social anxiety.

What do you say to those people? The

first thing I would do is

This has always blown my mind a little

bit. 53% of you that listen to this show

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for you every single week. We'll listen

to your feedback. We'll find the guests

that you want me to speak to, and we'll

continue to do what we do. Thank you so

much.

Then,

if you had to summarize

what it is you do fundamentally and why

you do it, how would you summarize it?

I help people learn that they have

access to one of the most beautiful

instruments in the world that can help

them negotiate whatever reality they

desire.

And I learned this

through

my first ever vocal teacher, Miss

Stanley.

And I'll I'll never forget this

experience.

There's a dingy music corner um in South

Australia, and I would go there for

lessons. And at the first time I met

her, I walked into the room. She's old

lady, and she says nothing to me except

the words, "Sit down, young man." So, I

sit.

It feels super awkward, it feels super

weird.

And then she plays one key non-stop on

the piano for 2 minutes. It's literally

I was like, "Oh [ __ ] this is like

something out of a horror movie." And

then she turns around, she goes, "How do

you feel?"

I said,

"Nothing, weird, awkward, what?" And

then she goes, "Good." Turns around,

plays this beautiful song

called Mariage d'Amour.

Goes on for 2 minutes.

And then she turns around, she goes,

"How do you feel?"

And I said, "Ah, weirded out from before

still, but I feel Wow, that song had

love, there was lust, there was romance,

there was excitement, that" And she

goes, "Good."

"Honey, most people most people go

through life speaking like this.

I'm going to teach you how to speak like

this."

And that's

to me at the time I remember thinking to

myself, "That is the greatest sales

pitch I've ever heard in my life."

Because I'm now going to sign up for 12

classes with you because you've just

helped me realize something I've been

struggling with my entire life. I

haven't been thinking about my voice as

an instrument. I thought it was a tool.

What do you do with a hammer? You use a

hammer. What do you do with a

screwdriver? You use a screwdriver. What

do you do with a piano? You play with

it. What do you do with the violin? You

play with it.

And she started to teach me that I have

this instrument that depending on how I

play it, it changes and shifts how

others feel. How much do you think that

will change the trajectory of someone's

life? Like what is the impact? If I get

really good at communication, do- why

does it matter?

I was invisible my

entire childhood.

I was invisible. I wasn't the cool kid.

I wasn't the good-looking kid. I wasn't

the charismatic kid. I wasn't the funny

kid. I wasn't the anything kid.

And

by learning this skill,

I've been able to negotiate an

incredible reality.

And that's why I love Tim Ferriss so

quite so much. Reality is negotiable.

Cool. Well, what skill do we use to

negotiate the reality we desire? It's

our ability to communicate.

Teaching that to others has been one of

the most fulfilling things I've ever

done.

And I I genuinely believe that makes the

world a better place.

And I will admit sometimes feel like I'm

just here to tune pianos.

I'm here to help people tune and fix and

learn how to play.

And and and I get so much fulfillment

from that.

My parents have this fundamental belief.

It's so beautiful. They They believe

every child is born with a diamond, with

a gift, with a with something in them.

So, I found one of my diamonds early on.

It was magic. Right? So, I was really

good at magic. They hoped it was

medicine, accounting, you know, the

Asian prophecy. So, when I found that

diamond being magic,

I thought that all I had to do was get

really good technically as a magician.

Cuz that's what I was told at university

being an accountant. Oh, if you become

really technically proficient as an

accountant, you'll become an amazing

accountant. You'll You'll be successful.

You get the BMW. You get everything. Get

partner.

So, I thought, okay, magic, same thing.

Get really good technically. Spent

thousands of hours in my bedroom by

myself, in front of a mirror, practicing

magic. Got nowhere.

Because I was missing an ingredient.

Magicians call it showmanship.

Fancy word for communication skills.

Right? One of We We're both inspired by

the same person, I believe. One

one of the people we're inspired by is

Derren Brown. Impeccable showmanship.

Impeccable technical skills.

So, when you pair technical skills with

great communication skills, that's when

you thrive, I believe.

Because let's say for example, you're

technically brilliant, you're a 10 out

of 10 technically, but you're three out

of 10 with your communication skills. Do

you think people perceive you to be a 10

out of 10 or a three out of 10?

And you know this hearing so many

different pitches.

Some of the greatest ideas have flown

under your radar without you noticing

because the founder didn't do it

justice.

It's an interesting idea to think that

we might rise or fall to the level not

of our technical ability, but our

communication skills as it relates to

how the world perceives us. And it's

both. The importance there is both.

Whereas I feel like we get stuck into

this world where we think, oh, it's one

or the other.

And all my students always ask me this,

which one should I focus on? And I said,

well, the reality is both. Mhm. It's

it's not as simple. It's it's both.

Because if I have great showmanship and

then when it comes to do doing slight of

hand, I suck.

Oh, that's not going to work either.

The people that I've been able to help

the most in my career so far are the

people who are technically

so amazing at what they do.

And they've been hidden away in the back

office as a technician. And then bloody

Brad always gets the promotion. Right?

Brad always gets it. Ah, damn it, Brad

got it again. Brad's not smart as me.

Brad is not as good as me. Right? And

and it's because Brad talks better.

He's more visible in the work

environment. You really think it often

comes down to just how we speak and

communicate? Our value, yes. Because if

you can't communicate your value in a

way that is clear and concise,

people it's it's not their

responsibility to see the brilliance

that exists within you.

It's, I believe, your responsibility to

learn how to shine your light brightly.

It's super sad because I lived a massive

part of my life like that.

English is my third language.

Uh first language I learned as a Chinese

dialect. It's not that impressive. My

wife speaks five, but thank you. The

first language I learned was a Chinese

dialect called Teochew.

All right, so a bit of Teochew for you.

You see Teochew now?

Second language I then had to learn

fluently is Vietnamese.

So I had to learn all these different

languages growing up. These are my first

two core languages that if I wasn't

proficient in it, grammar would be

pissed off. Mom would be pissed off. So

we had to study it.

And then I went to school and had to

learn English.

So I went to school.

I was completely invisible. I couldn't

communicate with any other kid. They

couldn't communicate with me. So what do

kids do? Oh, it's too hard. Oh, we'll

just ignore you then. They bully you.

Oh, yes. I didn't even know it was

bullying because I couldn't understand

them.

Right, I could kind of read what they

they seemed to mean, but I had no idea

what they were saying. So I spent so

much of my childhood, especially in

those single digit years around 5, 6,

and 7, this is super sad, but I I just

spent a lot of time in the toilet.

Cuz I didn't want to deal with the shame

of being seen by myself.

So I just hid. I just found a corner

somewhere no one and then gradually I

started to learn English, but even when

I learned English, I sounded funny.

Because I had an accent.

So then they'll call me fob.

FOB, fresh off the boat.

And they just kept calling me, "Oh,

there's the fob. There's the fob. Oh,

he's so fobbie. He's so And then so then

even though I learned the English

language now, I'm scared to speak it

because I don't want to sound like a

fob.

And there were all these challenges. And

so I know what it's like to feel

invisible. I know what it's like to

be ignored and

That was a long time ago and I guess the

question that leads me to me with this

is how easy is it for someone to learn

like what is the time span that it would

take from the experience you've had with

teaching people to to make a radical

change in your communication skills?

It depends on your level of desire and

motivation. If you really want it,

I'd say it's 3 to 6 months. You think

you can change your communication skills

in a radical way in 3 to 6 months? I've

seen it. I've seen students do it. It's

when instead of just thinking about I'm

trying to learn a new habit. It's what

James Clear says. You you adopt a new

identity. Mhm. Where they adopt that new

identity. Because one of the things I do

is I share that story about my schooling

experience at the beginning of my

in-person classes and I say,

"I want you all to imagine now you're at

a new school.

No one here in this room with us right

now has any pre-conceived idea of who

you are.

Break the mold.

Break it."

And then you see grown adults

do things they wouldn't normally do.

Break out of their play with their

voice. Be a little silly. Reconnect with

their inner child. And then in that

moment they fall so deeply in love with

that version of them because of the

reactions they've been able to get from

all these strangers around them that

they commit to it.

It's when you experience that change in

the moment, it usually leads to a fairly

profound desire after that. Oh, I want

to become this now. But then they make a

big mistake.

And the biggest mistake they make is

they'll go home to their partner

and who has no context of the experience

they've been through

and they've just went, "Oh, I've been

quiet with my my voice my entire life."

And they'll go home to their new me, new

year, new machine. Hey, honey, I'm and

then their their their their partner

goes, "Oh, why are you doing that with

your voice? Oh, you learned that from

Vin. What That's gross. Why are you

doing that? That's so fake. It's so

inauthentic."

And then they revert back to who they

have always been their entire life.

What areas of one's life

have you seen in those examples change

when someone learned communication

skills? Cuz we we have to use the

examples you've given so far are just

like work. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

With their children.

This has been the coolest part cuz I'm a

dad.

I I get

I I I teach a concept called uh vocal

foundations, which we can dive into

later. And there's these beautiful five

core vocal foundations that people can

learn and I love it when parents go

through it cuz I always see these

comments

where they said,

"Oh my goodness, just read to the kids.

They've never reacted to me in that way

before."

The moment the one night I go home and I

read to my kids and I do it in a boring

way, they'll go, "Dad,

don't read it like that. Do it the fun

way."

And and what they're asking for is

they're asking for that vocal variety.

They're asking for that inner child for

that playfulness.

And I think that's one of the greatest

I think that's one of my greatest

superpowers is the ability to be

playful.

And the willingness to be playful. So

you're going to help me in work, you're

going to help me be a more entertaining

engaging parent. Are there any other

areas of one's life that improve when

they crack communication?

Yes, there is an area and the area is

improv.

Learn improvisation. People all want to

get better at communication. Often it's

because they want to get better at

conversations. What is the game of

conversation? What are we doing right

now? What are we doing? This is game of

improv. I don't know what you're going

to say. You don't know what I'm going to

say. And then based on what I say, you

improvise and you say something. So even

though I know you've never done improv

before, you are amazing at improv.

Because that's a skill you had to have

developed to become the incredible

podcaster that you are right now. Right?

So that to me is such a important skill

when you're playing with your kids, too.

It helps you with all areas of life.

It's the tide that lifts all boats.

Because kids love to play. They'll say

something like, "Oh, and then the then

the cow now is an astronaut." And most

parents will be like, "Ah, that's cool,

honey. That's cool." No play. Now it's

also fighting zombies that exist on the

moon and you didn't know about it. And

you play with them. And when you're

playing, what are you using? You're

using your ability to communicate.

And how many people have you taught in

person and or online? Oh, over 70,000

now. Wow.

Yeah. You have millions and millions and

millions of followers online as well

that tune in to learn communication

skills from you from all around the

world.

And if And if I was to zoom in on

the DMs that you get, Mhm. the things

that people are struggling with when

they message you,

the reason why they watch your videos,

what is it? The most common message that

we get when people type a comment and

leave it on our videos is, "Is it

possible for me to change the sound of

my voice?"

Really? Well, because you think about

it, right? Nobody likes the sound of

their own voice.

The first time you heard yourself on a

podcast, were you like, "Oh, no." or did

you say, "I love it. Look how sexy I

sound."

I was younger and I was little cassette

recorders and I heard my voice and I was

like, "Fucking hell, who's that?"

Yeah, me too. Right? So, that is the

biggest inse- one of the biggest

insecurities for most people when they

first become problem aware with their

communication skills is, "Oh, is it

possible for me to change the sound of

my voice?

Is it possible?

Is it possible? And then

And when you reflect upon this, even

when you reflect reflect upon this, most

people in their entire life will never

change the way they sound. They will

never change the way they communicate.

They'll change the way they dress,

they'll change their hair, they'll

change their glasses, they'll change

their They'll change all these things

about themselves.

But the way they communicate, the way

they sound,

stays consistent, generally.

It's because there are a lot of

psychological blocks that keep us

sounding the same.

We keep ourselves sounding the same.

You know, there's I'll share with you a

few of these, okay?

With my vocal teacher, at the beginning

of my journey, when she got me to do

things with my voice where she said,

"All right, let's do a really high

voice. Have a bit of a play, Vin. And

you know, go into falsetto." And she'd

make me do things like this. I'd go red.

Because I'd go, "Oh, that feels so

weird. Oh, now I'm becoming so deep with

my voice. This feels so fake and it

feels phony." I immediately came up with

those objections.

As I'm sure you would feel that too if I

got you to do that, right? And when I

deal with my students, that's the

immediate thing that comes up. They go,

"It's fake. It's phony.

That's not me."

And then now, just like my vocal

teacher, she would always challenge me.

She goes,

"Well, if you could make the sound and

you played the key on your piano, you

describe to me then, how is it fake? How

is it fake? If you were able to make

that sound, that is you. That is your

instrument. That is just you playing

with keys you're unfamiliar with."

That's it.

You've gone through this entire life

being so familiar with this key that

anytime you pressed any other key, you

go, "Oh, it's not me." No, no, no.

You're just familiar with this key and

you're unfamiliar with the others.

That alone helped me understand that, oh

wow.

It's not fake. Because for the longest

time I thought it was fake. And because

I thought it was fake, I never changed

the way I talked. And and why is it that

we don't want to play with those other

keys? Is it because we've got so used to

playing with a a particular set of keys

and You're so familiar with it. Playing

the other keys comes at a cost, a

perceived cost. Well, it goes deeper

than that. It goes even deeper than that

because where did you get your voice

from?

Who did you learn it from?

There's an idea that people have in

their minds about this thing called a

natural voice, okay? This is another

objection my students give me. They go,

oh, that's not my natural voice.

And speech pathologists will tell you

this. The voice you have right now is

not your natural voice. You lost access

to your natural voice when you were two

or three.

Question, if I asked you to scream at

the top of your lungs right now

Yeah. for about 10 minutes Yeah. what

would happen to your voice? I would lose

it. Yeah. My daughter, 12 months old,

can scream for 3 hours, Steven, and she

does not lose her voice.

Because they have this beautiful access

to their instrument. They can naturally

access that instrument. Whereas as we

grow older at the age of three or four,

we start to be inspired by certain

people in our circles. As a result of

being inspired by people, what do kids

do? They emulate, they copy.

So the voice that you've developed,

you've copied that based on the people

you were inspired by when you were

young. It's just a series of habits. The

way you speak, the way you sound is just

a series of behaviors. It's how you

manipulate your vocal chords, how you

move air through your body, how you

shape your lips, where you place your

teeth, how you maneuver your tongue, how

you maneuver your soft palate. Depending

on how you do all of that, you create a

certain sound. But if I change now, as

you said, people are going to think I'm

weird.

Well, that's right. Well, that's what

Well, that's the thing. You have to have

a process to go about that change. Okay.

Cuz if you immediately just talked

tonight with your partner with no

context They'll go freak out. Yeah.

They'll be like, what the hell? Why did

you Why did you talk to Vin?

You've had them on the podcast before.

Yeah, why? Now you're fake, right?

We'll get to that in a moment.

Mhm. What I'm saying is that the reason

why you don't move from that is because

you genuinely feel stuck.

I'll give you the reason behind it. When

you're first imitating dad, I had one of

my students, his name's Tanzir.

Beautiful, beautiful guy.

He had a very soft way of speaking.

Beautiful, soft way of speaking. And

what he didn't realize is that in the

beginning of his life, he saw dad do it,

really inspired by dad. So he copied

dad. So he had to consciously think

about all these little behaviors, all

these nuances to copy dad's sound. And

then after you repeat those behaviors

for 1 year, 2 years, you no longer have

to consciously think about it cuz you've

mastered it. So now those behaviors move

from your conscious mind, it moves into

your subconscious mind. And then when

behaviors move into your subconscious

mind, now it feels automatic.

So now you feel like it's you.

So now you don't doubt it. You go, "No,

no, that's me." He's like, "No, no, it's

still just a series of behaviors." Yeah.

And I often tell my students, I say it

all the time. I say, "Don't be so

attached to who you are in the present.

You don't give the future version of you

a chance."

And the moment these things happen, it's

incredible seeing these changes because

all my students will do is they'll

change three things.

More volume,

more melody, bigger hand gestures,

people completely change the way they

perceive them.

It three simple things that they do

creates a profound change in how others

perceive them.

Volume, melody,

and hand gestures. Yeah, I was thinking

to one example of one of my students who

a female, Rachel, who who felt like she

didn't have great executive presence.

And it was because she became

she she labeled herself as being shy.

And I I like to break these things down

for my students, too. I'm like, the the

reason you're shy and the reason you're

really good at being shy

is because you've been repeating the shy

behaviors for the last 25 years. So

you're really good at it. And that's all

right.

It's because you've been practicing shy

for 25 years.

Being more confident, it's about us just

learning a new series of behaviors.

Let's Let's try a larger gesture. Like

I've seen this on multiple podcasts.

I'll just try a larger gesture.

Try a stronger volume. Try being more

melodic with your voice.

And then she was practicing that and

immediately the feelings of oh, it feels

fake. It feels foreign. But I go, oh no,

it's just unfamiliar.

And the moment she makes that reset, she

goes, oh, I'll continue to explore them.

Whereas if she thinks it's fake, she'll

revert back to being who she was before.

So, how do I speak impromptu? How do I

be in the moment and

come up with a good answer?

Another one is

I'm introverted.

Does that mean that I'm doomed?

Okay. Yeah.

And another really common one is I don't

have much connection in my life.

I wish I felt more connected to the

people that I'm around. Why is it that I

can't get past the

the the good day, mate. How are you?

Yeah, I'm good. How are you? Yeah, I'm

good. All right, cheers, mate. Have a

good one. Oh, the small talk. Yeah.

Yeah, this is a big topic, right? So,

again, it's just how do we how do we get

to these conversations like that you get

to have on so many of these wonderful

podcasts that you do. So, I reckon you

would have insights here, too.

Cuz like I was looking earlier, there's

almost like a billion search results on

Google for people trying to figure out

or trying to provide answers to how to

communicate successfully. So, let's get

into it. So, I you use this term vocal

image. Yeah. What does vocal image mean?

It came about when I realized I spend

and I think most of us spend a lot of

time on our visual image, right? How how

we look, our body language, the way we

dress. Mhm.

But very rarely do people spend time on

their vocal image. Yeah.

I'll make it make sense.

When people see you and you reveal your

visual image, they make assumptions

about you pretty quickly. So, they form

assumptions. Oh, this person seems

friendly. Maybe they're confident

because they've got good posture. Maybe

they're smiling, they're friendly.

And then all of a sudden, when you open

your mouth and you speak, they now turn

these assumptions into beliefs.

As in, what may be assumptions before,

now they go, oh,

you are friendly. You are confident.

Right? Or they might think, "Oh, no.

Bit of a wanker."

Right? And And And you've had these

experiences before. I've had them

before. Where you assume you see

someone, you're like, "Oh, that person's

really Go and meet them." You're like,

"Oh, not really nice. That's weird." So,

it's another layer that we don't think

about though, because we again think

we're stuck with our voice. We think

we're stuck with the way we communicate.

We think there's no way for me to ever

change this.

So, let's let's talk about how one can

improve their vocal image so that

they're effective across context.

Sure. You mentioned melody, volume, hand

gestures. If we start with melody, what

the hell is melody?

The different notes you can hit with

your voice. Okay, so is that variety?

Yeah, variety. Yeah, pitch variety.

Pitch and melody. Okay. Well, because

there's a melody that lives underneath

your voice.

All right, let's do an experiment. I'm

going to play you a a piano song. And I

want you to listen to this and then

you at home right now, I want you to

listen to

to the track and see what words come to

mind. So, we'll just play it. We'll play

this song.

Okay, yeah. Um all right, sadness.

Right. So, so And then if if listeners

at home could could could have a voice

here too, that's maybe say they'll say

somber. Mhm. Nostalgic. Yeah. Right? All

these words would come up. And And

again, if we sat with this for a while,

we'd get plenty of words. Let's try

another one. Let's Let's change the

mood. Let's shift to something like

this.

Um inspirational, motivational. Good.

See, all of a sudden now And And I'm

thinking running towards something.

Yeah. Right? I And And again, there's a

part of me that thinks, "Oh, cheesy

commercial." Right? There's a There's

that part of it too. So, you can hear

all these different things. Let's try

one more. This one We'll shift gears

again.

What about this one?

Uh like a horror movie. Scary. About to

die. Yes.

Something bad's about to happen.

Ominous.

Little little three-year-old stood on

the the landing of the staircase at

night time.

Yes, with long black hair.

Yeah. Yes, correct. So, that that that

again all of a sudden

paints all these different vivid

pictures in your head.

The reason I did that experiment is

there were no words

in any of those tracks.

Yet think about all of the words that

rushed to your mind as you were

experiencing the melody.

The different notes.

What people fail to realize is that you

have a melody in your voice. Yeah. This

is why when some people walk into our

lives

it

it could drain the energy from our

lives.

And when they walk in you feel the

impact of them walking in. Right? In the

negative way or a positive way. Some

walk in and you go, "Oh, I feel good. I

feel great." What is that? It's the

melody in which they come in with. Can

you have a pretty limited range limited

melody but still hit people with scary

and sad and inspiring? I believe you

can. Yeah. Yeah, again because we we

genuinely don't have 88 keys, right? So

again, it's one of the it's a it's a

metaphor, but I believe that we can

create so many different songs with our

voice if we learn to treat it as an

instrument.

And we we can we can play with the

technique to help you increase your

vocal range if you want.

Sure. There's something called a this is

fun. This is a fun one. There's

something called a siren technique.

Okay. Okay, so a siren technique is when

you you read something with a low voice

and then you go towards a high voice and

you go back down to a low voice. So now

I don't want you to do it to start with.

I just want you to read this as you

would and then we'll try the siren

technique. So just read it as you would

naturally first. So just read that as

you would. Okay, so for those that can't

see, Vinnie's passed me a card.

Yeah, cue cards.

On the card it has a bunch of words

which I'm just going to read.

And then and as you're listening at

home, have a guess of what movie this is

from. Want to know how I got these

scars? My father was a drinker and a

fiend. And one night he goes off crazier

than usual. Mommy gets the kitchen knife

to defend herself. He doesn't like that,

not one bit. So me watching, he takes

the knife to her laughing while he does

it.

Turns to me and he says, "Why so

serious, son?" Comes at me with the

knife. "Why so serious? He sticks the

blade in my mouth.

Let's put a smile on that face. And why

so serious? Beautiful. What movie is

that from? No idea. I don't want to Oh,

are you serious? Dark Knight, the Joker.

Okay, well Oh, so Heath Ledger is so

amazing. Okay, cool, great. So again,

you read that in your neutral voice.

Now, what we're going to do is we're

going to play with the instrument. Okay.

So, the siren technique is when you read

with a really low voice and then

gradually go to a high voice and I'm

going to challenge you to not be afraid

to go into the falsetto. Not be afraid

to play. Okay. Just play. And and and

it's not about going low at the start

and then high at the bottom. Within each

sentence, I want you to go up and down,

up and down. I really want you to play

with your voice. Okay.

Otherwise, I'm going to push you. Okay.

Okay. In three, two, go for it. Want to

know how I got these scars?

My father was a drinker. Kind of a

fiend. Good.

And one night he gets all crazier than

usual.

Mommy gets the kitchen knife to defend

herself. Okay. Wow.

It hurts. Now, try to go in a way where

it is a little more even. Just give it a

go. But, normally you won't be able to

because you won't have all of the range

fully expanded. So, try again. Keep

going. He doesn't like that, not one

bit. Good.

So, me watching

he takes the knife to her. Yes.

Laughing while he does it.

Good.

Turns to me

and he says

Why so serious, son?

Fantastic. That's fantastic. You did a

great job, right? Okay. But, you feel

that feeling you feel right now? Yeah,

weird.

It Yes. And it's not so much about

getting you to speak like that on the

podcast, but it's more just helping you

realize

this instrument that you have is capable

of so much more. Yeah. There is so much

more that it can do as opposed to what

we normally do with it.

Right? Because for the longest time in

my life, I didn't have any melody.

Because I did I I just thought this was

how you talk.

And the reason I can switch to this very

quickly, Stephen, is because I practiced

these behaviors for about 25 years.

What's even more interesting is that

they've they've they've done studies

where they had five or six people

talking at the same time

and the person who the person heard was

the person who had more melody in their

voice.

Oh, really? The person who is more

melodic, what they say becomes more

memorable.

Whereas if all of us were speaking like

this, me, yourself, Jack, everyone, all

of a sudden you wouldn't hear

you wouldn't be able to hear the

difference. Mhm. Whereas all of a sudden

if you just start to play with your

voice a little more.

How do you know you've not played with

it too far? Do you know what I'm saying?

By playing with it too far and then

getting feedback. Right.

And people are so afraid of that though.

And they don't realize that they they

don't go too far, they underplay.

The risk is not going too far. The risk

is not going far enough. Again, at this

point when people heard me Of course, of

course, of course. squeaking like Mickey

Mouse, they're going to say, "Fuck me,

like I

you're going to have to remind me again,

Vin, why this is worth it." You'll be

able to make people feel more connected

to you. They'll feel what you're saying,

not just hear what you're saying. I

mean, do you notice this in some people?

Of course. They'll say things, but you

don't feel it. Yeah. It happens in

America's Got Talent, Australia's Got

Talent, where Simon Cowell will say,

"Right, right, very good, but I don't

feel it."

What are they talking about? It's the

emotion in their voice.

There is emotion in your voice, too. Do

you want to go to the next one? Please.

I didn't know there was more. There's

more. Yeah, there's five. Let's go

through all five. No, no, next one. I'm

just going to get you to read this one

as you would and then I'll tell you what

it is. Okay. Just so you don't get ahead

of yourself. Okay. Okay, cool. And and

see, tell me if you please tell me you

know this movie. Fire out, Stephen.

I don't know who you are.

I don't know what you want.

If you are looking for ransom, I can

tell you that I don't have money. But I

I do have but but what I do have are a

very particular set of skills. Skills I

have acquired over a very long career.

Skills that make me a nightmare for

people like you. If you let my daughter

go now, that'll be the end of it. I will

not look for you. I will not pursue you.

But if you don't, I will look for you. I

will find you and I will kill you. Yes,

very dark movies. I love these movies.

What movie is this? That is the movie

called

where he his daughter gets kidnapped.

What's it called?

Yes, Taken. Yes, it's called L his name.

Lion King, I'm joking. No, what is it?

Right, from Taken.

But here's the thing.

So, the next foundation is rate of

speech. Okay. So, if you're reading that

and I was kind of just giving you some

coaching, again, as you're reading that,

think of rate of speech of having a

scale from zero to 10. Yeah. All right,

so one being painfully slow and 10 being

as quick as you possibly can.

So, you were around playing around a

five. Very comfortable, that's your

default rate of speech. Most of us when

we're nervous, we just have a default

rate of speech. We fall victim to a

default rate of speech.

When you think about rate of speech,

there's a way to use it.

And the way you use rate of speech is

if you really want to highlight a point,

creating an auditory highlight, slow

down.

That creates an auditory highlight. It's

like a highlighter with your words. And

if you want to be able to show charisma

and energy, you you speed up. And if

it's not as as important, you can speed

up and that's fine.

This simple rule gives you vocal variety

with your rate of speech.

That simple rule. And what does changing

my rate of speech then do to the message

I'm communicating? It makes it more

memorable.

Clear, okay. There's more clarity in it.

Right, so for example, if I if I was

speaking and I said

right now I'm going to go through the

five core vocal foundations and I'm

going to take you first one through is

the rate of speech then after that I'm

going to talk to you about pitch and

melody and then after that I'll talk to

you about the importance of the other

three. Right now, you have no idea what

is important and what is not important.

Okay, right.

Whereas all of a sudden now, if I said

I'm going to take you through the core

five vocal foundations.

All of a sudden you now have a point of

focus. And the big thing that people

want with their communication is

clarity.

Well, if you are going to be more clear,

the delivery needs to be clear so that

the receiver gets what you intend.

Okay. It's not just about the exchange

of information because how I say

something impacts how you receive it.

So, I want to slow down where I want to

hit emphasis.

Yes. Okay.

And this script has multiple places

where you want to slow down. When people

are nervous Yes. What what happens?

up. They speed up.

They speed up. Considerably.

Considerably.

And have they ever measured that?

Oh.

Does anybody know? If you get above 210

words per minute, you're you'll be a

little bit too fast. And what's the

average person speaking at in terms of

words per minute?

Around 150. You want to get to around

150-180. That's very good. That's a good

kind of rate of speech to be at.

Whereas if you're slower than that, then

again, it just gets a little bit

monotonous at times for people. But

again,

here's what's fascinating.

If I

if all of a sudden now

I stick to a default melody and then

stick to a default rate of speech,

notice what's happening in your brain.

Right? All of a sudden, you start to

Again, you start to switch off, right?

Whereas all of a sudden, if I start to

vary my rate of speech, the transition

from slow to fast is what's hooking

people. So if you were to try to read

that again now,

but I want you to slow And some bits

painfully slow down and play with your

voice. And then some bits go quicker.

And then the last bit, I'm going to kill

you, slow it all the way down. And be

playful. It's not about

Okay, I'm going to start from here.

Sure.

If you're looking for a ransom

I can tell you that I don't have money.

But what I do have

are a particular set of skills.

Skills I have acquired

over a very

long

career.

Let's skip to the end.

If you let my daughter go

that will be the end of it.

I will not look for you. I will not

pursue you. But if you don't

I will look for you.

I will find

you.

And

I

will

kill

you. Yes, give him a big round of

applause. That was amazing, right? But

again, you feel so strange when you do

it.

Yeah, I do.

Yeah. It's so fun to listen to.

And And And again, this is us

practicing. This is a safe environment.

I'm not

Don't do your next podcast like that.

But, again, it just goes to show the

range that we have access to. And how it

changes the message in such a profound

way. It's the same words. Yeah.

It's the same words, but when you read

it the first time, it didn't sound scary

at all. Now, I feel scared. There's

something I I noticed this in like board

meetings and stuff, especially with like

younger team members or people that

would class themselves as being shy,

that they do hurry along. And there is a

certain Someone said to me the other day

that people that have the most

confidence and charisma, they like move

and talk as if a li- if they were a li-

a lion.

Yeah, yeah. You know, they're slow and

they're composed.

Predator versus predator. I remember

listening to the episode. It was

fantastic.

Yeah. There is. It's people who are

confident take their time. What's that

third one? Okay.

I'll just read part of it. Okay. Read

part of it. You're You're You're more

than happy to freestyle. Read part of

it. Now, if you know what you are worth,

then go out and get what you are worth.

But, you have to be willing to take the

hits and not pointing fingers saying you

ain't where you want to be because of

him or her or anybody. Cowards do that.

And that ain't you. You're better than

that. Now, the thing is, this next one

is volume.

Oh, [ __ ] Yeah. Volume so critical.

Okay. For many different reasons. Volume

is the lifeblood of your voice.

Mhm.

Volume carries all the other foundations

you're about to learn. Volume carries

the melody. Volume carries the rate of

speech. It carries everything. Right?

And again, I think of it as having a

scale of 1 to 10.

And a lot of the times, like what you

just did, people are around a three,

a four, Mhm.

and they stay around there.

When you use volume, there's two ways to

auditorily highlight something with

volume. Volume's fascinating cuz with

rate of speech, you slow down.

But, with volume,

to highlight something,

you could go very quiet.

Okay.

So, if all of a sudden I wanted to say

something scary, I could lower my volume

and say it.

But then all of a sudden notice what

happens if I just stay here now.

What started as a great verbal highlight

now just kind of seems

doesn't seem effective anymore. Because

if you make something default,

it becomes non-functional.

And what signals I'm not a confident

person? What side of the scale?

The lower scale. Okay.

On volume. Okay. Because that's one of

the

default shy behaviors that a lot of

people exhibit. And what about leaders?

Where do they land on the scale?

Depends if they're self-aware. Right.

Sometimes if they're not self-aware,

they can be on the higher end. And

that's, you know,

you just have someone come across as a

little arrogant. Sometimes they're just

too much volume. Because too much volume

without the other foundations, now you

come across arrogant. So, again, if I

give this back to you,

and again, just for fun, like I I want

you to go loud. I want people to hear

outside of this studio what we're doing.

Yeah, [ __ ] So, just just have a go. And

just And give me And give me a whisper,

too. At some point you give me a

whisper, too.

Now, if you know what you're worth,

go out and get it.

Go out and get what you're worth.

But you have to be willing

to take the hits.

And not point your finger saying you

ain't where you want to be because of

him or her or anybody.

Cowards do that.

And that ain't you. Yeah.

You're better than that.

Oh.

It's amazing. Yeah. What you just did

made me feel. Why did I feel? Is What is

a voice? A voice is a series of

vibrations.

So, you just sent

vibrations my way that made me feel.

Mhm. That's why we say people have good

vibes.

Right? We kind of we we we understand

it's happening, but we don't understand

at that kind of frequency level, at the

vibration level. But it's happening at a

physical level. Mhm. Where depending on

how you use your voice, you're genuinely

moving people quite physically.

We did rate of speech, we did volume, we

did the metronome, yeah.

And then there's there's two left,

right?

There's two left, yeah. Right. So this

one, read it as you would, parts of it.

And it's not because I'm lonely, and

it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I

came here tonight because when you

realize you want to spend the rest of

your life with somebody, you want the

rest of your life to start as soon as

possible.

What we're moving into now is the

emotion that exists within your voice,

tonality. This is the emotion that

exists, right? So the way to add more

emotion into your voice is to move your

face.

Because as I eloquently put it at times,

your face is the remote control that

allows you to add emotion into your

voice. Yeah. So let's play, right? So

now I'll give you different faces to

make, I'll tell you different faces to

make, and you make those different

faces, and allow those emotions to come

through your voice. Okay. So if it's

happy, then I want you to sound really

happy. If it's sad, I want you to sound

really sad. So what we'll start with and

and try your best to play with this. I

want you to make disgust, like just uh

disgust, and let that come through, and

give me a more volume. Give me disgust

in three, two.

And it's not because you're lonely.

Yeah.

And it's not because it's New Year's

Eve.

Surprised. Really surprised.

I came here tonight because when you

realize you want to spend the rest of

your life

Angry. Give me angry.

You want the rest of your life to start

as soon as possible.

Happy. Best of your life, Stephen. You

want the rest of your life to start as

soon as possible. That's so beautiful.

You know this already. In our brains,

there's mirror neurons, right? And when

I see you go through these different

facial expressions, I feel what you

feel. Even though I know this is a a a

situation we've created here for us to

experiment in, it's a safe environment,

but every time you went through any of

those emotions, I felt it. Mhm.

Because I didn't just see it. Are men

worse at this stuff? Yes, they are. Yes,

because I feel well, for me, I can only

speak personally for me, I was taught to

keep my emotions on the inside. Right. I

was taught that it's a sign of weakness

to show you being sad, you being happy.

You should just be Composed.

Composed at all times.

And then that's what I thought and that

that led me to the behavior of speaking.

Whereas I would just always speak like

this.

Because I'm a man.

And I should always speak like this. And

I still remember going to one of the

concerts and my my my wife turns up and

she goes, "How do you feel?" I'm like,

"This is a really exciting concert."

And and and and she goes, "Well, okay.

You obviously hate it." And I'm like,

"No, no, I I love it. I love it." And I

just I didn't know how to emote.

And again, I thought I was stuck like

that. Because I was stuck like that for

years. And that that damaged a lot of my

relationships.

Because here's a thing that I think

and it might be helpful for you, too.

When you're listening to someone talk,

you don't have to react with sound.

Because otherwise, you'll be seen as

interrupting the other person, right?

You can react with facial expressions.

And that is one of the most powerful

ways to show them you're listening and

that you're following along.

How cool is that? Cuz if someone's

saying something really bad and you're

like,

Yeah. It shows them you're locked in.

Yeah, you learn it as a podcaster.

Yeah, you do. Because the audience

they're looking at you

for most of the conversation. So, 95% of

the conversation's on you. Yes. What

they don't know Yes.

is that throughout that time, I'm

basically talking to you with my face.

You are. And you're really good at it.

So, if I turn my head like this, it

means tell me more. So, I'll be You'll

be talking like that like this. And it

means tell me more. Yes. And then it's

it's interesting.

And you can expand that range.

Yeah. It doesn't just have to be

curious. Yeah. And cuz I see you do it.

Yeah. I see you consistently do the

different faces to give me the cue to

almost go, "Oh, he wants to elaborate.

Oh, he's in. He's locked in." Do you

know you can The thing I've learned from

both speaking on stage and doing this is

you can also [ __ ] it up. You can also

communicate the wrong thing

Yes. accidentally. One of them that

people communicate quite often with that

accidentally is they start talking while

you're speaking. Do you ever know that

like when someone's

um listening to speak,

they start They start going like this,

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."

And it means shut the [ __ ] up. I need to

I have something to say.

I just did it No, like that. But there's

that kind of

NO, BUT IT'S THAT KIND of thing. It's

like, you know, I think who was it I was

talking to? It was Vanessa, she said,

"If you do the fast nod,

it means shut the [ __ ] up. So, if you go

yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But,

if you do the slow nod, it means oh, I

love this." So, if if I go

Oh, I learned something. That's

curiosity. Tell me more. Versus

Yeah.

When do you shut the [ __ ] up?

Yeah, yeah, and wave my hand. Yeah,

yeah, yeah. Yeah. Okay, so tonality, so

emotion. And that was so beautiful to

see you do that.

Because it just again, we just have such

great range.

And then imagine you start to vary your

rate of speech now.

You vary volume. You've got different

melody. You've also got different facial

expressions. This is such a rich

song that you're playing now.

Do you think much about the actual words

you're saying as well?

Of course.

You can see that you think about the

structure of what you're saying. I mean,

the like you're thinking about cuz when

you start speaking, I notice that you

often go into a story straight away.

Something interesting. You'll say, "This

is one of the greatest things I've

learned from my teacher."

Is that intentional? It is, because I

believe stories are more sticky than me

just throwing you a bunch of tips and

hacks and tricks. Do you have a

storytelling formula? I do. What is the

storytelling formula?

I think the way most people tell stories

is they report stories.

So, I'll share a story with you, okay?

And reporting a story is let's say you

ask me the question, "I This is one of

my favorite stories."

It's let's say you ask me how I met my

wife. A reporting a story

is just me saying, "Oh, I met my wife at

a bar." And I did some magic to her, she

didn't like it, and that was cool.

And I gradually was able to woo her in

the end, but I met her at a bar.

That's me That's me reporting the story.

Right? It kind of sounds like a news

reporter. Yeah. Right? So, if you think

about it again, let me just anchor it

with the news reporter. It's like a news

reporter saying,

"Last night at a bar at 9:00 p.m., Vin

Jang went to a bar called Distill and

tried to pick up a girl, did a cheesy

magic trick, it didn't work. Therefore,

he failed. He came back four times

again, and then he saw her, and then he

succeeded, and now they're married. On

to the next news." Right? So, it's it's

kind of very reportory.

Whereas matter-of-fact. Matter-of-fact.

Whereas this is the story of how I met

my wife.

So I still remember this because

this happened in 2009.

I crashed a girl's graduation party

named Vivian. It was at a bar called

Distill, this beautiful bar called

Distill. And there was two levels to

this bar, on the bottom was for

everybody and on top was the high

rollers and you had to buy expensive

drinks to get to the top. And I got to

the top and I saw this beautiful

Malaysian girl sitting by the bar.

So I said to my friends, I said, "Watch

this." And I take a packet of cards out

of my pants cuz I'm a magician. So I

walk up to her, walk up to her and I

say,

"Would you be impressed if I transform

this king of hearts into the queen of

hearts like yourself?"

Mhm.

Disgusted. I know, you're making the

disgusted face. And and that's how she

reacted. She she looked at me as if she

smelled a bloody fart. She looks at me

and she goes,

"I'd be more impressed if you

transformed into a real man and had a

conversation with me."

Boom!

And I've never had that reaction before.

Normally people say, "Wow, you're

amazing." So I said to her, "No,

thanks." And I left, tail between my

legs, the boys all teased me and

everything. But I was so drawn to her

confidence. Just uh there was something

there. I went back to the bar four times

in a row. She wasn't there, she wasn't

there, she wasn't there, then she was

there.

And I walked up to her the second time

and I said, "Hey,

listen,

what if I transform into a real man

tonight and take you out for a coffee?"

And we fell in love.

You know, and that that's that's the

story of how I met my wife.

Whereas the way I would normally tell

that story is just oh I met her at a

bar, did some tricks, she didn't like it

and then that was fine. Yeah. But all of

a sudden there was so much life, so much

zest in that story. I noticed you added

so much almost irrelevant detail.

Uh-huh.

But you talked about the bar having two

floors and stuff.

it visual. Okay, so I could picture it

in my mind. I wanted to make it visual.

Well, it's it's it's well okay, so

here's the thing, when you think of the

storytelling formula,

if you just give the who, what, where,

and when, that's the basics people need.

But what turns it from reporting to

reliving,

because that's what you want to get to.

You want to get to reliving a story, is

the ingredients that you just called

out. So intuitive of you to call them

out.

Vaks, V A K S, which stands for visual,

auditory, kinesthetic, and smell.

So, I'm just describing those few things

for you, right? It doesn't always have

to have all the ingredients, but you

want to add some of those ingredients.

All right, so the visual I described to

you, the visual. The auditory, what I

said. I did my voice. I did her voice. I

gave you dialogue. Right? So, all of a

sudden you bring those the story to

life. Now, it goes from reporting to

reliving.

So, if I if I told that story, and let's

say that now the connection ability is

again, it's to do with improv as well,

is instead of just going out and saying,

"Here's three ways to show up

authentically when you're trying to pick

up someone." Yeah. Instead of doing

that, I share the story first.

I get you engaged. I build rapport. I

build chemistry. Now, you've heard the

story. Now, you have rapport with me.

You feel more relaxed. You feel more

creative, right? Then, I link that story

to

So, the very next time you walk into a

girl, if she does say no, she may not be

saying no to you. She may just be saying

no to your approach.

Here are the three ways you can show up

more authentically as a man.

I believe that is a much more powerful

way

to then go into the three tips.

Whereas, I I feel that because of the

world now with social media, we just we

we we we we've lost the art form of

storytelling. It's just give me the

three tips now. I've heard you talk

about these four elements to a great

story, which is the hook,

the struggle, the break through, and the

application, which is kind of what you

just displayed there. Well, the the

importance of application I think is

something that I really focus on with my

students. The And by application you

mean the lesson or the big takeaway from

the story. Cuz sometimes people tell

stories and they go nowhere. Well, it's

also what you do after. Okay.

Because I can I can share a story, but

if I

One of our videos went viral. And I

don't claim to be an expert on social

media, okay? So, I don't I still don't

understand how some of these things

work. Even though we've been able to

grow all of our social channels quite

quickly. I don't understand how it

works. It to me I'm like, "Oh well, I

can't believe that worked last time. Oh,

it doesn't work anymore. Huh, that's

weird."

So, to me it's

what people love is when you give them a

really simple pragmatic takeaway that

they can go and actually do.

Like, go do it now. Mhm. Where Where is

we we don't apply knowledge.

We just keep

consuming and go through knowledge

acquisition.

There's There's a cycle of doom that we

go through. There's just this cycle of I

mean, this is the cycle my students go

through.

Oh, job promotion.

Oh crap, I need to work on my

communication skills. What's the first

thing they do? They go to Google.

And then they Google, "How do I improve

my interview skills, my communication

skills?" Then they get back 10.6 million

results. They go, "Ah, this is too

crazy. Surely someone's created a

YouTube video." Then they go to YouTube.

They type in, "How to improve

communication skills?" They get 3

million videos. Right, and they go, "Ah,

this is too ChatGPT. I'll go to ChatGPT

now. How to improve communication

skills?" And it gives you these generic

answers from blogs that have no

relevance to you. And then after that

you feel so overwhelmed you do nothing

with it.

But it's just this cycle we all fall

victim to over and over and over again.

We just keep consuming knowledge and

nothing actually changes because we're

not applying it.

So, the the key is to get out there

and start running some of these

techniques in the real world.

And just pick one.

Pick one and just try it. It's like

we're going through all these different

things. Right after this episode, go out

and just try tonality with your kids.

And read them a children's book because

those books are naturally emotive. And

if you don't have kids, borrow a niece

or nephew. And just watch the impact on

the other human being as you play with

your instrument. Watch them smile. Watch

them giggle. Watch them react to the way

you play your instrument.

Because then it wakes you up

to the fact that you've got access to

this.

And that I can change the way someone

feels.

What power?

Yet we don't use it.

I just realized that there's one more

left.

There is one more left, yeah. Okay, I

know what I know what this is.

Yeah, yeah, of course. If you didn't, I

would be quite deeply offended. Yeah.

I'll get you to read this, and we'll

play with the last one. Okay. Yeah.

Okay.

My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius.

Correct. Commander of the armies of the

north, general of the Felix legions,

loyal servant to the true emperor,

Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered

son, husband to a murdered wife.

And I will have my vengeance in this

life or the next. Perfect.

Now, we're going to read it again,

except the final foundation here with

the voice is pause.

Whatever emotion comes before the pause,

once you pause, it intensifies that

emotion.

So, if you've got the feeling of anger

and you pause,

oh, that is a pause of anger. But, if

all of a sudden I'm sad and

and then I pause,

you prolong the sadness.

It's a pause of sadness. And think about

how important the pause is in music, and

I love the world of music. I love

listening to orchestral music. And when

you think about it, what happens right

after a crescendo?

It's a pause, silence. The most

important note that they play during

that piece.

Yet, we barely use it.

And what else does the pause do? When

you pause, you give me time to process

what you're saying. Mhm. Yet, we are so

afraid of the pause.

My name is Maximus

Decimus Meridius.

Commander

of the armies of the north.

General

of the Felix legions.

Loyal servant

to the true

emperor.

Marcus Aurelius.

Father to the murdered son.

Husband to a murdered wife.

And I will have my vengeance

in this life

or the next. Ah.

Beautiful.

When you paused, you gave me time to to

process the weight of what you're

saying.

Mhm. The first time you read it, you

rushed through it. Just like that

nervous employee in front of their

leaders who just rushed through it. You

may have just shared the most brilliant

plan

for a marketing campaign, but because

you rushed through it, I didn't feel the

weight of

how profound the strategy is. It's

something when you pause, you almost

you tell the person, don't you, almost

inexplicably that

they should really give a [ __ ] about the

thing you just said. Like it really

mattered. It's important. Yeah, cuz

you're like giving it space to breathe.

And you see what all of these

foundations do. What do they give you

ultimately? Like what does it ultimately

lead to? Clarity.

Do you think there's a certain

set of those tools that when applied or

a certain sort of

style of speaking that makes people

dislike you? Is there a sound one that

just doesn't make them warm to you? Is

it the low pitches? Is it the fast

speaking?

The

the sounds that people don't like.

For example, have you ever called I

don't mean to pick on real estate

agents, but it happens a lot to me in

Australia. When you call a real estate

agent, it's

Hello, this is James from XY real

estate.

And when you hear that sequence of

melody,

no worries, I'll put you on to the next

person. And you hit you switch off. You

just go, ah, this person just I'm just

I'm not really connected to that person.

And all you have to do is you just tell

them to switch the melody and just

don't use that sing-song voice. And they

call that a sing-song voice in the world

of vocal training, right? You've got a

sing-song voice. And if you keep

following the same rhythm, you have a

sing-song voice.

So instead of doing that, just go, hey,

it's James. How can I help, mate?

You said the same thing. You just

switched up the melody. That sounds a

little more sincere. Cuz it was a bit

more varied. Exactly, right. And it's

not what everybody uses.

Because once everybody uses the same

thing, all of a sudden it now sounds

like a script. That's why people are so

afraid when they create the content

online, they go,

I don't want to sound scripted.

There's a sound to it. And it generally

follows up That's why newscasters, they

there's a sound to it.

Yeah. Last night at 9:00 p.m.

There's that there's a rhythm and then

they keep using the same rhythm over and

over and over and over again. The same

melody sequence over over and over and

over again. And am I right in thinking

if I wanted to be really boring, I

should just kill all variety?

Kill all the foundations. Nothing. Give

me nothing.

And And it's what happens when people,

again, the people that I serve, it's

what happens is because they go

I'll let my work speak for itself.

And And I say that's great. That means

you do great work, but why not speak for

your work, too?

Why can't we do both? Mhm. Why does it

have to be one or the other?

Yeah. It's a shame not to do your work

justice.

You know, cuz you can do it a disservice

just by delivering it without the

foundations as you've said. Yeah. And

And then other people, as you said, they

could have a half the idea, but double

the

double the showmanship.

Yeah. And that happens, too.

That happens, too, right? So, to me,

it's about helping those who

they've they've got something amazing.

You've got a story you need to share.

You've got an idea you need to pitch.

You've got incredible technical skills

that you've worked on for the last 15

years.

And you're thinking, why am I still

stuck in this position?

It's well, hey, let's let's do great

work and let's

let's allow ourselves to

build the ability and grow the ability

to shine. How does one increase their

self-awareness as it relates to their

communication skills? Is there a Is

there a practice I can do to understand

if I'm good, bad, or ugly at this?

If you're a problem unaware of

communication, and right now you just

go, "Ooh, this is something I need to

work on." Then this is the three-step

process you have to commit to. And just

by doing this,

it's going to dramatically change the

way you talk. It's going to dramatically

change the way you show up.

I call it record and review.

I learned this as a magician.

And it's so practical when it comes to

magic and communication skills.

First step.

Record a video of yourself speaking for

5 minutes.

A full 5 minutes. And then people always

immediately say, "Oh, what do I say,

though?"

Google or ChatGPT, great conversational

starters. And then use those for

yourself and just talk, but it has to be

impromptu.

Because I'm trying to tease out core

behaviors. I don't want you to give me a

pitch that you've delivered 20 times

already. I want you to just in the

moment speak. I'm trying to tease out

some non-functional behaviors. So, once

you've recorded that video of yourself

for 5 minutes,

leave it for a day. Video or just audio?

Video. You want video, you want to be

standing while you're doing this. Okay?

Once you've got that video recorded,

leave it for a day. Because when you

watch it straight away,

I'm fat. I'm ugly. I don't like myself.

I hate the way I sound. You leave it for

a day, you're thinner, you're better

looking, you love yourself more.

Time and space, it's amazing. So, leave

it for a day.

Then when you watch it back, you review

it in three different ways.

The first time,

so you record on your phone, you turn

the sound all the way up, press play,

turn your phone over, just listen.

Here you're doing an auditory review.

And just listen to your voice. And now,

because you've listened to this podcast,

you also have five vocal foundations you

can think about. So, now auditorily,

think about how's my rate of speech?

How's my volume? Oh, my default rate is

around a three. Oh, I speak really slow

and I stick to that. Oh, my default

volume is Oh my goodness, it's one.

Oh, wow, there's no tonality. There's no

emotion in my voice. There's no pitch

for right Oh, I am not pausing. You'll

be able to take so many notes and you'll

be able to hear things you've never been

able to hear before because most people

avoid filming themselves.

Because I hate the way I look and I hate

the way I sound.

Right? Mhm. So, to me, once you do that,

you'll have you'll have a page of notes

and a whole new level of awareness on

your auditory communication skills.

So, the next step is now you turn your

phone back around, you turn the sound

and put it on mute, you press play and

you just look at yourself.

And then as you're watching yourself,

because most people don't do this unless

they're creators, you don't do this.

That's why creators are such great

communicators is because they do this.

That's why you're a a great listener in

a podcast is because you watch yourself

back. So, now as you just watch yourself

back without the auditory feedback, all

of a sudden now you'll see things you

don't normally see.

Oh, wow, I'm swiveling a lot on my

chair.

Oh, wow, I don't use my hands just Oh, I

I put my hands behind my back. Oh, this

is my big tick.

I keep touching my glass I can't help

it.

I need to work on that. But you keep

touching your glasses, right? I keep

touching my face. I keep touching my

mouth. I keep fiddling with things.

You'll see a whole bunch of

non-functional behaviors that you've

never seen before because you've avoided

it.

And also because you have this idea in

your head that you're stuck. Mhm. You're

not. It's just a series of behaviors.

Right? And then afterwards

the final form of review

don't listen to it and don't watch it.

Get it transcribed.

Because now you'll see the way you

communicate from a different

perspective. And you go, "Oh my

goodness, I ramble."

I talk I talked about the same thing

over you because you see it from a

different perspective. Sometimes you

don't hear that. It's easier to see it.

And then you see it and I can see you

reacting, right? But that's that's what

people do is they they go, "Oh, not only

do I ramble

because when you get it transcribed,

leave in all of the non-words and the

filler words. Non-words being the sounds

we make to fill the silence. Filler

words being the words we use to fill the

silence. And so like, do you know what I

mean?

This transcription is immediately going

to reveal to you

all of your auditory clutter.

The things that you say, again,

non-words and filler words, auditory

clutter. That's the again, the and so

like, do you know what I mean? Um uh

Highlight it with a red highlighter.

Because it might not just be those.

One of my big ones was okay.

I taught online

during COVID. As a result of that