"The hidden rules of society" - Steven Pinker Part 2
464 segments
[Music]
Yeah. So I mean this is an important
idea in the book that you've got this
potentially infinite regress of people
thinking well Steven knows that I know
that Steven knows that I know that
Steven knows that I know forever and
that's it seems implausible that that
that is how people are actually thinking
even though that's the effect. Um but
you you suggest that there are certain
acts for example speech acts that just
you know it's it the bomb has been
detonated everybody can see it. So so so
tell us a bit about how different ways
in which you suggest that common
knowledge can be generated that don't
require
the departmental head tapping glasses
and almost reasoning. Well, yes, because
the the idea that the idea is that
common knowledge consists of an infinite
uh set of embedded propositions about
mental states, that coordination
requires common knowledge, and that
social relationships are coordination
games. At first, that might sound
completely implausible because common
knowledge, according to the definition,
would seem to be require superhuman
mental stamina. Your head starts to spin
after two layers of I knows that she
knows, let alone an infinite number
which couldn't even fit into a finite
head anyway. But common knowledge can be
granted at a stroke by a an an event
that is public that's conspicuous that's
that's out there that's self-evident
that you witness at the same time that
you witness other people witnessing it.
that can uh then the common knowledge is
implicit in that situation and we often
refer to it. It seems like a recendite
concept. I suggest that we we're all
aware of it. We just don't use the
language of common knowledge. We use the
metaphor of a conspicuous sound or
object. And you use the you just use the
metaphor of a bomb going off. Um that's
a great example of something that you
can't help but notice when it happens.
Therefore, if a bomb goes off and there
are several people witnessing it, it's
not just that people know the bomb went
off. They know that everyone else knows
that the bomb go went off. And to site
another Seinfeld episode just to show
how we are creative in coming up with
metaphors for the concept of common
knowledge, uh even if we don't reel it
out with all the embedded thoughts is a
case where again George Castanza is the
butt of the humor. He's been dating a
woman for a while and he's uh musing
with Jerry and Elaine whether it's time
to uh go to the next level and uh say to
her I love you. And Jerry says, "Oh,
that's a a big move, Georgie boy. Uh how
confident are you that you'll get the I
love you return?" Says, "50."
Jerry says, "Because if you say I love
you and you don't get the I love you
return, that's a big matzah ball hanging
out there." Uh, a big matabal hanging
out there is another metaphor for a
conspicuous object that can't help but
generate common knowledge. In this case,
a romantic relationship
uh like a friendship, like a sexual
relationship exists as common knowledge.
You're uh if two people are in love,
each one knows that the first one knows
that the other one knows. uh ratified by
in in most cases by the declaration I
love you followed by the refrain I love
you.
>> Yeah. Um you've done excuse me you've
done and you also describe other people
doing uh experiments performing
experiments
on
how common knowledge is generated.
Uh there's the the the burger bun and
the hot dog the hot dog bun and the hot
dog experiment. Um you also to describe
other researchers
these various um scenarios in which
there's an ice cream truck and the ice
cream truck starts moving around and I I
found it fascinating the different ages
at which people are able to think about
what other people know or what other
people don't know. So talk about talk
about that. Yes, there's a famous body
of research probably known to every
psychology student uh on u mentalizing
or theory of mind where in this case the
theory is not the scientist's theory,
it's the intuitive theory that we all
have of what's going on in other
people's heads. Um and to be a competent
social being, you have to
try to guess what someone else is
thinking or feeling. We don't treat each
other like like robots. um but we get
inside their others others heads. So
that's sometimes called mentalizing. And
in the book I talk about recursive
mentalizing which is getting inside the
head of someone getting inside your head
or getting inside a third party's uh
head uh reading the mind of a mind
readader. The famous experiment done by
uh um Joseph Perner and Hans Vimmer uh
involves false belief that being the
ultimate test of the ability to
differentiate what you know and what
someone else's know someone else knows.
Um the you act out with a three-year-old
child. You put a marble in a box and
then the uh Sally uh sorry, Sally puts
the marble in the box. Um leaves the
room. Then the experimentter puts it in
a basket. Uh Sally comes back. Where
does Sally think the the uh the marble
is? A three-year-old will say in the
box. Sorry. A three-year-old will say in
the basket. The incorrect answer because
Sally, not having witnessed the
transfer, has no way of knowing it. The
child knows it. uh and spreads his
knowledge on everyone else. Doesn't have
a separate record for what she knows and
what I know. Then later they did a um
kind of a second order version of that
experiment.
>> I'm sorry. And at what age do
>> Oh, I'm sorry. At four years old, they
get it right. I I forgot to mention
that.
>> They have a theory of someone else's
thoughts.
>> That's the That's the simplest
explanation. Okay.
>> Yeah. Um, and you can do it to the next
level where um Sally um wants to get uh
ice cream. The is told the ice cream
truck is at the church. The um however,
when she goes home to get the money, the
ice cream truck drives away. Where will
Sally go to buy ice cream? And just like
the the marble in the box, then you take
it to the next level. Um, while she went
home, while the ice cream truck went
away, someone told her the ice cream
truck went away.
Um, but uh, her friend John just saw her
leave. Um, where does John think that
Sally will go buy ice cream? If they
can't figure out that John J John's
knowledge of Sally's knowledge is
incomplete, they'll guess that he that
she will go to the church mistakenly
whereas in sorry that she will fail to
go to the church. sorry, she'll go to
the church mistakenly. Um, if the child
projects the knowledge that we attribute
to Sally to John, they'll think that
John um correctly knows that she will go
to the say to the park wherever the ice
cream truck went. So, it's a thought
experiment about um false uh belief
about someone else's false belief taking
it to the second order. Kids don't get
that until they're seven or eight. Um,
>> so, so at three they they don't they
don't get it at all.
>> They don't have a theory of of what
someone else might be thinking. At four
>> they do start to form thoughts about
what someone else might be thinking,
>> but they it starts to break down when
they have to think about what someone
else is thinking about what that person
is thinking. Yeah.
>> So they think
what do they know about what Johnny
knows about what Sally knows. So, it's
not just what they think about what
Sally knows, but you insert yet another
mind in in that um representation. And
that flumxes the four-year-olds who are
okay at figuring out what Sally knows
that they don't know, but what Johnny
knows that Johnny doesn't know that
Sally knows that they know. There it
starts to break down.
>> Yeah.
>> And but eight-year-olds can do can do
that.
>> Eight-year-olds can do it. Now all of
course um I had to struggle to
reconstruct it and I suspect some of you
are are
>> struggling. Everyone's following it
fine. Don't worry. Everyone's we've all
got it.
>> But this is it is mental work and
sometimes as with any kind of uh effort
it can be pleasurable. That's when we
have um murder mysteries, sometimes
comedies of manners, mistaken identity
plots where an author will kind of
stretch our ability to keep track of who
knows what about who knows what.
>> Yes. I ju I I just saw a uh play uh the
comedy about spies. And one of the one
of the setups is they're in a hotel and
there are various different spies
bugging other spies. Well, at least they
think they're bugging other spies. using
a radio to bug the other spies, but
somebody has his radio doesn't work. So,
he's gone to another room and taken
their radio and their radio is now in
his room. So, they're all listening to
and he's also he's an actor and he's
he's um auditioning for the part of
James Bond. So, so he so the comedy is
is trying to track all of these people
formulating all of these false beliefs
about all of these other people. And as
a member of the audience, you know more
than than the protagonists do, but you
you still don't know everything because
there are there are various twists, but
there's a lot of as you say, there's a
lot of pleasure to be derived from from
sort of tracking these mental states. So
So we we were talking about at what age
children form a theory of mind and then
a meta theory of mind. You've got two
levels or three levels. So what can
adults do? How many levels can adults
>> I don't know about comfortably. How many
adults can how many levels can adults
cope with?
>> Generally three or four. But it much
depends on how familiar they are with
the situation. Because uh another common
place of cog cognitive psychology is
that when we encounter a combination of
ideas repeatedly, we can uh put it into
a mental assembly. The technical term is
a chunk. Um I think there are various
equivalents in computer science like sub
routines, memoization, caching uh where
a complex data structure can be referred
to by a sing single symbol. Um so there
can be human scenarios like a scandal or
an affair where they're actually it's
defined by multiple levels of knowledge
about knowledge but they're familiar
enough that they become a cognitive
chunk and we can handle uh multiple
levels and there there even words like
say to humor someone to humor someone
means to you want them to think that you
are taking their thoughts seriously. ly
even though you know you aren't aren't
believing them. And so you can stretch
that limit um that ordinarily seems
comically difficult. If you're throwing
new actors and new relationships at
someone all at once, it seems
impossible. But if they're familiar
combinations, that's often how we deal
with them. Still, there are comedies
that poke fun at our inability or at
least our difficulty at keeping track at
multiple levels.
>> I I have the New Yorker cartoon here. Of
course, I care about how you imagined. I
thought you perceived I wanted you to
feel.
>> Yeah, that's that's funny if it's only
three, right? Because if it's only
three, you can you can follow it.
>> That Well, that exceed Yes, that's
right. If it's only three, then then
then generally you can follow it.
There's also the the scene that I I wish
I had included in the book I was
familiar with, but it did I didn't make
the connection. In the Princess Bride,
there's the battle of wits scene where
Wesley has uh poisoned one of two uh
goblets and Vitini has to figure out
which one he can drink from. And the way
he figures it out is because he fancies
himself as a genius. He said, "Well, you
want me to think that I'm putting it in
the far goblet, but I know since I know
that, I'm going to pick the near
goblet." But you know that I know that
you want me to think it's in the far
goblet. So, you're going to put it in
the far goblet after all. This goes on
for several iterations.
>> Yeah. And and and part of the joke is
that both of them are planning a double
cross that is makes the whole kind of
reasoning about other people's mental
states completely irrelevant. Fini
basically goes, "Oh, look over there."
Then swaps the goblets. And and
actually, yes, I won't spoil it. For
those of you who haven't seen Princess
Bride, you have to see it. Um,
so I wanted to just um can can I can I
get a volunteer from the front row, not
to come up, but just to to answer a
question. Would you would you mind
answering a question for me?
Thank
Okay, you could answer a question for
me. So here is here is your assignment.
Stephen, this is an assignment for you
also. Will don't say anything yet. So um
it becomes apparent that you need to
meet Steven Pinker in London tomorrow.
However, he doesn't have your phone
number. You don't have his phone number.
There's there is no way of of of
coordinating. So where do you go to meet
him? And when
>> um to the tower of the big Ben the
>> whatever is most conspicuous.
>> Yeah. Big Ben. When?
>> Uh midday. I don't know.
>> Steven.
>> Yes. I think I'd probably I'd return
here at the starting time of this event.
Uh
>> there you go. It's tricky because I
would have gone for that. But that also
makes perfect sense. Part of the problem
with these this is called a Thank you
very much by the way. Um this is a
shelling Thomas Shelling the economist
Thomas Shelling um first kind of started
talking about these games. It's called a
coordination game and uh part of the
problem is you're trying to think about
what is most salient and what context
matters. So you were thinking Big Ben is
the most famous landmark in London. It
has a clock and the most obvious time to
meet anybody is midday. It's not crazy.
You were thinking we were both at this
meeting. This is the only place that you
know we have met and the focal time
would be 7:30 the starting time of the
meeting. Also not crazy. Um it's turns
out to be quite a difficult game right
because there's more than one focal
point. But but what do we learn by by
reasoning about this sort of thing?
>> So this is a case where in the absence
of common knowledge we have to use this
next best thing which is common
salience. that is something that uh it
doesn't just pop out but that you can
guess would pop out to other people the
person you're trying to coordinate with.
In Shelling's example, it was the clock
in Grand Central Station at noon in in
New York um at at a time when a lot of
people use Grand Central Station. So a
common salience focal point sometimes
called a shelling point in his honor is
a solution to a coordination game. Now
the thing about a coordination game is
that it has two equilibria. That is
there are two situations such that if
you're in it, if the other if you make a
choice, the other person makes a choice,
there's no reason that either of you
should change your mind. But there's
another option. And if you made that
choice and the other person made uh that
choice, neither of you would change your
mind either. Should you drive on the
right? Should you drive on the left?
Either one is good. It's very important
not to avoid the cell where you drive on
the right, he drives on the left or vice
versa. And um so there's nothing in game
theory and mathematics in rational actor
theory that determines which of those
two cells you should try to get yourself
into. Instead, what shelling consist
says is this is where game theory leaves
off and psychology begins. that is your
theory of mind that is your guess about
what's going on in the other person's
head and vice versa can commend a
solution uh to you um there's no rhyme
or reason to it other than the fact that
it commends itself as a solution there
are many examples in in everyday life
and in actually in highly consequential
circumstances in which people are in a
coordination game and seeking a focal
point so they can get in a one of them
mutually beneficial equilibria. He gives
the example of um negotiation
bargaining. So let's say there is a car
salesman. Let's say there is a buyer.
Let's say there's a range of prices
where they can come to an agreement.
Namely the car salesman makes a profit.
The uh buyer is willing to pay that
amount of money for the enjoyment of
having the car. The question is where in
the range should they settle? any point
within the range is a an equilibrium but
nothing in the statement of the problem
can dictates where they should end up.
It is important that they end up
somewhere because if they walk away it's
uh both of them are worse off. So
shelling suggests that's why often in
negotiations people will um offer to say
split the difference uh when they when
they get near the end. Now splitting the
difference isn't inherently fair. Maybe
one of them started off with a a high
ball offer. Um maybe even anticipating
that they would split the difference and
gets and pulls it in his favor or vice
versa. Or he said they might settle on a
round number. He said the salesman who
announces that his rock bottom price for
the car is £30,0756
is fairly pleading to be relieved of
£7.56.
Namely, obviously the customer say, "Oh,
come on. Let's call it 30,000 even. Now
30,000 is not the fair price, the
logical price, the only price for the
car, but simply as a round number, it
pops up and so it's a possible focal
point for them to uh settle on
Ask follow-up questions or revisit key timestamps.
The discussion explores how common knowledge is generated, moving beyond the theoretical infinite regress to focus on publicly observable "speech acts" or events. It introduces the concept of common knowledge being granted "at a stroke" by conspicuous events, like a bomb detonating or an "I love you" declaration. The conversation then delves into recursive mentalizing or "theory of mind," explaining how children develop the ability to understand others' thoughts at different ages—first-order false belief at four years old and second-order at seven or eight. Adults typically handle three to four levels of recursive mentalizing, though familiarity with "chunks" of ideas can extend this. Finally, the discussion covers coordination games and "Shelling points," where individuals in the absence of common knowledge rely on mutually salient options to coordinate, like meeting at a famous landmark or splitting the difference in negotiations, illustrating how psychology plays a role where game theory alone falls short.
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