Joe Rogan podcast. Check it out.

>> The Joe Rogan Experience.

>> TRAIN BY DAY. JOE ROGAN PODCAST BY

NIGHT. All day.

>> Hey, do [music] Hey, does a red light

therapy really help your [ __ ] eyes?

>> 100%.

>> I'm doing it.

>> Are we rolling?

>> Yeah.

>> My eyes are so [ __ ]

>> Yeah.

>> I can't see. Joe,

>> get one of them Gary Brea beds for your

house. Well, there's a bunch of

companies that sell them, but you want

like a really powerful red light bed. I

did it this morning. Dude, it changed my

vision.

>> I can't When I'm in the shower, I can't

read shampoo, bath gel.

>> Whoa.

>> Like, I'm like, dude, why do they need

to be small? Can't you just make it big

as [ __ ] so everyone can see it?

>> They're not that small.

>> I Well, they're I can't see them. And

then I'm getting out naked putting on

readers to see what I'm [ __ ]

[laughter]

I've washed my hair with conditioner so

many times.

>> Yeah, mine was getting bad. Mine was

getting where I needed these [ __ ]

things, which I haven't picked up in

months. I heard you say that and I was

like, dude, changed my life. I did uh

went to Ways Dwell the other day and I

did the red light bed every day. Every

day until I Googled how much it cost.

That thing's [ __ ] expensive.

>> It's expensive. The real one. But

Whitney got one that's not that

expensive and it's fixed her eyes.

>> She got one that she sits in front of

every day for like 20 minutes or

something like that.

>> I love that.

>> Oh, dude. It's amazing. But the big

ones, the beds, they help your your

whole body recover. They're like, we

could let's let's put it put that into

perplexity and say what is the benefits

of powerful red light therapy?

I [ __ ] I use AI so much now. I was in

the beginning I was resisting it so

much. Then Perplexity came on as a

sponsor and now instead of searching

things online, I just ask the phone. I

just pull up the the app and ask it a

question. I don't have to type anything

and then it gives me an answer and then

I could say well what's the benefits of

it and then it'll list out the benefits

and then I'll say what are the cons and

it'll list out the cons like is there

you know there there any people that

disagree with complexity.

>> Yeah.

>> So I got I got one my questions are

always like they're always more like

about me. So I [laughter] look

>> they're they're very

>> Why do you look yourself up?

>> No, no, not about No, I don't look

myself up. It's about like No, my my

health or my experience in life. So like

So like I was like I was the other day I

was in bed. I was like, "All right,

>> I think my generation

had the greatest run."

>> Like out of out of all the generations

around, my generation Gen X had the

greatest run. We got great childhoods,

right?

>> Right.

>> We got to experience cell phones. We got

to be impressed by the cell phone,

>> right?

>> We uh we had 9/11, which wasn't great,

but was a time of the country healed,

right? Everyone wants a big tragedy like

the JFK shooting. You want that moment

where you walk by a bar and they're

like, "What what are you doing?" Like,

"You haven't heard." We got one of

those.

>> We had the pandemic, which is insane,

right?

>> We had our music probably better. We had

rock. We had I mean, just the all the

internet took off. So, we got to

experience that. I think my generation

Gen X has yours too, right?

>> Right. Yeah, I'm

>> so I asked that to chat GBT and it and I

was wrong.

>> What do you mean?

>> The greatest generation is actually

labeled the greatest generation. It's my

grandmother, your grandmother. They

experienced horse and buggy.

They then went they saw cars. They saw

television. All within the time they had

horse and buggy, they saw people land on

the moon.

>> I mean, all that [ __ ] Telephones.

[laughter]

who got [ __ ] with the baby boomers.

They were just old enough to not

understand cell phones. Like they got

[ __ ] Millennials got [ __ ]

Millennials got real [ __ ]

>> Yeah. I don't know about the greatest

generation. I think I think you're

correct. I think the passage of the

internet, like the internet going

through our lives and and cell phones,

like I experienced VHS tapes first.

Yeah.

>> Then I exper answering machines, that

was a big one. Caller ID, you know who's

calling you. You could just duck people.

That was crazy.

>> I remember when caller ID showed up.

Then I remember Star 69 showed up where

you could block your caller ID.

>> Star 69 was good because you could call

people back that were pranking you.

>> Yeah.

>> Like, "Hey, motherfucker." They're like,

"What? What's going on,

>> dude?" We got prank calls. My kid my my

kids didn't never got prank calls. Like,

they never understood what a prank call

was.

>> The Jerky Boys.

>> Jerky Boys were [ __ ] amazing,

>> dude.

>> Those guys were so funny. So, those

recordings were so funny. You know who

did a great [ __ ] prank call vid uh

recording? Greg Fitz Simmons.

>> Really?

>> Oh my god, it's hilarious. He did this

one where he called a rental car place

and he said that it's the car was on

fire because they they went to the gas

station and they filled up pots and pans

with gas and they put it in the back

seat and [ __ ] Bobby smoking and now

the car's on fire. Like you got to hear

this guy freaking out. What do you mean

the car's on fire? It's you can't do

that anymore,

>> dude. Greg, you know when people go

like, "Uh, what kind of music you listen

to?" And you talk to a real musician

like you talk to the Black Keys, right?

And then you go like, "What do you guys

listen to?" And they're like, "Have you

heard of the Velvet Thud or something?"

>> Right. Right. They got some obscure and

they're like, "That's what you need to

listen to." When people say, "I listen

to Sunday Papers. That's Fitz Simmons

and Gibbons podcast." I go, "You're real

comedy fans. Those are the two funniest

human beings alive ever." Greg Fitz

Simmons. When I got ready for Lucky, I

brought him on the road with me. I was

like, "Dude, I trust you. Just tell me

where I'm sloppy. Tell me where I'm

lazy. Tell me where I'm leaving jokes."

And that first night he was like, "You

got a minute." And he went through my

whole hour. He's like, "I think you're

leaving this on the table." Dude, those

[ __ ] are the funniest dudes

alive.

>> Yeah. Greg's awesome. We started out

together. We We started like one week

apart from each other

>> for real.

>> Yeah. Literally, we went on the road.

God, in the early days, Greg and I

traveled everywhere. We We did open mic.

We would drive to Rhode Island, do open

mics together.

He was a great example of the first dude

I ever saw talking about his family on

stage and it wasn't nerdy.

>> Right. Right. Right.

>> Him and his son ran a train on his wife.

>> What?

>> It was a great joke. He was like, "I had

my first threesome." Uh, it was with my

son, so it's a little awkward. I'm

[ __ ] Greg's joke up. He goes, "My son

was breastfeeding. I was getting her

from behind. [laughter]

We had to high five in the middle." But

I remember hearing that as a can

remember when remember being a dad as a

comic was like off limits.

>> Right. Right. And I saw that and I just

had Georgia. The second person I saw,

the first person is Greg. The second

person I saw and I I mean I'm talking

just had Georgia was Louis [ __ ] CK. I

went and worked the road with him and he

was doing all the material for that

first special that popped for him and he

was talking about his kids and he was

just like, "My daughter's a cunt."

[laughter]

And he goes, "I know you're not supposed

to say that, but what else do you say to

someone who won't put their shoes on?

They're a [ __ ] [laughter] We're trying

to leave the house and they won't put

their shoes. Imagine if you wouldn't

leave." And it was just like and it was

like I'm sitting there, you know, lost

in like what I thought was standup was

like some imitation of Dne, you know,

and I'm watching Louis going like this

is something totally different.

>> Yeah, those guys. Best prank call I've

ever heard. Sidebar, Brendan Walsh.

>> Brennan Walsh is a funny [ __ ]

>> Brendon Wall,

>> what's he up to?

>> I don't know. I think he does like like

a like he's always been like more more

art comedy, you know, like more like

performance. He does these podcasts

where he puts a neck brace on and a wig

and giant glasses and he plays a

character. He's a funny dude, man.

>> Do you remember?

>> He's an Austin guy.

>> He was an Austin guy. He was He was

>> I remember he Do you remember he was on

your podcast? He I remember him telling

the story and I I think about this all

the time. A circus city had closed by

his house and so and he lives in Silver

Lake. Do you remember?

>> That's right. He made a prank we told

everybody was turning into a Whole Foods

[laughter]

and he got everybody so excited. Oh,

Whole Foods is going to be a Silver

Lake.

>> He just did it for himself [laughter] so

that he could be in the coffee shop and

hear people talking about Whole Foods.

>> He did a prank call. I think Stan Hope

sent it to me. He was like, "This is the

best prank call ever." And it's Brendan

calling a sec, like a a phone sex. And

you know, they always try to keep you on

the line, right?

>> So he's like, "Hey, what are you

wearing?" She was like, "Nothing. What

are you wearing?" He's like, "Nothing."

And then you hear like a a dog barking

in the back. And she goes, "Is that is

that your dog?" He's like, "Yeah, yeah.

Ignore him. Ignore him." And then the

dog barks a little longer. And he's

like, "Tell me what what are you

touching yourself?" And then you hear a

baby crying in the back. And he's like,

she's like, "Is that your baby?" And

he's like, "No, it's fine. It's fine.

It's a different room. It's I'm totally

fine." And then you hear a woman come in

and go, "Are you on the [ __ ] phone

sex again?" And he's like, "Hey, leave

me alone." And she's like, "Is there do

you need one to do this later?" He's

like, "Don't worry about it." And then

you hear a marching band come in playing

alua.

[laughter] And he's just trying to hold

her on the line. Dude, I was cry. That

is like like you know, not to like get

too meta about it, but comedy has become

so and I'm a part of this of so

self-promotional and put it on. I got I

got to think it's a new show. When you

see someone like Brendan or like or like

Greg and Mike who ju who just do it for

the pure just to make themselves giggle.

>> Yeah.

>> It's so beautiful. Gillis is like that.

>> Yeah. Gillis is Gillis. I always think

he's just a like a like a my my favorite

Shane Gillis story to that I will for

the until I die. We're doing uh we're

doing Fully Loaded the first year and

it's Shane's on everyone. Mark's on

everyone. Nikki's on everyone. It's like

it's stop. It's the best year we

probably did it. No offense. And Shane

go sees my daughter George who's being a

PA with her friend Daisy. And it's the

very last night and Shane walks up and

he's like, "You guys sneaking beers?"

And they're like, "No." He goes, "Oh,

come on. I'm not gonna rat you out." And

they're like, "No, we're not." He's

like, "Come on. You're 18 years old.

You're on tour. It's our last night. You

guys are sneaking beers." And they're

like, "We're not sneaking beers." He

goes, "I can smell the beer on you." And

they're like, "We we've been sneak

sneaking beers." And he goes, "Okay."

And he just sits down right next to me.

He goes, "George is sneaking beers."

[laughter]

>> Did you know she was sneaking beers?

>> No. I had no idea. Shane just [ __ ]

ratted her out. She's your daughter.

>> Yeah.

>> You're getting hammered every night.

You're not going to notice. Like dad's

drunk. [laughter]

>> He won't even know if we're drunk.

>> Oh, she would. Yeah. She It's funny

because I go to like her college and

other dads, you know, party and then and

like she's like she doesn't She's always

like

kind of low-key about it. Like the dads

will like bite beer cans and kill them

and shotgun beers.

>> What?

>> I know. That's what dads do.

>> Really?

>> Yeah.

>> Which dads? I don't mean any of these

dads.

>> You're in a different school zone.

>> The uh that's what dads do. And and I'm

always like, you know, this is what I do

for a living. Like I can [ __ ] murder

these guys. She's like, "Dad, I'm like,

oh, you like him crushing a beer and

shotgunning it." [ __ ] I can micro

dose. What are we talking about?

[laughter]

What were you telling about? Um

>> Jamie,

>> you were tell I'm sorry. Right before we

get started, you were telling me about

something

>> SC the REM sleep or lucid dreaming

[snorts] sleep communication. I got to

figure out how where I put it.

>> I sent a DM to someone about it. I think

>> so. I got to tell you before we find. So

Eddie Bravo calls me the other day and

he goes, "Did Burke Chryser lose

everything and then get it back?" I go,

"What?" And he goes, "Yeah, it was so

confusing." He was on Shannon Sharp show

and Shannon says says to Bert, "What was

it like? You lost everything." and then

you had to build it back. And he goes,

"It seemed like it wasn't true." I go,

"It's not true." And I go, "Did Burke go

along with it?" He goes, "Yeah." I go,

"WHAT?"

And I couldn't wait to talk TO YOU ABOUT

IT CUZ I COULD totally picture someone

saying to you some story that totally

never happened and you not wanting to be

confrontational, so you just go along

with it. Is that what happened?

>> 100%. [laughter]

>> 100%.

>> [ __ ] show. How did you not say that

never happened? [laughter]

>> He just caught me off guard.

>> HE CAUGHT YOU OFF GUARD.

>> I WAS LIKE,

>> did did at any point in time you say I

should probably say this never happened.

No.

>> I was like he was like you lost

everything in my head. I was like I did.

He was [laughter] like he was like BUT

YOU MADE IT ALL BACK. AND I GO I DID.

>> WHERE IS THIS COMING FROM?

>> I HAVE NO IDEA. [laughter] HE SAID IT.

And I just was like uh-huh. Uh-huh.

>> Why did you say that?

>> I don't know. I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I

SAID AFTER. He's like how did you do it?

And I JUST WAS LIKE, MAN, I JUST LIKE I

don't know, Shannon. I just focused and

really strugg like I have no [ __ ]

clue. I should not be allowed to talk on

microphones. I literally was like, I

don't know what I said even after it to

be honest with you. But I was like, I

guess he has it in his notes. So I was

like, yeah.

>> So someone must have googled Bur

Crusher. It probably some Reddit thread.

Bird Crusher lost everything,

>> I guess. And like you know the stories

about you online are are more prevalent

than the true ones. So you just go I

guess that's what he heard.

>> You just went with it.

>> I don't know. I don't

>> That's so weird to do.

>> I was I had no I I was like in my head I

was like trying to think maybe he was

talking about like you know I had

development deals when I got into the

business.

>> Yeah you didn't lose them. They gave you

money. Just never became a show. Oh, but

then no, but I'm saying like maybe I was

in my head I was like maybe he's

thinking that like you know I had a lot

of development deals early and then I

didn't for a few years and I worked the

road and maybe that's what he was saying

and then I made I'm back. I don't know.

I was like

>> but even when you worked the road, you

worked the road then you had the Travel

Channel show. There was no period where

it made sense.

>> By the way, that is the least of my fist

to fry on that [ __ ] show. I got in so

much trouble that that show every clip

you do goes viral. every I just am like

I I I was as when I got done that I

haven't felt this in a long time. I was

like I was like wow. I was like I think

I'm going to get a lot of texts when

this airs.

>> Well, it seems like he wants that,

right? He's got a [clears throat] lot of

people on the show that talk a lot of

[ __ ] A lot of people like Cat Williams

famously was that that episode was

[ __ ] amazing.

>> We talked about that.

>> He just went in on everybody including

me. That's why I got him on the podcast.

He said, "Joe Rogan want to have me on."

>> Has the same funny [ __ ]

>> Unfunny. Yeah. Same seven unfunny

[ __ ]

I was like, "Dude, I love Cat Williams.

What are you talking about?"

>> He's the best.

>> I'm like, I never met him.

>> Yeah.

>> I had never met him before. It's like it

wasn't that I wouldn't have him on. It's

like I didn't even know he wanted to

come on. I would have had him on.

>> That interview was with him was epic.

>> Amazing. And accurate. The thing about

his [ __ ] talking is it's not he's not

lying.

>> No.

>> No. It's it's you know it's

when I got out I was like it's I don't I

don't mean this with disrespect but it's

less Shannon I think more as producers

because he's got cards. So I think the

producers are like what what clip's

going to pop? I think they go online,

>> right? They try to find controversial

subjects.

>> Like he brought up I told you he brought

up one. He's like, "Bert, you think

Kevin Hart's just lucky?" And I was

like, "Oh."

>> I was like, "I said that [ __ ] 12

years ago." And it was just it was all

it was. And I know I'm I'm even But it

was this is what it was, Joe, is like at

a time when I we none of us were making

money. Not you, but like the younger

compan

knows I love him, but Kevin's like, "I'm

the hardest working [ __ ] I'm

the hardest working. And in my head, I

was like, we're all working hard. Like,

but a lot of people, you know, were

just, you know, waiting for a moment to

to to get in front of people. And then I

was like, and then I had an agent very

casually, like not mine, but at a thing

goes, you know, Kevin should mention how

lucky he got. I was like, what do you

mean? He's like, you know about fool's

gold, right? I was like, no. He's like,

"Well, that's the beef between Kevin and

Cat is Cat packed a gun in his luggage

to go shoot fool's gold and he got

detained and they were in production and

they're like, "We need we need someone

small and black to fit these clothes. We

already got clothes for him." Yeah. And

he's like, "Get Kevin Hart." And that

was the story I wanted Kevin to tell

because that as a comic, you can kind of

put your head around that. And I've and

and by the way, I did not do a good job

of explaining it on Shannon's show

because it's like, you know, I'm a

[ __ ] talk out of my ass, but like

every comic has had these like moments

that skyrocket them, right? These

moments that pop and and I went through

it and I think you'll understand it now,

but for me it was the machine story

going viral. For for Bill Burr, it's the

Philly rant with Bill. That Philly rant

just put him in the next level. Jim

Jeff, he gets punched in the head at the

comedy seller or comedy store in London.

His manager happens to be a guy that

knows the internet, Brett Vincent,

posted on MySpace, goes viral. Every

comic that pops always has that. Tom, as

I was telling this to Tom, he goes,

"Yeah, it was me Netflix." He was like,

"Tom got on Netflix." I mean, I didn't

even realize this. Tom said it to me. He

got on Netflix when there were two

comics on Netflix.

Bill Burr and Tom Seagura. Bill puts his

special out there like, "Did you like

Bill Burr? You might like Tom Sigura."

And Tom's like, "If Comedy Central had

bought my hour, I would have been

fucked." But instead, I sold it to this

small streamer, Netflix, and the only

other one they had was Bill Burr. And

so,

>> as comics, I think sometimes, and you

know how much I believe in luck, it's so

e it's easier to hear about someone's

luck where you go, "Oh, that is crazy

that happen stance." I mean, we've said

it about you and I know you you probably

disagree maybe to a certain extent, but

you're I thought I think the greatest

thing that ever happened to you was that

getting kicked out of the comedy store

that that period of time where you had

to reeval evaluate yourself and you

created this what you have and you re I

mean you would speak to it better than I

could, but I think as comics we look at

you reinventing yourself and re

imagining yourself and and making it

your own [ __ ] entity and creating

this podcast which is changed all of our

lives that moment and it must have been

tough to lose your agent get kicked out

of the comedy store and have to figure

things out that we all got be everyone

got behind you everyone was like that's

my guy I mean I'm curious what your

feelings about that are okay if your New

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get started. I mean that certainly had

an impact. You know, it was also the

Mensia video where people could clearly

see that I was right.

>> Yes.

>> And then we were all a victim. Like we

were all hiding at the store. Like when

he would go on stage or he wouldn't be

in the back of the room if you were on

stage, they would flash the light to let

you know that he was in the room. Mhm.

>> You know how crazy that is that there's

a guy around that steals so much that

they have to flash a light whenever a

comic's on stage and then comics would

just start doing crowd work.

>> Yeah, that's insane to me.

>> It was crazy. So all the comics knew

that what I was saying was the truth and

it was proved by like the consequences

of someone who was already successful,

right? So I was already on Fear Factor

at the time. I was already a known

person and I lost my agent and I got

kicked out of the store. Like

>> that video that video was I akin to the

Philly rant Jim Jeff getting p that

viral moment for you which

>> it was also how well Red Band put it

together too cuz he's such a good

editor. He's so brilliant. It was music.

He went back in time. He like you know

like he spent a lot of time working on

that. It was a work of art. But it was,

you know, it was the first time that

someone was held accountable because,

you know, we don't have to name names,

but we all know people who snuck through

and still kind of have careers, although

greatly diminished impact because like

when they go on stage now, people are

excited to see them cuz they're famous

and then that immediately goes away when

you realize there's nothing there. They

have no material because they have to

write for themselves now.

>> Yeah. You see a giant drop off. If you

see the early specials with like great

jokes and really funny and then you see

like what is this nonsense towards the

end, it's just like weird [ __ ] like

nonsensical rants on thing. It's bizarre

to watch. But that's what happens when

you get exposed and you have to do your

own [ __ ] And there's a few of those

guys floating around out there.

>> Oh yeah. Oh yeah. It's crazy because the

one thing

>> cigar

>> uh I can't smoke cigars.

>> Really? What happened?

>> Blood clot. Oh, that's right.

>> Yeah, the I'm not supposed to smoke

cigars. I mean, I could text my

cardiologist and see what he says.

>> I heard cigars are good for you. I heard

they gave them to to Teddy Roosevelt.

>> Yeah, look what happened to him.

>> You know, I could have one cigar. If

you're going to smoke one in here, I

mean, dog, come on, son.

>> Just do it like old school Rogan where I

anytime I smoked weed, you had to pull

the camera away from me [laughter]

>> because you're on a travel channel.

Uh yeah, I mean we all have a moment

where things but it's like an

accumulation of those moments, right?

>> It's it's it's you know what it is. It's

like uh you get that moment like I'll

use Burr as an example because you know

only because I've talked to him about

this specifically, but like he he didn't

love the Philly rant because right away

everyone thought, "Oh, that's his thing.

We're going to we're going to heckle him

and he'll go lose his shit." So he

didn't love it. But the thing is that

that goes viral and then you Google that

person, you're like, "Who is this?" And

then you see a body of work that's

undeniable and you're like, "Oh, Bill

Burr is my guy." You know, uh, for for

for Shane, I mean, in my opinion, it's

it's that YouTube special he did and

then you see Gillian Keeves, you see all

his sketches.

>> It was also him getting kicked off of

SNL.

>> Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

>> Him getting kicked off SNL was huge.

Yeah. It

>> was the best thing that ever happened to

him. if he was on SNL, he would have got

buried on that show like a lot of

people. [clears throat]

But instead, he gets kicked [snorts]

off. A bunch of people are mad at him

and then they're like, "Well, what did

he actually say?" And then people start

looking into it and they go, "Oh, he was

just [ __ ] around. He was pretending

to be a racist guy in Chinatown."

>> Yeah,

>> that was the bit. Like he was just they

were just talking [ __ ] on a podcast and

then he releases that special and you

go, "Oh, he's actually a great comic."

>> Dude, his Special Olympics

[clears throat] joke.

>> He's got so many good jokes. his special

Olympia jokes. We were in the bus one

time and uh my cousin Andrew goes, "Has

anyone know Shane Gillis?" And I I've

known Shane for a while. I've I have

hysterical emails that he sent me

>> back when he was like just like open mic

or whatever

>> like going like, "Hey man, I feel like

we connected.

They're the greatest. Joe,

>> he if he knew that I was he'd be she'd

face him and go, hey, can I read your

emails on on Joe?" He'd [ __ ] lose his

[ __ ] They're so [ __ ] hysterical,

Joe. I'll send them to you. And so, uh,

I go, "Yeah, I love Shane. I love

Shane." The day I met him, he goes,

"Uh," he's like, "Yeah, I'm supposed to

go out with my girlfriend tonight." And

I was like, "But, uh, it was like 10 in

the morning. We were drinking, uh,

fireball." And he was like, "Uh,

>> 10 in the morning."

>> Yeah. We were doing a I used to do call

sick to work shows where we go to the

>> fireball at 10:00 a.m.

>> He's like, that's what he said. He I'm

supposed to go my girlfriend. I said,

"What's your girlfriend's name?" He

goes, "Big tuna." And I went, "Big

tuna?" He goes, "She's a big girl." And

I was like, "Yeah, I figured for the

name, Shane." And then I [ __ ] I' that

from that day on, but that Special

Olympic jokes when he we listened to it

in the bus, he's like, "What do you

think? Should we race them?" I mean, it

we were crying [ __ ] laughing. That's

like one of my favorite jokes I've

[ __ ] ever.

>> He's got a lot of great bits. But

[clears throat] that special he did at

the creek in the cave that was like

people got to see. They're like, "Oh,

okay. Well, this is what he does. He he

he touches on that third wire."

>> Yeah.

>> You know, the third rail, rather. And

it's like, you know, it's funny. It's

really funny. And they were trying to

label him as this horrible racist that

Saturday Night Live hired. [snorts] But,

you know,

>> anything but from my opinion. But

>> that but that happens, man. You You're

going to, you know, you're going to get

attacked. There's always something.

There's always something that a comic

says where someone's going to get mad.

Especially in this day and age. People

are just looking for things to get mad.

But almost always it helps them. If

they're a good comic, almost always like

Tony Hinchcliffe, it blew him up. Like

almost always when something happens,

you get attacked. People start looking

at you go, "Actually, this guy's really

funny." And then they become a fan.

>> Yeah.

>> Cuz you're just getting so many more

eyeballs. The people that are looking to

hate you, they're going to hate you no

matter what. But there's going to be a

bunch of people that are all like,

"What's going on?" And then they look

into it. I mean, that happened to me

during co I gained 2 million followers

in like a month. two million followers

on on Spotify in a month when they were

trying to pull me off of Spotify. When

all like all these uh music artists were

calling me a vaccine denier and removing

their podcast or removing their music

like when uh Neil Young and was it Jonie

Mitchell? Yeah, Jonie Mitchell they they

publicly removed their their music from

Spotify because of my podcast

back. Yeah. I don't know if Jonie

Mitchell is, but yeah, Neil Young is I

don't even think Neil Young actually

owned his music, which was funny. I

think it was just like a ploy. I mean,

it's like I think he probably believed a

lot of things he was saying. He was just

misinformed. He just didn't understand

that I was actually talking to people

that were legitimate scientists that

turned out they were right. Now, now we

know.

>> Yeah. But back then it was like there

was this hysteria about it and a lot of

people that were very skeptical started

tuning in and then the whole [ __ ] CNN

thing when they turned me green like all

that [ __ ] it just that helped.

>> I don't know if I could have like I'm

not good that people always go you know

if they're talking about you it's good

all press is good press and I but

anytime anything negative comes out

about me it [ __ ] devastates me. I

don't like I could not have gone through

what you went through. You just don't I

just don't read it. If you don't read

like how do you because like you come up

in my news feed all the time

>> and and like and I I'm I'm such a

[ __ ] idiot that if I'm scrolling

through Google News and I see my name, I

go, "Oh, what's that?" And then I'm

like, "God damn it.

>> You can't do that."

>> Last time I did this show, greatest

experience, Gray Hang, Lucky streaming

number one on Netflix. I'm so [ __ ]

happy. I'm in my bed going things are

going good for the big guy. hit on

Google News and it's like picture of me

and you. I was like Burke Chryser Joe

Rogan and they're like Burke Chryser

ruins the Joe Rogan podcast. I'm like

[ __ ] [snorts]

It was an MMA [ __ ] journalist and I

was like wait why god damn it. I was

like and then and then you see it and

you're like well it can't be that bad.

I'm going to read it and they're like

[snorts]

oh my god. But then my daughter Georgia

said something very profound to me. She

was like why would you allow that? I'm

sure that guy will write that same

article after this episode. She goes,

"I'm sure he will." I think the guy also

has a [ __ ] football feed. He said, "I

ruined the any anytime I do something,

there's someone that says, "Brush, you

ruined it." And I'm the only one that

reads it. And my daughter Georgia goes

literally looked at me and goes, "Did

you have fun with Joe?" I went, "Yeah, I

had a blast. I love being around Joe."

She was like, "Then [ __ ] it." She goes,

"Your experience is the one that matters

the most." She goes, "What? Why would

you allow someone to dictate your memory

of an event?" And I was like, "Oh, who

the [ __ ] raised you?" I was like, "I

don't know."

>> Well, you were on the road. She probably

raised herself. [laughter]

>> That's why she's so wise. She had to

form her own opinions.

>> She didn't read books.

>> Yeah. She had to actually form her own

opinions and think about things

rationally. Having a father like you.

Yeah. You can't you can't pay attention

because the the vast majority of people

lived miserable lives. That's the Rose

quote. Mo most men live lives of quiet

desperation. There's a lot of people out

there that are very, very sad, very

unhappy, and looking to make something

negative. They're always looking to be a

critic,

which is fine. You know, that's their

prerogative, but it's not. You don't

have to read it.

>> Well, it's I I'm at the place now like I

took Google News, I took all Google and

everything off my phone because I the

series premiered and I didn't want to

get good or bad. I was like,

>> "Good."

>> Because you can't you can't quantify the

good.

>> Like, uh, like if you're gonna if you're

gonna listen to the good, you got to

listen to the bad.

>> And I was like, "Well, I don't want to

hear the bad." So, I just want to hear

the good. And then, uh, and then we were

Jamie and I were talking about this

outside, but like you have a social

media team who's posting like like like

your your your claps. Like they're

posting like the nice articles. And I'm

like, don't even post that because like

I don't even like just stay out of it.

Just let if people like it, let them

like it.

>> [clears throat]

>> Let people have their own opinions.

That's the best move. I don't have

anybody that does that.

>> I don't have any of that.

>> Do you post all your own stuff on

Instagram?

>> On Instagram, if I post it, it's from

me.

>> Really?

>> Yeah. Always. Yeah. And then there's the

Joe Rogan Experience page that the staff

does, but that is just a clip from the

podcast. They take an interesting clip

where someone says something, it's put

up with no context. It just says, you

know, episode blah blah blah. That's it.

I try to do it as like natural and

neutral. If you like it, you don't like

it. If you don't like it, don't listen

to the next one. It's okay.

>> So, wait, what what is your what is the

impetus for you to post something like

like when at what point do you decide to

share your life?

>> Well, I just feel like if there's

something I think someone will think is

interesting or something that I would

like to see, if someone puts it on their

feed, I'll put it in there every night.

But I don't post that much because I

don't read that much. I stay off.

>> I don't think it's good for you. I think

it's not only do I not think it's good

for you, I think it's genuinely bad for

you.

>> And uh it gets in the way of all the

other stuff that I like to do. Um you

know, I'm busy, man. I'm busy. Um

there's a lot of interesting [ __ ] to pay

attention to in the world. I'm not one

of those things. I don't like paying

attention to me, you know, and reading

me or and I don't want to like go online

and see too many car crashes and people

getting shot and animal attacks. I get

Tommy and I have the worst [ __ ] text

message chain. he him and I all day

whenever he finds something like

unbelievably horrific, some guy getting

run over by a truck, he'll just send it

to me and then I'll send it to him and

we're always trying to one up each

other. So when I find something

absolutely horrible, someone says me

something absolutely horrible, I send it

to him and then we just that's like my

main source of like trauma online is my

Tom Seagora text message chain.

But other than that, I pretty much stay

off. I don't think it's good for you and

I I feel way better. I started doing it

a few months ago. It's like like a force

of habit. Like I'm looking at it all the

time. Let me just not look at it today.

And and then I did it another day and

another day. I'm like, "God, I feel

better. I feel better." Like I genuinely

feel better. It's like I'm getting over

a cold or something like that. And so I

said, "All right, well obviously like

engaging. Definitely don't read

anything. Like definitely don't like

read when people say things about you.

Definitely don't read when you you post

something. Read the comments. Don't do

any of that.

You know, people get wrapped up in it

and you realize like people are just

trying to take you down. There's so I

mean, not all of them. A lot of people

are supporting you, but it doesn't

matter if there's like 10 people that

love you and one person that hates you,

you're going to think about that one

person,

>> you know, which is nuts. But it's just

human nature.

>> It's crazy how that algorithm works is

that it's just like if the there's

someone in the front row that's not

laughing. Like last night, I had a

I don't know, it was the bottom of the

barrel and I don't know how rape came

up, but

>> it always does. And I was like, "Well,

there's no phones in here unless let's

go." I if I'm going to go for it, it's

in this room,

>> right?

>> And uh there was a woman that did not

like it. And she was a little vocal and

the crow, you know, the bouncer like,

"Yo, you know, let him, you know, was

working this out or whatever." And then

she's like, "I was told to shut up." And

then in the rest of the night, I'm

watching her out of the corner of my eye

going, "God damn it." And then I just

dug holes and holes and holes and and at

one point the whole audience is chanting

rape. And I'm like,

>> I'm like, "Guys, this is bad." But but

it's but it's it's uh it's funny. And

then also it's like listen, say you're

some [ __ ] dude looking for a

connection in life and you go to my page

and you leave a hundred comments and

they're like, [snorts] "You're the best

bird. I love you. When you come to

Cincinnati, I'm I'm going to be here.

Tampa, I'll be there, man. I'm going to

drive." And then the one time he's like,

"You're a [ __ ] bitch." And then I

reply. He's like, "Oh, I guess that's

how I get the cat to come outside." You

know?

>> So that's why I don't read I don't read

any comments.

>> Whitney was going into, you know, the

Whitney thing about Miss Rachel. I

didn't know who Miss Rachel is.

>> I found out who she is today. 1.8

billion views on how to say mom and dad.

And I was like, it makes sense, man.

>> Well, she's she's a an educator for

neurode divergent kids. Is that what it

is?

>> Yeah. I watched a couple of videos.

Pull up some videos of Miss Rachel

because after people were dra by the

way, the worst [ __ ] people were going

after her. people that I know that are

comedians that are just unbelievably

shitty, dishonest, disingenuous human

beings, bad faith communicators, people

that just like completely distort

anything about the person. Yeah.

>> And it's just because she's successful.

It's it's a giant part of it. And so

they see her making some crack about

Miss Rachel because she was watching it

with her kid. She didn't know what the

[ __ ] it is. So here's Miss Rachel. Let

me let me hear what this sounds like.

letters and two really special guests.

>> No,

>> no, not at all.

>> Dinosaurs.

>> I don't hear I don't hear anything in my

own microphone.

>> Can you help me count them?

>> Do you hear it?

>> But I don't hear you, B. There we go.

There we go.

>> 2

3

4 Four must be the number of the day.

The dinosaur eggs are hatching.

Wow. How many dinosaurs do we have?

[music]

>> One, two,

three, four.

>> Okay, pause.

>> Why would you go after this?

>> Like, this is like a little kid show.

Like, she must have been bored.

>> There's nothing different from this

Blues Clues in my opinion.

>> It's It's a show for little kids. Yeah.

Like, I don't get it.

>> I don't know. Maybe she was just trying.

>> She was trying to write a joke and

thought she'd get some traction. I guess

>> maybe she took two instead of one

[laughter] and then

>> she got a little extra energy. SHE TOOK

TWO.

>> I don't know what she's doing.

>> All of a sudden she's like, "Fuck Miss

Rachel." [laughter]

>> She took

>> But then she started responding to

people because she didn't understand

what it was she said. And then she took

it down and apologized. But you

>> that you can't apologize to the mob.

They come for you. They come for you.

And she learned. And I I texted her. I

said, "Listen, I love you to death. You

got to stop going back and forth with

these people. You can't do that. It's

not they don't this is not a genuine

conversation. They don't care if you're

like if you were a person and you were

someone's friend and you started

[ __ ] on Miss Rachel and someone said

actually that's like for kids with

learning disorders and you'd be like oh

[ __ ] I didn't know and that would be the

end of it

>> and then we'd laugh, you know. But these

people are not looking for a real

conversation. They're just looking to

destroy your life.

>> And then so many people like she lost

her career, career's over. Like what?

What? But you weren't going to see her

anyway, you [ __ ] [ __ ] Like what are

you talking about? You weren't you

weren't going to pay to see her anyway.

Stop saying her career's over. It's not

doing a damn thing to her career. You

just want it to be over because you live

a miserable [ __ ] life, which is why

you're on Threads 12 hours a day.

>> It's so funny you say that. I just read

something negative about Whitney on

Threads today. I was like, what does she

do,

>> bro? Threads is the worst.

>> And then I saw the Miss Rachel [ __ ] and

I watched a video. I had two kids. I

don't know. I look at that as I go,

that's nice.

>> If threads is like for people who

already been like humiliated on Twitter

and they're trying to find a new crowd.

Yeah.

>> It's very weird. Very very like so much

negativity. Not that Twitter isn't like

Twitter's super negative, too.

>> I haven't been on X.

>> I try to look at the news only. I try to

look at news and things that people are

exposing that's in the news, which is

very interesting. Speaking of which,

what was that thing that you found? Uh,

>> so this is very strange. This is about

people being able to communicate in

lucid dreaming.

>> True. I guess we'll find out later. But

>> scientists report first ever

communication between two humans during

sleep.

>> I'd love this.

>> Scientists say that science fiction may

be coming closer to reality. According

to reports, California startup claims it

successfully enabled two-way

communication between people while they

were lucid dreaming. Participants were

asleep in separate locations while

researchers monitored their sleep and

transmitted a coded word designed to be

perceived inside a dream without waking

them. The system reportedly re relied on

sensors, wireless communication,

and specialized software to detect dream

states and relay the message. The

company's founder says that what once

sounded like science fiction could soon

become a daily a part of daily life. No

independent scient but they're not

saying what happened. No independent

scientific replication has confirmed the

results yet. Still, the experiment

builds on real research showing that

interaction between lucid dreams is

possible. Yeah, but what is the

interaction?

>> The coded word, I guess, was it?

>> Did they relay the coded word to each

other? They both got the coded word.

>> That's where I started getting known

until weird space. But I found out this

was posted on Instagram like yesterday

or something.

>> Uh I Googled it. Press release was from

2024.

>> Breakthrough between breakthrough from

space. First ever communication between

people in dreams. So this is the article

about it in business wire. Lucid dreams

occur. Blah blah blah. Participants are

sleeping in their homes. Brain waves and

other polyoms

somnographic data were tracked remotely.

Specially designed uh developed

apparatus. When the server detected the

first participant entered a lucid dream,

it generated a How do they detect that

someone's in a lucid dream? Because a

lucid dream is a dream where you're

aware that you're dreaming.

>> Yes. It generated a random Remo word and

sent it to him via earbuds. Earbuds

participant repeated the word in his

dream with his response captured and

stored on the server. What? Eight

minutes later, the next participate uh

participant entered a lucid dream. She

received the stored message from the

first participant and confirmed it upon

awakening.

Huh.

It sounds like it sounds like they're

saying it in the room and the person's

grabbing it.

>> No, it's they're sending it through

earbuds.

>> Yeah. They were both in their own houses

as it said at the time.

>> Yeah. So, they receive it through

earbuds. He says it in the dream and

then she receives it.

>> Oh.

>> Huh. Well, you got to wonder what is

happening in dreams. Dreams are very

bizarre.

>> Have you ever lucid dreamed?

>> Yeah. Yeah. Not s I mean I I've done it

a couple of times, but I haven't on

purpose. And I've always wondered why

not. Like why haven't I read books on

lucid dreams? Why haven't I tried to do

it?

>> I think it's something that just

happens.

>> No, you could actually do it. You could

there's there's guys that practice lucid

dreaming.

>> I I mean I lucid dream pretty

extensively. Yeah.

>> Like I've ever since when I remember

when you came out with Alpha Brain,

you're one of the first things you said

it would help with lucid dreaming.

>> Oh, if you take it before bed, it

definitely helps with lucid dreaming.

>> Yeah. And I remember saying I didn't

know what lucid dreaming was at the time

and then I found out I was lucid

dreaming. And I've I've lucid dreamed my

my whole life, but now that once I knew

what it was, I could stay in a dream and

decide and I could go back into dreams.

I could restart a dream that I just had,

go back to sleep and go, I'm going back

in. Really? Yeah. Yeah.

>> It sounds crazy and I know it sounds

like horseshit, but I never knew what it

was. I never knew what it was until

Alpha Brain. There's actual techniques

that people practice and apparently they

give classes and courses on how to do

lucid books written on it because

there's there's real techniques on how

to lucid dream. I just never I I don't

know why. Like I when I'm tired I just

want to go to sleep. I go hard all day

and when I crash I just crash. I don't

want to be [ __ ] around and

experimenting while I'm sleeping. I just

want to go to sleep.

>> My lucid dreams primarily are either

like I'm I I realize I'm dreaming. I go,

"I'm asleep. I'm dreaming. This isn't

real. Oh [ __ ] I'm in control." And then

and then a lot of times it has to do

with [ __ ] like [laughter]

I'm like, "Oh, I I don't have to put a

condom on. This is great. This [ __ ] I

can't I'm going to bang all these

[ __ ] chicks in this room." And then

one time I had a lucid dream where I was

like, I could I was I knew I was

dreaming. I was outside. I had to go up

these steps into like an old cottage and

like one of those old Hollywood cottages

and I was like, I could have [ __ ] I

could have sex with anyone I want. And

in my dream, I was like, "Oh, I'll pick

your wife. How cool is that?

>> [snorts]

>> And then I went to this cottage. I know.

I [ __ ] my wife. How cool is that?

>> I know. I could have [ __ ] her in real

life. And then but a lot of my dreams

back in the day when we when I first

started lucid dreaming, I would always

decide to fly.

>> And I remember I remember I had one

right after we the first time I ever

tried Alpha Brain. I had one and I and

it was I was doing a photo shoot on

Melrose and I was like, I don't want to

be here. And then I was like, wait, I'm

dreaming. This isn't real. I was like,

I'm going to fly home. And so I just

leapt up in the air, started flying over

Hollywood and then over the hills and

then I was like, "Wait, I have no idea.

I have no frame of reference for where I

am." I was like, "It's getting dark."

And I was like, "Where's the 101?" And

then in the dream, I was just started

kept flying. And then I wake up shortly

thereafter. But it's a lot of like a lot

of sex and a lot of flying. [laughter]

A lot of people breathe underwater in

their dreams.

>> Uh, never breathe underwater.

>> Yeah. They breathe underwater in their

dreams. They fly. Flying is like really

common. I used to have like crazy

[ __ ] dreams. Like wild. I sold a TV

show to Comedy Central about my dreams.

Like I've had dreams where I wake up

laughing. I've had dreams where I wake

up crying. Like I've I I have

>> such insane [ __ ] dreams, but And I

And no one ever wants to I No one ever

wants to hear I would have dream joke

dreams like real joke dreams. Like I had

a dream. This is a real dream I had

where I was on stage and I was in a

dance position like this and uh there's

a I know this sounds horshit is a real

dream and uh and the curtain's drawn and

I look around and I see I'm standing on

stage with four or five dudes that are

all in clan outfits and I'm like oh

[ __ ] And I look down and I realize I'm

in a clan outfit and I'm like

[ __ ] And I'm like, I got to get

out of off stage. And the curtains draw

back. And I hear, and it's an all black

people. And I hear the voice, the voice

of God, ladies and gentlemen, put your

hands together for the click, clack

clan. And we started tap dancing. And we

were so good that the black people got

to their feet and they started cheering.

And we're like, oh my god. And so yeah,

that was and that was a real dream. I

woke up and I wrote it down. I used to

write down all my dreams, voice text

them. I used to voice text them all. I'd

have dreams about you and and Stan Hope

and Ro and uh and Joey Diaz. Like I I it

was like my whole world. I used to think

to myself like I I dream about Shaq the

other day. I was like I wonder if Shaq

ever dreams about me.

>> I bet he doesn't.

>> I bet he doesn't. [laughter]

>> Who's the Who's the Who's someone you've

had a dream about recently?

>> I don't really have dreams too many

dreams about people. Not people that I

know.

>> What are your dreams about?

>> My dreams are weird, man.

>> Like let's dig into this. I had a dream

that I came on the podcast I had to talk

about because it was the absolute

strangest most realistic dream of my

life and it was a dream where I

encountered these beings that were not

human and it was insanely realistic.

They were very humanlike. I think there

was four of them. They were tall and

thin and they look kind of they didn't

look human. Their heads were too big.

Their eyes are too big. And I can't I

think they had teeth. I don't remember.

But I remember they were joking with me.

Like they scared me and they like ah

just [ __ ] around like trying to get

me comfortable with who they are. And

they were communicating with me somehow

or another through thoughts. And uh I

was really freaked out because they

seemed very very real. They didn't seem

like any other dream that I had. So much

so that I woke up at like 3:30 in the

morning and I just lay in bed for an

hour trying to go back to sleep and I

couldn't go back to sleep. I was almost

like I'm not sleep. I'm wide awake. And

so I went to the gym and uh I just

worked out at 4 in the morning and I

worked out for like 2 hours and after it

was over I got in the sauna, did the

whole thing and then I came to work. I

was like I have to talk about this right

away cuz it was so strange. It was one

of the only dreams that I've ever had

that did not feel at all like a dream.

It felt like I was encountering someone

or something that was trying to get me

comfortable with the idea of

encountering them.

>> It wasn't It wasn't like a dream. It was

I was in the corridor of something that

seemed uh like it was it was not like it

was from here. It was like from

somewhere else, but it was almost like

it was very oddly lit. Like the walls

were lit in a very strange way, but it

was almost like it was was this

corridor, but it had a feeling almost

like it was organic, like it was alive,

like it was a living thing. It was very

[ __ ] strange.

>> What if what if that was But what if

that is something that you did in fact

experience that was taken out of your

memory and then it's stuck in your

memory and you're dreaming about it?

>> I

don't know. I mean, you could maybe all

day long, right? And so my feeling was

that I had and this is again it clearly

could was I was dreaming, right? So it

clearly could have been just a dream,

but what it felt like was that it was an

actual encounter with intelligence that

wasn't human. That's what it felt like.

And it felt like these things were not

they were not us. And maybe they were

what a human will be someday because

they were humanlike, but they were very

slender. They were very thin. And they

were wearing these suits that were like

almost like rash guards like what

surfers wear, but but but a strange

fabric like it looked weird. And it was

the color of their skin, but it was

clear that they were wearing something.

It didn't appear that they had any

genitals. They had no muscle tone at

all. They were just thin. And they were

communicating with me and looking at me

and they were they were close like where

you are right now. And I think like I

said I think it was at least three of

them. I think there was four of them.

But I remember there was one that was

going like like Jo and then like ah

joking around with me like trying to

scare me and then like pret like and it

felt to me after they did it like relax

like this is okay like don't be freaked

out whatever this is. Don't be freaked

out. And then I woke up and when I woke

and then there was also this weird

reptilian element of it. There was like

a barrier. They had a barrier and they

were feeding like with they were like

pouring food to these things that almost

like was letting me know the the

protection between you and this horrific

danger that's out there in

[clears throat] the world, in the

universe, in life is very it's very

thin. There's very thin protection.

There's not much protection. It was just

a like a like a barrier, like a a simple

barrier, like a you know, like a a

[ __ ] a blockade they put to keep a

crowd from passing through an area to

let you know you're not supposed to go

here.

>> It's crazy how it's crazy how much you

How long ago did you have this dream?

>> A few months ago,

>> but isn't it so wild that something that

didn't happen

>> Yeah.

>> can be locked in your memory and then

you just you're like, God, it affects

you almost like it did. Well, now it's

like a memory of my recollection of the

memory, which is odd, which is memories

in general, which is why people distort

memories and change them and make, you

know, make the past something that's not

real. You know, you've talked to people

that Yeah.

>> Yeah.

>> Yeah. We all do it.

>> I do it on podcasts.

>> Yeah. Everybody does it. But this was

different. This whatever this dream was.

I mean, look, there's a lot of

confusion about what happens during

sleep. you know, we don't exactly know

why you have dreams and what it's all

what what's the function of it, what's

the purpose of it. But this one was

different. It was much more realistic

than any dream I had ever experienced

before. Like the the interaction between

me and these these creatures, these

beings was very different than anything

I'd ever experienced in a dream. The

point like I I felt it physically and I

woke up. I can sleep on a bag of rocks.

I can just go to sleep, dude. I have my

It drives my wife crazy because she

struggles to sleep and I if we got on a

plane, I just I [snorts] just [ __ ] out

cuz I'm always going. So like when it's

time when it's downtime, I don't have a

problem sleeping, dog. I can go to

sleep. I'll sleep on a roof. I can

sleep. I couldn't go back to sleep,

which is really weird for me. I mean, I

was wide awake at 4 in the morning, you

know, and I'm like, "Okay, I'm I'm going

to the gym because I I laid in bed for a

whole hour trying to go back to sleep."

So, it's just a dream. Just go to sleep.

I'm like, "Dude, just get up. You're not

going to sleep." And I'm like, "All

right, well, I'm up. I'll just go work

out. Like, maybe that'll help me go to

sleep." Nope. I was wide awake. Wide

awake. I I wasn't even Most of the time

when I'm working out, I'm either

watching music or watching fights on TV.

I didn't even do that. I was just by

myself in silence trying to make sense

of it. Just doing chin-ups and dips and

trying to make sense of whatever the

[ __ ] that was cuz it just didn't seem

like a dream. It felt so real. It felt

so real. And when I've talked to like my

UFO friends like like Jesse Michaels is

like really into UFOs. He's like, "I

think you had a real encounter." I'm

like, "I don't know." You know, I don't

know what it was, but it certainly felt

like a real encounter, whatever it was.

Do you listen to anything while you

sleep or you sleep in the silence? Oh, I

listen to podcast so I'll have drinks

>> while you're sleeping.

>> Always.

>> That's so ridiculous.

>> I listen to

>> That's so unhealthy.

>> I listen to a podcast about Rasputin

last night. [laughter]

>> I listen You

>> ever see his dick? They have his dick

pickled in a jar.

>> Are you sering

chicks?

>> Are you sure?

>> I don't know.

>> I think he was fine.

>> It's not It's not in the

>> the giant hog like that. I think he's

put it to use. Find Rasputin's hog.

>> But he was That's what he did. I would

love to see his dick.

>> You'll see it. That's look at the size

of that hog.

>> By the way, that's limp and dead.

Imagine what that thing looked like when

it was hard. Look at that. Look on that

guy's face. Look at the size of this

coke. Look at this coke. Big old [ __ ]

pickled.

>> That's a big dick.

>> And I mean, like again, this is like a

dead man's dick. So there's no blood in

it at all. You imagine what that thing

was like hard. Big old Russian dick.

>> Big old axe handle. Thank god that

wasn't my dream.

>> So he was, you know, he was like, what

does it say? Rasputin's alleged genitals

was sold in 2000 for $8,000. Still

surrounded by mystery with some experts

believing it might actually belong to a

bull. Shut up.

>> They had a hard time killing him.

>> Yeah, they try to poison him, right?

>> And they shoot him at the end and then

throw him in the [ __ ] river.

>> Well, Russians are different white

people.

>> Ah, that's the joke I missed last night.

>> What? There was in the bottom of the

barrel they were like uh Trump versus

Putin and I was like and I was thinking

about Rasputin but I was thinking but I

was like Trump Russians are hard to kill

and then I just went on to [ __ ]

>> what what was this thing he was like a

spiritual advisor.

>> Oh Joe that's a great topic. I'll tell

you everything you know.

>> Yeah he was a self-described holy man

>> and he was from 1869 to 1966.

>> He was from Siberia. Uh so he gained

significant influence with Zar Nicholas

II after 1905 rapidly earning the trust

of both Nicholas himself and his wife

Alexandra. He became a healer in quotes

for their hemophiliac son Alexi. What

what was happening was Alexi was getting

given aspirin by the doctors and

Rasputin came in and was like yo get the

doctors away from him and he was a

hemophiliac. He had internal bleeding.

And when they removed the aspirin, which

is a blood thinner, he the kid started

to heal. And so the Zarina said, "He's

magic." Even like at one point the kid

was going to die and he wrote a letter

and he said, "Leave, tell the your kid's

going to be fine. I had a dream about

it, but get the doctors out of there."

And the doctors were always giving him

aspirin and that was what was injuring

the kid. They're all all the royalty at

that time were hemophiliacs.

>> What?

>> Yeah. Because of the inbreeding. That's

why they didn't have chins. They had

long noses and they were all

hemophiliacs.

>> Oh god.

>> And so uh but what's crazy is the

Russian so she loved Rasputin and would

write letters to Rasputin that kind of

sound a little sketchy but then all of

the all of Russia started thinking this

healer has an end to the Zar and the

Zarina. So all of a sudden this healer

is running the country. What they didn't

know they couldn't tell anyone no our

kid's a [ __ ] hemophiliac. They

couldn't tell anyone that because then

they looked weak. Oh,

>> and so, so in a weird way, Rasputin got

kind of thrown to the wolves cuz they

couldn't tell him why we why they needed

him. That she wasn't [ __ ] him. That

their marriage was intact.

>> How do you know she wasn't [ __ ] him

with that big old giant dick? That

probably the guy was laying pipe.

>> He might have been.

>> He probably was.

>> She wrote a letter that says like, "Kiss

your like she wrote a letter and

translation was like, kiss your cheek

gently."

>> Oh, yes.

>> Some [ __ ] Yeah,

>> he [ __ ] her.

>> There was It was Katherine the Great

that [ __ ] a horse.

>> I heard about that. Yeah.

>> Didn't she die [ __ ] a horse? I think

so. I went to that barn in Russ when I

was in Russia. We went to that barn.

>> If you you imbreeded, you know, multiple

generations in a row and then give them

ultimate power. They're going to start

[ __ ] horses.

>> I mean, what what kind of life is that?

What kind [snorts] of weird world is

that? You're born royal.

>> It's insane.

>> You know what I'm watching again?

>> What?

>> Game of Thrones. Started it all from the

beginning.

>> Are you serious?

>> [ __ ] amazing. We're on season two

now.

>> You Wait, your family?

>> Yeah. Me and my wife. It's so good,

dude. We did it with the girls on

vacation,

>> bro. Whoever that dude is that played

Joffrey, that guy should get all the

awards.

>> Yeah,

>> he's so good. His transition from being

a like a shitty kid to an evil king is

[ __ ] amazing. It's a He the way he

plays Joffrey is [ __ ] incredible.

>> Yeah.

>> I forgot how good that show is. It's one

of the greatest shows of all time.

>> But you'll never you'll never see him as

anything other than Joffrey.

>> Problem. Yeah, that's a problem for a

lot of people that have like significant

like Kramer like you know like

>> two things.

>> A couple things. This is the other

thing. Do you know he wrote a book and

didn't mention that in the book?

>> Really?

>> Yeah.

>> That's interesting.

>> Yeah. Somebody read the book. One one of

the comics read the book. He's like I'm

waiting for that to come up. He goes he

never [ __ ] brings it up.

>> What's the What's the title? A tell all

book except for one thing.

>> Except [laughter] for the [ __ ]

biggest thing that's ever happened.

>> Biggest thing that ever happened in my

life.

>> Not only that, it was the first

cancellation. The first public

cancellation.

>> Was that really the first cancellation?

>> Oh, yeah. Through viral video. The first

public cancellation through viral video

>> because I I remember that night because

uh I think I was at the improv and then

I came over to the store.

>> I do remember that night

>> and Brett Ernst was at the store. He had

just come over from the Laugh Factory.

He goes, "Bro," he goes, "I was just at

the Laugh Factory." He goes, "Kramer was

off the rails." He goes, he went nuts.

He got heckled. He start yelling the

n-word at these [ __ ] people in the

audience. I GO, "NO." HE GOES, "DUDE, it

was [ __ ] crazy." He goes, "He was

bombing and they were heckling him." And

then he starts dropping end bombs. I'm

like, "No way." He goes, "Yeah, I don't

know what the [ __ ] he was on, but he he

did a set at the store. He seemed a

little a little speedy, a little, you

know, a little elevated." And then left

the store, bombed the store, and went

over to the Laugh Factory. And that was

that night

>> he did uh he was at the improv the

weekend before and I was there and he

was he was doing stand up but he was

doing a a version of Kramer a version of

like crazy and he fell on a glass

>> and broke the glass and cut him and but

everyone laughed and I think everyone's

like I think he's bleeding

>> but it was like really off. Well, he was

doing really off stuff from the jump.

Like [snorts] he came to the store. I

think he just decided to start doing

standup because Seinfeld had been

cancelled for a long time. Want to start

doing something again. And he started

doing stand up, but he didn't have any

material. He would just kind of fall

down. It was weird. He would like

pretend that something went wrong and

like try to do the mic stand and slip

and fall. It was very odd. Which is also

my theory that I've been telling

everybody about Chevy Chase.

>> Okay. I'd love to hear that. So

everybody is talking about what a

terrible person Chevy Chase is and you

know there's all these videos that come

out of him screaming at people and being

mean and you know

>> I saw one with Bill Murray, Rodney

Dangerfield and him

>> where it's like back right when they're

promoting Catty Shack and he just yells

at some other guy right some other guy

that's on the set

>> and this is my take on it.

>> I want you to pull up the

like a compilation of Chevy Chase's

Pratt falls. Okay, Chevy Chase has to be

in constant pain. Has to be. He has to

be in constant pain and almost 100% has

CTE. Chevy Chase used to throw himself

down flights of stairs. He used to throw

himself off the stage into chairs and

tables. He used to like slip, go flying

through the air, land on his head. The

most

ridiculous Pratt falls. the most

aggressive violent Pratt falls you've

ever seen. And he did this for years.

Yeah. For years. Like he was in a car

crash multiple times a week for years.

>> Wow.

>> Yeah. I mean, maybe he had a shitty

personality already.

>> Well, I think he was he was also that

first generation of what fame is. Like

he was the most famous person to ever

come off SNL ever. Like his walking off

SNL was like,

>> "Get ready for a movie star." And I

don't think I don't think we'll ever I I

won't ever understand the level of fame

he had

>> at the time.

>> Like like his fame was like and this is

also I mean like look I love Bert

Reynolds

>> but but Steve Martin was super famous

too and he's not a [ __ ] No.

>> You know what I mean? It's like I don't

think that's it. I want to I want you to

see these videos.

>> I don't know why I can't find a

compilation. I can find a bunch of

videos of it but

>> just you I know there's a compilation

because I've seen it. I just typed it in

and the video that pops up only has it's

a 4-minute video of him on Johnny

Carson.

>> No, I'm just I know

>> I'm telling you there's

>> there's a bunch

there's a bunch.

>> Gerald Ford that was Gerald Ford fell,

right?

>> So he would Yeah, cuz Gerald Gerald Ford

was kind of like Biden. He would fall a

time. So here is

>> worst, dude.

>> Look at that. You know how hard he falls

there? Look, go back and watch that

again. Watch. Watch how hard he falls

when he does this. This is him doing

this Christmas.

>> What happened?

>> I lost it.

>> The Christmas thing that you just

showed.

>> I I'm telling you, it just accidentally

disappeared.

>> Joe,

>> you could find it.

>> There it is.

>> Okay, watch this. Watch this. Watch him

fall. Boom. Head first with the tree.

Falls down. Barely stops his fall.

Chvy Chase worst wrestling moments from

Saturday Night Live. Like this is just

this is him just stumbling around. This

is nothing. But there's videos of him

>> therapy session.

>> Okay. Obviously that chair is going to

break. [cheering]

No, this is not what I'm looking for.

See if you can find it. Find it and get

back to us. But there's I know there's

videos of him like literally like flying

off stage, landing on his back,

slipping, legs up in the air, landing on

a ladder.

>> Yeah.

>> I I fell I had to fall off a ladder for

a TV show one time. They're like, "We

need you to fall." And they had a a

crash pad.

>> It you get four steps up a ladder,

you're high as [ __ ]

>> Well, even if you have a crash pad, your

head is wobbling around, right? So your

brain is sloshing around from the

impact. This is one of the things that

people don't realize. Like football

players get brain damage from getting

hit in the chest. So CTE you can get

from riding a jet ski, from bouncing on

the waves. It's your brain walking,

[ __ ] bouncing around off the walls of

your skull,

>> from roller coasters.

>> You can get it from everything. You can

get it from a lot of things. Repeated

subconcussive trauma. But he fell and

landed on his [ __ ] head. Yeah. And if

you find the video that's a compilation,

there's a compilation of people like the

worst falls of Chevy Chase. And it's

crazy. And he did this for years. That

was his thing. Slip and fall. Slip and

fall. Slip and fall.

>> And tons of coke.

>> All those things. So slip and fall.

Allegedly. Tons of coke.

>> Allegedly.

>> Allegedly. I mean, I don't know. I mean,

>> I've read some books.

>> Yeah. But that the book on do you know

what happened when Bill Murray was here?

When he was talking

>> Are you talking about Bill? I love that

book. So when he read Wired, he read So

the guy who wrote Wired was Bob

Woodward. Bob Woodward was the guy that

was involved in Watergate. He was the

naval intelligence officer who became a

journalist and his first ever assignment

was to take down the president, which is